Dearest Gentle Reader,
The time has come for my review of the sex that was had in this year of our lord 2025 between Mrs. LRLRL and myself. Settle in for the read this year will not be for the faint of heart!
This is my 4th year of tracking with my more detailed/full data set. Very exciting! And apparently achieving some degree of notoriety around here (thanks, @Peitho for the shout-out on a recent post!). Here’s what’s new this year, data tracking wise:
- Toys Used - Dedicated Column for listing toys used for a word-count of most used toys and frequency. Attempted consistent naming/shorthand for frequently occurring toys.
- All Positions Used: Addition of a text entry column to enter all positions used during an “encounter.” More room for human error, but I have used a word-counter method to get a better count of positions used in total, if it was memorable enough for me to log next day or whenever. Will result in a change to year-over-year position stats.
Meanwhile building on what I’ve tracked historically:
- Encounters each entry on the dated line for a sexual encounter, basically anything mutually engaging that involves our sexual organs. Neither orgasm nor penetration required, but is intentional sexual engagement beyond copping a feel in passing or making out in the kitchen.
- PIV count of which of these involve any amount of PIV. Not required to be the method of orgasm.
- Orgasm counts for each of us
- Type of sex we had (bedtime, quickie, sexcapade, virtual, etc). A common question of definition: a “sexcapade” for us is a premeditated time set aside that usually involves more exploration, use of toys, lingerie, bondage, etc.
- Enhancements/Detail tallies for tracking whether we included anal, bondage, cunnilingus, fellatio, roleplay, toys, etc.
- Notes column for naming any other incidents/qualifiers of note (period sex, performance issues, roleplay specifics, location).
Dataset demographics:
- Him: 40, Male, Married, Monogamous, Heterosexual
- Her: 40, Female, Married, Monogamous, Heteroish (bicurious)
THE NUMBERS
Total sexual encounters: 341 (+18, 5.5% from 2024, and a new high since recording)
PIV: 337 (+16, 4.9%)
His (my) orgasms: 330 (+19, 6.1%)
Her (wifey) orgasms: 322 (+14, 4.5%)
Figure 1 - Year-Over-Year
Peak Month (mode): TIED March/April (31 encounters)
Peak Month (mean): 1st May (1.06/day), 2nd place April (1.03/day)
Low Month (mode & mean): September (24 encounters at 0.80/day) - 2nd Year Running
Figure 2 - Monthly Count - Sexings and Orgasms
Peak Day: January 19 - 3x
- Sexcapade (cowgirl, prone, missionary, 69, face-fucking, fellatio, titty-fucking, rimming, NO TOYS!?);
- Quickie (prone, in-and-out, no orgasms - I didn’t make a note but I think we may have flown too close to the son and tried to sneak another round before being interrupted by the kids);
- Bedtime (missionary, Melt, Cockring)
Most Repetitive Month: March - 5 days multiple encounters (3 quickie + bedtime; 1 bedtime + midnight; 1 wee hours sexsomnia + bedtime)
Monthly Average Encounters: 28.42 (+1.67)
Monthly Average His Orgasms: 27.42 (+1.5)
Monthly Average Her Orgasms: 26.67 (+1.0)
Weekly Average Encounters: 6.56 (+0.35)
Weekly Average His Orgasms: 6.33 (+0.35)
Weekly Average Her Orgasms: 6.15 (+0.23)
Most Orgasmic Month (mode): TIED March/April (61)
Most Orgasmic Month (mean): June (2.00 orgasms/sexing)
His Most Orgasmic Month (mode): TIED March/April (31)
His Most Orgasmic Month (mean): TIED March, April, June, July, October (1.00 O/sexing)
Her Most Orgasmic Month (mode): TIED March/April (30)
Her Most Orgasmic Month (mean): June (1.00 O/sexing)
Top Types of Encounter: Bedtime (86.8%), Quickie (4.7%), Sexcapade (3.8%) Figure 3 - Types
Top Positions: Missionary (used 83.3% of the time), Prone (17.0%), Cunnilingus (10.8%), Cowgirl (7.6%) Figure 4 - Annual Positions | Figure 5 - Monthly Positions
Top Inclusions: Toys for Her (76), Cunnilingus (43), Fellatio (29), Massage (14) Figure 6 - Inclusions
Most Routine Month: December (93% Bedtime x 69% Only Missionary)
Least Routine: February (77% Bedtime x 46% Only Missionary)
Most Playful Month: February (toys used 12 occasions)
Most Used Toys: We-Vibe Melt (80x), “Old Faithful” 6" Dildo w/balls (20x), “8Ball” 8" Dildo w/balls" (6x); Womanizer Pro40 (5x)
Most Toys in a Single Sexing: May 21 - 11 toys (We-Vibe Melt, Womanizer Pro40, “Old Faithful” Dildo, Svakom Erica Vibrator, 8" Slim Silicone Dildo, Cuffs, Collar, Crop, Paddle, Flogger, 8" LH Silicone Dildo w/Balls)
Most Varied Positions Month: Here’s the space to wax long about how my system is wonky and I’m not sure what factors should be most considered. So here are some sub-results:
- Most Unique Positions: TIE February/April - 14 unique tags
- Most Total Positions: May - 52 total position tags
- Highest Average Positions: February - 1.92 positions/per encounter
- Most Positions in One Sexing: July 3 (prone, doggy, anal, facesitting, face-fucking, fellatio, cunnilingus, doggy, standing doggy)
- Highest Non-Missionary: July - 25% (7 of 28) encounters w/o Missionary Tag
- Highest & Lowest Missionary: September - 75% sex w/o other positions // February - 46% w/o other positions.
