So I was charging one of my happy rabbits and I forgot it was on the floor in full view and my mum came in and it was too far away from me to hide it quick so out of instinct, I screamed at her to get out of my room which I regret doing. I feel so embarrassed because I find it weird for any of my family to see any part of my sex life including sex toys. Does anyone have advise?
@sharbur I can understand your embarrassment may be a lockable box would be useful for storage. However you are on this world due to your mum having sex. The toy is just assisting with your needs (so to speak).
Surely it’s your room, your sex life, It might be embarrassing but you need to own it, you do you!
But also a little lock box or charging your toys out of sight might help ha
Also I’d apologise to you mum for shouting if you want to, you don’t need to tell her anything else than that
Can you have a talk to your mum about your room and it being your own space. Having walked in on my son enjoying his own private time once, that was enough and now make sure to knock and wait. She’ll likely be just as embarrassed as you are about it. Clear the air and set some ground rules.
She is a sexual being too and most likely went through similar experiences with her mother
I actually had a similarish experience. I recieved a broken toy and I’d genuinely never returned anything before so I’d asked my parents about how to do it and they asked to see the ‘electronic’ to see if they could fix it. I think me immediately saying no I’d rather not gave away away the kind of thing it was after all that i didn’t even need to return it, they just said to bin it
Though I’m not really the best example as i think my parents are basically determined to ignore anything related to me and sex until they feel it’s absolutely necessary to talk about it (ie when i actually bring home a partner)
But honestly yeah as suggested above I’d just apologise for yelling at her and go from there, if she says anything about it then the conversation can adapt from there
I remember hiding my cigarettes and my rabbit in my glove compartment when I moved out so my folks wouldn’t find it when helping me to unload boxes … then my dad wanted to check my glove to make sure I had an ice scraper, a shammy and god knows what else. He couldn’t understand me saying “no leave it please”.
My advice is get something non conspicuous to store said bunny in whilst charging…
I would very well imagine that your Mum is aware that you are or you have indulged in some sexual experiences by now. She would not think anything of it if she actually saw it that is. Just carry on as normal and don’t think too much of it.
I have had worse, not with a Rabbit I hasten to add, it soon gets forgotten about.
Mums have sex too. Its not the reserve of the young. She probably has a collection of toys thats far larger than yours. Let it go and move on.
Reminds me of a couple of funny incidents, first my phone was broken n I’d sent it off for repair n I asked me dad to log in n delete any unimportant e-mails, straight away he goes "lovehoney that’s that sex sight" my reply was “and don’t you know what it is”, as there was no ads back then. Needless to say that ended that conversation. The other occasion is when the family came up to visit us n dad was helping hubs (My bf back then) take our old bed apart and set the new one up n I’d forgotten about the under the bed restraints n I hears “What are they” hubs replies "Oh fuk knows ask Alyssa .) He didn’t ask though he obviously knew n wanted to embarrass hubs who claims he daint get embarrassed but daint fess up.
Oh then there’s the time we’d just moved in together n the folks came to visit n I was showing dad pics n my phone at that time never flicked straight to the next pic so I’d repeatedly try swiping then they all flew by n it landed on a dick pick n dad goes "wife she’s got a pic of his cock .) Now me n me dad am sound but me mom let’s just say she believes sex shouldn’t be spoken about n toys n bdsm are dirty so that was the only time I was embarrassed, why he had to shout it I’ll never know n I mean he shouted it
Don’t worry, how do you think you got here haha!
I always think that if a young person living at home is old enough to be sexually active then most of the time it’s probably appropriate to have a ‘knock and wait’ rule for parents. That was always the rule in our house when I was young. Once we were 16 or so and judged sufficiently mature then parents would start knocking and (so long as they didn’t suspect anything really unreasonable) the ‘open door’ policy when entertaining went as well.
Bet you’re not allowed just to wander into their room as you see fit.
My mum’s the kind of person to knock then walk straight into my room so I understand being on high alert to hide sex toys or just hide having sex. I got a black sex toy storage bag to hide my toys and if I need them to dry/charge after use, I put them on my window sill behind the blinds. You could also have a conversation about personal private space with your mum.
I remember being on the other end of the story when I was 15-16. I was going through my mums room (can’t remember why) and found her collection of butt plugs, dildos & wands… she has no idea but it was very off putting and I try to hide the memory at the back of my head
Little toy box hidden out of sight and out of mind, charging hmmmmm look at doing at descreate times…
I think lots of people have this problem whether it’s parents / siblings or children…
My Mum came to visit yesterday (a weekly occurrence). I had left a couple of toys drying on the bathroom window ledge after cleaning them and, though it had crossed my mind to put them away before she arrived, I was in the middle of doing about 10 other things and I reasoned that she tends to use the downstairs loo if she needs to.
Come to her being about to leave and she says "I’ll just nip up to the bathroom’. I was like, “I think you’d better use the downstairs one, the upstairs one is full of sex toys!”. “Ah, righto!”, she says. I’m not sure if she thought I was joking but she didn’t go up.
I find it’s better to be honest about these things if you need to be, shame tends to come from trying to hide stuff. I’m not about to be ashamed of my sexuality or what I do in my own house so I was honest, gave her fair warning and that was that.
If I were you I’d get a lockbox and maybe try to remember to charge in a more discreet place. Have a quick word with your Mum, apologise for shouting and say that if she was in any way embarrassed or offended she might want to knock and wait before she enters your room in future. If you feel like it’s hanging over you the best way is to just talk about it, clear the air and move on. You’re both adults, I’m sure she’s not as shocked as you probably think.
@sharbur, I think for many of us, we’ve all had an embarrassing moment where a family member has found something or caught us masturbating (wasn’t a fun time for me), so take comfort in the knowledge that you’re not alone! My suggestion would be find a charger near a drawer so you can put it in the drawer whilst it’s charging?
I’m assuming either you still live at home or your mum came to visit?
I know that this would be embarrassing but after everything has settled down maybe you could get lunch with mom and just explain it to her about your rabbit and I don’t know what y’all’s relationship is but I hope she would be understanding About your needs and tell her you are sorry for yelling I hope it works out
Absolutely no need to be embarrassed about it and I don’t see any reason why it has to be an issue.
As I’ve mentioned in another thread my mother in law walked in on us full view of everything, never been mentioned again.
Same with you, I suspect your mum has seen it all.
I just wouldn’t mention it again, if it does get referred to then just say “what you talking about, you saw nothing”
These things happen.
Haha!! Oh dear I’d be horrified too if my parents saw any of my toys but think what I’d do is say nothing unless they say something as chances are on both sides we’d pretend nothing was seen to avoid any awkwardness
And never know your mum may not have actually seen it when she walked in!
Is your mum very religious, nobody seems to have considered that even today some may see this in a religious perspective? If so, this might make it more awkward to ignore/discuss. If not, as others have said, she knows what human needs are and should accept she should have knocked and waited, and possibly is equally embarrassed by her faux pas.
Me and my mum have spoke and made up. She didn’t even see it and she was confused why I shouted at her. We are all good now
Thanks everyone for their replies
I personally wouldnt have any embarresment over the toy as such, sex is a natural part of life and pretty much everyone has a sex drive. I would apologise to your mother for shouting but im betting your mam isnt as bothered about the toy as you think she is.