So your SO is wanting some play, and you’re just not feeling it. Do you ever just accommodate them, or participate in some way? Even to the point of posing for them in some lingerie or letting them touch you for adding to their pleasure?
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This does seem to be directed to your wife, going by your last thread.
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No, if one of us is not in the mood we don’t have sex. But we do have sex a lot on a normal basis so if one day one of us is just not feeling it, there is always tomorrow.
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No, it’s not directed toward my wife. I was asking for how people feel about this in general . Sometimes one of us is want some pleasure, and either of us will accommodate the other even if we are not in the mood ourselves. Not necessarily intercourse, just even a massage, or being present.
If either of us are not in the mood its normally due to illness, bloating from eating too much, stress due to hubbys mum being very ill, feeling tired. We normally decide to put it off until the next day or until the other one is feeling better. We would not normally pressure the other to help the other get off.
Personally if i was not in the mood that day and he could not perform the following day because he masterbated i would be miffed.
Yes, that has been our pattern in the past. When we were having sex more frequently, missing a couple days was not an issue, and I always expected we would get back at it another day.
This feels like Deja vu somewhat.
I can’t help but feel this is very much a follow on from previous posts and especially this one from yesterday 
I do have one question, have you spoken to your wife since your original post? Because you should really be communicating with her 
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Again, this was not a question about my previous post, more a general thought about how other couples might handle the situation. We will get around to our own discussion as I know we need that.
So if one of us is not in the mood. Genuinely we just leave it no big deal it happens sometimes. But if either of us is super horny and needs to cum. We will simply say. I really need to cum. Would u like to watch or help. And away we go
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You know that is a great way of dealing with things too. And we take the thought that there will be another chance at some time later. It usually works fine that way.
So part of the reason I posed the questions is how we deal with individual desires as a couple.
There have been lots of times when one of us wants to do something, go to a concert, see a play, eat at a certain restaurant etc. We usually work it out and go or see things as a couple, because that makes it a shared experience, and much more fun. There was a time my wife wanted to go see a musical play, something I disliked in the past. I went anyway because it was important to her, and had a great time. That’s all I’m trying to say. Doing things together is much more fun.
If one of us isn’t in the mood we either just leave it, or it will be that the one who is in the mood will have a solo session. No hard or fast rules.
Samantha here. This situation doesnt really arise often. Im very very rarely not in the mood. It can be 4am and he can wake me up and do want he wants. Hes wanked over me while im asleep a few times.
If were both too tired when we get into bed, ill generally give him him a bj. Sometimes it leads to sex and sometimes I just suck him until he cums.
The other night he was quite stressed with work and stopped half way through sex. I had already cum a few times but he used my wand on me to finnish me off
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My husband has a much lower libido than me so he just knows i masturbate.
My other partner and I are much more matched sexually so sometimes (often) we masturbate together, long-distance.
If I woke my wife up at 4 am the house better be on fire, a blowjob…yeah, that’ll work.
Me i am rarely in the same bed as hubby at 4 am. He gets to sleep very quickly and he is a snorer so his snoring keeps me awake. I end up having to go to another room.
I find unless I’m ill (and even then it’s quite ill - today for example my eyes are streaming and my nose is blocked but give the lemsip 20 minutes to kick in and I’m good) I’m in the mood.
My wife, less so, but I understand that and she understands that I understand. So sometimes I will tell her that I am “going to go upstairs for a brief nap”. We both know what I mean, but helps to say that in case others in the house hear (and sometimes I will take a small nap after). No issues really.
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I usually take a dose of Sidenafil if I know we’re going to make love in case I have issues staying hard. I don’t announce I’m going to jerk off. I’ll do it as needed in between our couples play. I don’t think she knows when I’m having alone time. But I’m always ready when she needs.
We either reschedule or I will help him out.
Nice.
With my 1st wife, never.
With my current wife, 2nd wife, we both do this, help out, watch etc. but that’s rare as we’re both in the mood a lot.
My ex-wife weaponized sex, was the gatekeeper. Yes, we had issues galore.
I have no idea what she was like with her next husband’s (yes, plural as she’s been married a few more times since me).
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to help out etc. It’s that wasn’t possible with my ex-wife.
To be able to do this requires both partners to be in agreement of course. I couldn’t with my 1st wife, I can with my 2nd wife.
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