Hi nice guys and gals,
I've just received a Sportsheets Beginner's Bondage Kit
from lovehoney, I'm looking forward to using it when my gf gets back from holiday, thinking of tieing her on her back with arms and legs attached to the headboard first but then my brain gets distracted and I can't think of anything else!
So I thought id mine you guys for some knowledge and see if you can recommend some other positions?
Apologies if similar thread somewhere else-i searched but there is so much chat on here -which is great!
Also thinking of sewing(well I'd give it a bash) some d-rings to the straps to the ends to make it quicker to attach -any thoughts on that?
Thanks muchos,
T
For me it's about what's done or not done when tied up rather than the position tied in.
think about teasing, titillation, tickling, touching, suggestion, denial, blindfold, massage, kissing, holding.
Anticipation and loss of control is what she will feel being bound, your job is to blow her mind by just being loving and tender (unless she likes it rough), take your time, make her wait.
do you have other toys/bondage paraphernalia?
I agree completely with this just make it fun for both xxSum Sub wrote:
For me it's about what's done or not done when tied up rather than the position tied in.
think about teasing, titillation, tickling, touching, suggestion, denial, blindfold, massage, kissing, holding.
Anticipation and loss of control is what she will feel being bound, your job is to blow her mind by just being loving and tender (unless she likes it rough), take your time, make her wait.
do you have other toys/bondage paraphernalia?
Hi,
Thanks for the speedy response! That's a great point, I'll wait and see what she likes and use that for variety,
Not really, we have just started to explore -we looked for a vibrator together and tried it but she doesn't like the feeling, though maybe at least part of it is the fear though we've tried a few times to introduce it in a gentle way but without pleasure and I don't want to kill the mood any more so we don't use it, she likes a gentle slap but that's as far as we have gone, to be honest we have only looked at toys recently so not too sure what's all out there that would be good for us
T
So you could prepare with some household items.
Do you have a silk tie - you could use that for tickling, or a dressing gown belt.
Then maybe something a bit pointy/hard like the handle of a toothbrush or hairbrush to mix up the sensations a little.
If she likes a little slap, try doing it with different things - a book, wooden spoon, hair brush.
Just think different textures, different materials, try it on the inside of your upper arm to see what it feels like.
Once you start thinking of these ideas they just flow...
With the toy, suggests she uses it alone. If she is comfortable.alone more chance of it with you. Also trying to use it without vibrations sometimes helps. If you haven't dome much bondage maybe better starting with just her hands restrained...build it up slowly so you can learn to trust each other. Xx
Wow, some great ideas, I think she will like them once she is powerless to resist! I'll find something soft and try a tickle so long as she doesn't tickle me when she gets loose! Shame I've got four days to wait...
Oooh. Nearly forgot, whatever you do, talk about it afterwards to learn what she did and didn't like so you can improve for next time. Give her space to offer ideas too.
This is a must...some questions can be asked during play too but not too many or they a mood killer xSum Sub wrote:
Oooh. Nearly forgot, whatever you do, talk about it afterwards to learn what she did and didn't like so you can improve for next time. Give her space to offer ideas too.
Hi kayliixx,
Thanks for the info, I will suggest she try it on her own but I think she has grown up feeling bad about masturbation so she doesn't do it very often or heavily (no fingers or anything) despite me trying to encourage her but im not going to pressurise her in to anything so I don't want to go too far in suggesting it all the time-I assume some girls just never like it? I should have said I have tied her wrists up with ribbons a couple of times and we both liked it hence the starter kit but we will start easy!
Good luck tobias.
May your 4 days pass super quick ;)
Thanks Sum Sub, very helpful tips, and I hope so too!
I was very similar tbh, my mum bought me my first toy and it lay in its box for over a year then I met an ex and we spoke and he showed me it was more common than I thought and I gradually took am interest. Now my toy collection is slowly growing and I don't know how I coped without toys.
Can I suggest instead of a vibrator maybe trying a bullet? This one is great and I reviewed it recently.
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=22122
Bullets are for external play and alot less intimidating if you aren't familiar with toys for this reason. It can also be used as a massager as well as a sex toy. And well worth £10 xx
So there's still a chance! So what changed for you do you think? Was it encouragement or just time?
We ended up getting the Tracey Cox Supersex Bullet Vibrator, is that the same thing? To be honest I'm not really sure how to use them so maybe it's my fault- We tried it switched off first and then with it on but I think the shock was a bit much for her in a bit worried that I've scared her with the first few tries so now it's even harder for her to relax so maybe solo is maybe the way to go, unless I try one more time?
Bullets are better used for clitoral play, using the vibrations on the clitoris. But maybe try using it as a massager in other areas such as nipples inside of legs use your imagination, and remember external play.
I think it was a mixture he spoke about it but wouldnt push me to try. My first toy was a rabbit which I think was too much tbh. However time was a major factor I only really started using toys after we split. Like I say gentle encouragement and discussions. Have yous watched the tutorials on some toys that some products have. These would maybe benefit both of you. You in how to use them.effectively and her in her confidence.
You have a great approach though with encouraging her but not pushing her. Good luck xx
I would definately suggest she tried thing solo, as this way she can figure out what she enjoys and let you know. Another great thing is her using toys while ypu watch, she may find this a little too much to begin with hut it will show you what she likes and also is usually a massive turn on for guys and her as she knows she is turning you on xx
Yeah I get more turned on the more she enjoys what she is doing so I think I would love it, one day maybe, funny about the taking about it -while she's been away we have talked a lot about what we like and things we would like to try, think as we're new to this it kind of helps not having the risk of her being repulsed in front of me helps and maybe for her too,
Re the toy-that's why we chose that one as it's small and inoffensive! I guess that's the first hurdle
We haven't seen the videos so will suggest we watch the videos in a while
Im not sure if there are videos for everyone but some have them and just give you a better idea what to do. I honestly hope yous have a great time. Talking when seperated works, my last relationship was long distance so talking was a big part and made a difference as we could say things we couldnt say infront of each other.
Give it time and have fun learning things together.all the best xx
Thanks very much, lots to work on and I'm looking forward to it!