My peeping Tom has been caught by his wife

Thanks for all your great advice. On balance you are siding with my husband and I think I will ignore the WhatsApp slur.

Incidentally she called me a slut who was leading her husband on by flashing myself. However I am not going to close the curtains in my dressing bedroom and she can keep her husband away from the window in the morning as far as I am concerned.

Someone asked if I like showing him my naked body and the answer to that is that I am not ashamed of my body and love to sunbathe naked on naturist beaches, so I am fairly body confident. I suppose it takes all sorts to make a world.


There’s 2 ways to handle it…ignore or full attack mode. Since it doesn’t seem to bug you much, probably just ignore.

In my case, the initial peeping wouldn’t have been welcome. My husband would have paid a visit, accompanied by a couple of his merry men.


@Anony said what I wanted to say, but found but words that I couldn’t to say it in a way that wouldn’t be misinterpreted as implying any unjustified criticism of you.

You can almost imagine the scene when his wife caught him, “she was flashing at me” is about the only thing he could say to defend his own actions. Not sure how he could try to explain why he got himself a comfy seat and got his binoculars out though ! Be careful though - he’s well and truly in the doghouse with his wife now and probably sleeping on the sofa, don’t do or say anything that he can use to get himself out of that situation at your expense.

Anything you post on the WhatsApp group will be twisted and used against you. Taking pictures of him in his own home and posting them on a group chat will put you outside the Law - and 2 wrongs don’t make a right in the eyes of English Law !

I still think doing nothing is the best option. The least bad thing to do would be to call the police and tell them you’re being spied on and being subject to offensive messages online - a visit from the Neighborhood Policing Team will shut her up - but will also put a stop to him (and perhaps you?) having 5 minutes of innocent fun every morning.


Well said @Love_Stud_Too you have done nothing wrong and I am very pleased you are confident with your body. I think others reading the whats app will be thinking, he should not be looking rather than you being at fault. I would say GOOD FOR YOU GIRL.

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Wow, I’m sorry to hear this happened! Her husband’s behavior is not your responsibility. I agree, I don’t think there’s a point in engaging, it’ll just add fuel to the fire. The lady will get over herself and realize how dramatic she’s being. You’re allowed to do whatever you want in your own home.

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Frankly I’d call the police. Both for the peeping and for the online abuse.

Then see how vindictive she is when the uniforms turn up at her door.

Do not take ANY shit from people like that. Shut them down quickly and HARD or you’ll go on having trouble with them. Press charges if that’s an option.

Whatever you do, do NOT respond or go round. Stay whiter than white and simply call the police, if you respond then (rightly or wrongly) they seem to downgrade it and chalk it up as a ‘neighbour dispute’ which they’re unlikely to want to get involved in.

If you complain over the peeping (which would check the sexual harassment and stalking boxes) and the online abuse then they’ll be all over it as both of these offences have been in news / on the political agenda in recent times and they desperately want to be seem to be tacking them.

Make sure YOU complain not your husband, and make a point of say how you as a woman feel violated and unsafe in your own home / community etc etc. Make it clear that you feel threatened in a stalkery / sexual way by the husband and in a more general way by the womans online behaviour.

Wow, shocking situation, and so many comments on here I agree with.
Specifically @Anony in terms of not changing behaviour. You are in your own house, and fully entitled to get dressed. Unless of course there is a performance of sorts for his benefit, and even then - you’ve not asked him to sit there with a pair of binoculars!
Also agree with @SW2003 on comments re advising Police. If there is another room he is visible from, might be an idea of hubby getting a pic of him looking, or a discrete way of catching him in the act.

Of course, the wife’s behaviour would be the trigger, and I’d find it very difficult to let that go. She is trying to shame you because her man prefers to watch you and isn’t content with what he has. Maybe she isn’t satisfying his needs and it is making things difficult for them both - but thats their beef, and has nothing to do with you.

So yeah, my response would be to capture the message sent, evidence the peeping tom using his binoculars, and pass the information on to the police, advising that you wasn’t aware this was happening until you saw her message and now feel threatened by them both.


Thanks for your good advice. We have decided to ignore them and I’m carrying on with my daily dressing routine.

There has been no response on WhatsApp from any of the neighbours. So we are happy to let it blow over.


Hold on to your serenity! It their problem, not yours. And to be honest your neighbours are probably laughing at HER, rather than you :heart: