Loosing erection - cock ring help

Hi I have recently started loosing my erection when having sex with my wife. Will a cock ring help? Any recommendations? Do you normally put it round the base of the penis or round penis and balls?

many thanks

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A cock ring may help to maintain an erection once it’s established but my initial advice would be to go see your GP. I had a similar problem a few years back and it turned out that I had a very low testosterone level. Once that was diagnosed and suitable treatment prescribed the problem disappeared.

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I’ll echo the GP advice. :slightly_smiling_face:

But if you want to read up more on cock rings there are a couple of Lovehoney guides:

Cock Rings
Measuring for a Cock Ring

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Hi @astroguy,

I definitely echo @rockstar, @Ian_Chimp and @forwardghoul52’s comments, that seeing a GP is very important in this case. This is in part to rule out any underlying medical conditions: there are certain cases where wearing a cock ring can be dangerous (e.g. if you have certain allergies, or a bleeding disorder), so it is key to be fully informed before trying one yourself.

I would also suggest considering whether a cock ring is the only thing that may help you with your erection. If you are not struggling to get an erection during solo play, but you are when your wife is present, then perhaps the erectile issue is due to feelings of pressure, or a lack of communication. There are many other factors which can contribute to erectile issues, where simple things such as lifestyle changes, exercise, and speaking to a psychologist may help. However, again, I would strongly advise seeing your GP before trying anything yourself.

If your GP gives you the ‘all clear’, then cock rings may become an option for you. Cock rings work by slowing the blood flow back from the erect penis, and they can also increase sensation in the penis. Therefore, they can allow the penis to stay erect for a longer period of time. There are also many different types of cock ring: vibrating ones, metal ones, adjustable ones etc. Some are designed to go around the shaft and balls, whereas some are designed to sit on the shaft only. You can have a look at the Lovehoney Cock Rings page to see the variety that are available here.

But again, seeing your GP is definitely the priority here, in my opinion.

Hope this helps.

Edit: I forgot to mention earlier (probably because I take it for granted sometimes) that, as @forwardghoul52 rightly says, sex does not need to involve an erection. Please don’t be too harsh on yourself: there is a lot of stigma surrounding this ‘issue’, but you don’t need to feel ashamed of something that so many people with penises go through.

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Hi Everyone. Thanks for the advice. I think it’s probably best to call the GP. Guess visits are difficult at this time.

I can get an erection no problem. It’s maintaining it that’s become an issue, everything is normally fine until we get going with penetration, then I go soft, not completely but not really hard enough to carry on.
Which is why I thought of a ring for a short term solution.

If I do stay hard I then struggle to cum.

Thanks again for the help

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Also if you have been masturbating alot more or watching porn…you could be stimulated in a different way to having actual penetrative sex too which can affect erections.

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And gripping too tight when you wank too. That can then acclimatise you to need a much firmer amount of pressure than a vagina can generally provide.

I think abstaining for a period can help reset this. It used to be called the NoFap challenge if you fancy a google, but it may have evolved since I last looked it up. :+1:

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As @Goth_Girl says stress and even tiredness can have this effect and yes a ring does help if I get like that I just stroke it hard again pop a ring on and jobs a good one. If it is happening with frequency though do see GP

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I’ve experienced loss of erections with PIV sex when feeling stressed or under pressure. Essentially, wife and I had been trying for a second child after she had several miscarriages, and when it’s the best time of the month to try we would then have sex 4/5 times over a short period of time as advised by our clinician. 1st and 2nd times fine, but then after that I would get really anxious about ejaculating. This was of course a psychological issue which I talked through with my therapist and my wife and I found that watching less porn in particular helped and really taking our time and enjoying the experience rather than just going at it each time!!

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I’d definitely see your G.P first, I have almost the same predicament, as I no longer have have a sex life with my wife, masturbation is my only release now, I saw my doctor and there was no underlying problems, I can’t stay hard long enough to cum so he did prescribe viagra, now when I’m in the mood and I have the time, I have a pill and about an hour later, it’s all hands on the pumps, today was the day and I managed to wank twice and cum both times and yes I licked it all up, waste not want not, really enjoyed myself.

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Hi Zobles

Think I feel a bit anxious, its kind of got to the point where i think its going to be ok, and then when we get to PIV its ok for a minute but then I get the oh here we go again thoughts and it just goes down hill! Dont think its porn related as were working from home with two kids in the house! Dont get much time alone.

Thanks for your help

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Thanks again all… Got a telephone appointment with the GP tomorrow. Fingers crossed.

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Hi Zobles

Yes we kind of speak about it. Generally we both just laugh it off and I say it must be my age (47)

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Mine is my age, 56.

Hope all goes well with the GP @astroguy

I’ve found a cock ring won’t keep me fully erect so I wouldn’t put too much hope. Sure they help but not a long term strategy.

I’ve read that a lot of problems are psychological and that certainly matches my experience; when I’m drunk I can really struggle to climax yet when sober it’s all too quick.

I’m glad you gave your age as age is probably the biggest factor in what you’re going through.

I had a much older ex that went through this and have been waiting for my current partner (early 50s) to maybe start going through it. It’s just a natural drop in testosterone.

However, the worst thing you can do is get anxious as this then turns into a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I like to think we’re prepared for the day when it comes (without getting stressed about it) as we’ve talked about how age and hormones are starting to affect us.

There are a few options you can use if you’re having a problem getting your own happy ending. You could invest in something like the Hot Octopus Pulse or the Fun Factory Manta as with these toys (or a similar wand attachment) don’t need an erection. If you use hands/toys/tongue on your wife you can use one of these on yourself and no longer worry about losing your erection.

The lack of anxiety alone will go a long way to helping you back to normal.

I agree, keeping fit and eating healthily helps. It may be an idea to take an over 50’s multi-vitamin too. You can get them quite cheap from certain bargain High St shops.

Following this topic with interest, as have also started experiencing loss of erection at times e.g. changing position or putting on condom. Have also tried a cock ring without much success. Wondering about trying butt plug as that’s got me v hard with solo play, though don’t want to be too overstimulated that I finish too quickly.

Will also try GP through not sure how easy it is to get appointment at moment. Wondering how those resorting to Cialis/Viagra etc have got on.

Being v open with wife has helped though and we now don’t get too phased if it goes soft at wrong moment, finding other ways to carry on a session.

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I’m totally solo sexually now, I always use viagra when masturbating, works really well, sometimes twice in a few hours, definitely something I don’t regret using and not embarrassed to admit I have to use it even for solo pleasure.