So me and the oh have played monogamy a couple times now and it is great! We set aside a evening each time to play it in full. One night due to our for dice rolling getting many 1-3's we were at it for hours. Much to my pleasure. We have the policy that if your not comfortable with the card it goes to the bottom of the pile and pick another. Which is insightful in itself as I have more of a picture of were she is, also a few have been not now but in the future, which shows promise.
But my only little gripe is that when it comes to the final fantasy cards or any do later cards, she forgets or doesn't bother. I don't want to spoil the fun of the game by saying anything, but she is happy to do the fantasy, but just doesn't bother, frustrating! Especially when I'm looking forward to getting that school girl fantasy! Ahhhh well anyone else felt this?
I can see why women don't like schoolgirls fantasties, I really can.
*some women. That's no slight on those who enjoy it. I can see that too. :)
I have to be honest, myself and every female I've ever discussed it with, actually find the whole school girl fantasy very worrying, to say the least. The common theme of thought seems to be school girls are underage, apart from maybe a few months in their last year depending when they turn 16, but for the most part it comes across as a fantasy of wanting to have sex with someone underage, without breaking the law. I think the maternal instinct is part of it, a lot of women want children and naturally feel protective of them, so a schoolgirl outfit to many is inappropriate as it stands for making someone look under age and in turn sexualising all those underage school girls. My ex partner was into dress up, and schoolgirl was one of the first he mentioned. It caused a massive arguement, and he was well aware i was disgusted with him, at which point he did what he always did and pretended he didn't want it and had "no idea" why he even suggested it. I never felt fully comfortable with him after that, and after "other things" came to light, it creeped me out and made me feel ill and i would run the opposite direction of any man now who had any kind of fantasy about school girl dress up.
Have you considered she's pretending at the time she will do it later to not ruin the mood, but actually dsoes not like it and is hoping you forget or don't bring it up again because it makes her uncomfortable or is against what she's into or willing to do.
Ok I think a but too much focus on the school girl outfit comment, that was just a example. For example one she had and choose when she won was to tie me to a chair and do what she wants with me. But this has never transpired.
Maybe she doesn't want to spoil the fun of the game by telling you she's not into the idea of the fantasy fulfilling parts?
I think that in the heat of a moment or during the excitement of a game it's easy to say yes I will do this or that. But once she's not horny or excited, she might find the idea of dressing up or tying you up too embarrassing or even difficult to do.
A completely unrelated example from my own experiences is giving a BJ. If the OH just grabs me in the kitchen and demands it, I can't get him anywhere near my throat before gagging, but if I'm turned on myself, I do a hell of a lot better.
Maybe try subtly suggesting one of the less adventurous save it for laters next time you have her raring to go. She might be more open to it then.
I agree with Ouch, in the heat of the moment she may feel like it's something she wants to try, particularly if you're having a few drinks while you play.
And in the cold light of day she realises she doesn't want to try them at all, and it's easier to say nothing and hope you don't mention it than risk disappointing you.
As for the schoolgirl fantasy, it's exactly that- FANTASY, nothing sordid about it.
I like it, for me it's the pretending to be innocent that turns me on, and never, ever do I imagine me or the guy is underage, that would be a massive turn off.
It's the thought of being shown what to do by someone more experienced that does it for me. Any guys I've known that like this fantasy say the same thing.
Like with anything some people like it and some don't.
Completly agree with delilah! :) x
Wow a heated thread!
OK the poster first,
It sounds like when turned on, in the moment, built up, she's up for it.
But coming to it cold and rational....well that's different.
Maybe if you can both warm up another night with fire play then mention it she'll be more up for it.
The schoolgirl thing....
I get why some people see it being wrong. Its not my thing to be honest for similar reasons. But don't forget a lot of our early sexual fantasies are at the Hugh school age and we're shaped by those times, when things generally are simpler. I think the school girl fantasy feeds off that, and isn't a 'going girls' thing, just a nostalgic reference to those early fantasies.
Hi in my head this feels linked to the OP, think I may have the same problem as his OH.
I've been with my partner for years, like everything our sex life has had its ups and downs but I think we're fairly adventurous and both try to make an effort. But dressing up/role play have never been attempted. We were talking and he said he'd like me to lap dance for him. At first I liked this idea but now realise I don't know what to do. Literally!! Any ideas would be appreciated ... Do I strip in front of him? Imagine he's not allowed to touch me, do I tell him this? Music? Lingerie? Do I just dance in front of him??
We will have the house to ourselves next Saturday so would like to surprise him then. We know each other so so well think it will be hard to pull off, can imagine I will giggle! But would love it if I can pull it off.
Thanks for any thoughts
Sleazysue wrote:
Hi in my head this feels linked to the OP, think I may have the same problem as his OH.
I've been with my partner for years, like everything our sex life has had its ups and downs but I think we're fairly adventurous and both try to make an effort. But dressing up/role play have never been attempted. We were talking and he said he'd like me to lap dance for him. At first I liked this idea but now realise I don't know what to do. Literally!! Any ideas would be appreciated ... Do I strip in front of him? Imagine he's not allowed to touch me, do I tell him this? Music? Lingerie? Do I just dance in front of him??
We will have the house to ourselves next Saturday so would like to surprise him then. We know each other so so well think it will be hard to pull off, can imagine I will giggle! But would love it if I can pull it off.
Thanks for any thoughts
Well some confidence and sassyness I needed. A drink or two to loosen up but not to be drunk can be handy. A lapdance is one of my favourite things. Wearing lots of lingerie components that arnt to difficult to remove like bra, thong, suspender belt, stockings, heels. Sensual music and dance seductively. Using hips. Don't be afraid to get on the floor and stick that bum out like some sexual positions. His hands to the side no touching, the tease factor makes it better. Grind and get close to him. My favourite move is when she faces away from me legs slightly apart but straight, arms straight, thumbs in panties and pull down arms straight bending over. For me it finishes best when the dancer makes me a proposal to go further and gives me a BJ between my legs when seated
Thanks all for comments. So I need to make her as comfortable normally as when she is a little tipsy and horny
Thanks! Really helpful, sounds daft but hadn't thought of getting on the floor, but will do, know what he will like to see. And yes a g and t will help channel my inner sassiness!