We've spoken about it and OH told me she doesn't mind if I masturbate so long as she doesn't know about it...
Also the main reason I masturbate is when I get really horny I get VERY distracted, can't concentrate and also get 'blue balls' which is really painful.
I would take sex over masturbation any day.
clothespeg wrote:
Thanks, any suggestions on phrasing?
should I be using the word masturbate? Or a different one? A womans input is greatly appreciated here.
It depends on the type of woman your OH is. My hubby uses a different phrase every time, most of them amusing and direct because that's what I like. If I ask where he's off to he'll reply 'bathroom to shake hands with the man' or I need to pull a fast one', that kind of thing. My personal favourite from his repertoire is 'I'm off upstairs to whack one off, you coming?' :)
He always invites me to join him and sometimes I say yes, on rare occasions I say no. I feel this is important as he's communicating a need and including me in it, even if I choose not toget involved. It feels good to me to know that I'm welcome during his masturbation sessions and he likes to know he can do it without having to hurry or hide.
If your wife is more sensitive than I am, you could maybe use phrasing like, I need some sexy time, would you like to join me or shall I go solo? or I have an itch that needs scratching, would you like to help or shall I just do it? Give her the option to join you.
Then there's very direct. A close friend of mine has a husband who just jumps up and says 'I need a wank' and off he goes. Sometimes that turns into a sexy encounter for the two of them, sometimes she lets him get on with it.
Hope this helps.x
UPDATE so I've had a great chat with my wife, who is the most amazing person.
She knew that I played with myself, but it didn't bother her at all.
she also liked the idea of me telling her when I was going for one so she join me if she wanted to.
She also said that she would be up for more quick 5 minute sex if I wanted instead of masturbating. She only wants me to be happy.
My wife is awesome and I love her emensly.
Your wife IS awesome!
Just an idea as it seems your wife is so awesome - my wife (who's also awsome) has posed for some pretty erotic and sexy photos which I have hidden on my iPad. If I fancy a quick shuffle, I tend to use those photos to stimulate, and not feel at all guilty about "cheating".