DaisyMae, you wrote that you are 'bi-curious'. So why don't you pursue that bit and leave the threesome bit until later. I had a girlfriend who experimented with a girlfriend she knew to be gay. Later, that led on to us having a threesome after the friend agreed to give it a try. There were issues of 'possession', so there was no 'planned' sex between the girl and me. It was still an amazing experience to have her watch me and my girlfriend together, and for me to watch them.... and for me to pleasure my girlfriend while the girl was working on her. If you progress on to having a threesome with your boyfriend and your new 'girlfriend', you can set the rules to avoid you getting jealous, or even your girlfriend getting male attention she doesn't want,
From my own experience/thinking so far, the exploring bi side is difficult pill to swallow, and quite scary even if thinking about it is a massive turn on, how ever the 3sum with someone of the same sex involved, leading to trying and exploring as part of that experience somehow seems less scary or less jumping in with 2 feet? or maybe thats just me?
My OH and i have indulged in a few 3somes now, they have all been MMF, it's something i had always had in the back of my mind but never really thought to say anything about (OH is a jealous kind of man! - unless it's on his terms which i have now discovered!) One drunken night the conversation turned to 3 somes and it turns out OH gets a real big kick from the thought of seeing me wih another man! (yay!) a few weeks later and after many, many discussions we decided to speak with a mutual male friend to see if he would help us bring the fantasy to life, thankfully he decided he would love to! we have only experiemented with this particular male friend (due to OH jealous tendencies) but i am hoping to broach the subject of FFM soon, i am Bi and OH knows this, any suggestions on how to bring it up but making sure OH feels like he is control and he is the one calling the shots? thanks!
Wow its a while.since ive logged on here! In reply, we did end up trying a mmff through fab, which was amazing! Absolutely nerve wracking and afterwards I was shaking so bad I couldnt drive with all the adrenaline! We had another with a different couple a month later which was less scary but not as exciting. We had a break for a few months and recently had another 2 mmff with different couples, both the ladies meet alone so were going to try mmf soon.
Its been a journey and I havent felt at all jealous. You have to accept it for what it is- pure fun, just the physical side of sex to make the most of it.
X
There is a huge difference in being in a more open relationship to begin with and entering into a threesum after being together as a commited couple. I've never seen it end that well to be honest. There are way to many if's. And if you are questioning it now, is it worth the risk. Not all threesums end badly, but you have to have a SOLID relationship first, so tread carefully
eek didn't see reply.. glad it went well and that you tailored it to suit all involved :)
We arent questioning anything anymore. We took the plunge with minds vowing if we werent comfortable we wouldnt go through with it or try it again. We are by no means seasoned swingers, nor do we wish to be. It isnt our lifestyle choice, its something we do occasionally for fun. If our relationship wasnt solid we would have never done it. We have 100% trust in each other and talk things through thoroughly afterwards. We get married in may so im quite comfortable in saying there are no issues in our relationship that could turn this sour for us. Its good fun, social as well as sexual. You meet new people you can have a drink and a laugh with then have some safe fun afterwards. Its a new experience for us but its fantastic.
I agree though, if you have any doubts in your relationship this isnt for you. It would cause more damage than anything. Xx
Congrats on the wdding, hope you have a wonderful day xxx Yeah I see alot question it or feel guilted into it and it falls apart after. Me personally, i'm the type of person who needs to know what type of relationship it is to begin with, i'm not good at shifting or changing down the line lol. x
Haha! Well it started off as a bit of a joke but the more I thought about it the more I liked the idea. Hes so laid back he may as well be horizontal so the issues were only ever going to be mine. I just thought fuck it! If you dont like . it . don't do it again, no harm done. I know im lucky.to be in a position that I can say that and sound so blasé but its good fun. Thanks for the congrats. It's scary now! A wife!!! Me!!! Haha xx
I was of the same opinon of you HGL. I'm so monogomous, I couldn't ever imagine seeing my OH with someone else, it would destroy me. But from seeing posts on here from other people I've realised it doesn't always have to end badly, and the majority of the time the couples actually stay together. I then realised I was just judging what my own relationship is like and presuming that everyone has to be like me, which is really wrong. I've learnt that couples that tend to get involved with threesomes or swinging actually have a remarkably strong relationship, and in textbook probably a stronger realationship than monogomous couples (although they are monogomous with each other, but I can't think of a better fitting word). It takes a remarkable amount of trust and faith that your partner is doing it for fun, and not because they want to cheat on each other, it's a way of progressing their sex life, and I think it's amazing they can do that and not be jealous. It' a quality I really admire, if someone even looks at my husband I'm seven shades of green!! It's still not something I could do myself, not because of trust, because I'm terribly jealous person (only child syndrome!), but since being on this forum it's now something I understand and admire the level of commitment.