Kinkiest Month: February, as determined by my “Kinkometer” formula developed last year. Factors percent of positions used other than missionary; sex other than bedtime, midnight, or morning; daily average encounters, his and her orgasms; and finally multiplied by tallies for oral sex and toys as well as weighted tallies for anal, bondage, pegging, and role-play.
- Month began with me away for a week due to family emergency. Due to circumstances there was a mutually heightened sense of appreciation for each other and my have contributed to some of the variety/kink involved.
- Relatively average in terms of volume: 0.93 sex/day - until considering I was gone for 21% of the month. Knowing my actual schedule for that month, we actually had sex 1.18/available day - 4 days with two distinct encounters. Note: I cannot possibly start factoring in this data between my wife and I’s potential work and other obligation travel. I don’t think. Can I?
- Less Missionary accounted for only 43% of positions logged in February, however on closer review nearly a quarter of our sexings did not include Missionary at all. Note: this is still a data point I’m not sure how to best record and would need a proper data scientist to build me a better spreadsheet to do so.
- 23% sex w/o missionary, 2nd place behind July (25%) and August/December tied for third at 21%.
- 23% non-bedtime (October in 2nd at 19% and September at 17%)
- Notable inclusions: 8x toys for her, 4x toys for me, 5 cunnilingus, 4 fellatio - neither highs for the month, but notable - and 1 of 3 peggings.
- Celebration month: Obviously everyone gets Valentine’s Day in February, but it also includes a birthday for us and we have gotten to the point in our careers we can take each others’ birthdays off to play.
- Only noted occurrence of squirting for the year - the night I returned home and went down on her with good teasing and fingering. She had not been able to masturbate hardly at all in the week apart and I must have done a good job.
- Stress Release: February marked the beginning of disrupted predictability for the year due to the change in USA administration. Three of the four repeat sex days were midnight stress-related insomnia fucks.
The Annual Word Cloud: Changes to the position count (including all positions noted in use, not just primary/secondary positions that orgasms occurred) resulted in some changes to the top ten words this year.
Top 15 words are:
- Bedtime (298)
- Missionary (284)
- Melt (80) +1 spot
- Period (58) +1 spot
- Prone (58) -1 spot
- Cunnilingus (37) 1st Appearance
- Cowgirl (29)
- Doggy (20)
- Face-Fucking (20) 1st Appearance
- Old Faithful (18) 1st Appearance
- Mutual Masturbation 1st Appearance
- Plow 1st Appearance
- Quickie -5 spots
- Fellatio 1st Appearance
- Sexcapade -4 spots
CLOSING THOUGHTS
When @Peitho tagged me last week referencing my recaps, here was my response.
And I couldn’t necessarily have been any more wrong in predicting the results. The circumstances, on review, were rough. Kicked off with travel for family emergency in February with ramifications all year long, followed shortly by direct impact to livelihoods due to political administration change in the US. We trained for and ran a marathon together which was fantastic, but also exhausting and time consuming. We’re getting older and our bodies remind us regularly - especially her general fatigue and my occasional ED. Our weekends - which once upon a time allowed for entire days in bed - are now filled running in all directions after the kids’ activities and family obligations. There’s a little less time for play in general. We were not able to get away for any of the quick weekends that often rejuvenate our years.
On the other hand, challenges at work for her resulted in a travel moratorium and so she was home full-time from December 2024 until September 2025. We celebrated our 18th Wedding Anniversary this summer in the middle of a lovely family vacation stateside and successfully escaped for a too-short and long deferred weeklong European trip this fall. We remain madly in love and enjoy drowning in the heretofore unknown depths that only longevity of love bring. It remains a choice, every single day, a choice to continue sinking in the passion and commitment to each other and to our life together.
So it turns out that while it sure was a brutal year generally, our sex life did not suffer, nor did our relationship. Here are a few more random thoughts:
- Orgasm Gap: This year I orgasmed 96.7% of the time we had sex, while wifey had 94.4%. Last year was our closest to parity (96.3/95.4) but still higher than 2023 and 2024 which were both nearly 4 points apart. I don’t have anyway to note or prove it, but we do practice a “everyone who wants an orgasm gets to go for it” model. If wifey didn’t clock an orgasm during a session it’s by choice, not neglect. However most times that I don’t orgasm it’s due to ED or fatigue.
- While we’re on the topic of orgasms, One and Done: Only once this year did wifey log multiple orgasms in a session, way back in January. She finds they have diminishing returns and historically has felt pressured when I suggest it. We recently had a good conversation where she expressed interest in going multiple times for herself in the future as she feels I’ve recalibrated my understanding and role of multiples for her, so maybe that’s something to watch for in 2026 - but not, strictly speaking, a goal.
- And speaking of Erectile Difficulties: I had “ED” in the notes on 5 occasions. 2 of those occasions I didn’t orgasm, but the others we clearly carried through. But I also know just from scrolling through my list that there were plenty more occasions - usually during our sexcapades - that the erection waxes and wanes and you just can’t let it get in your head. So I’m not really sure what my criteria is for making note of it. We’re getting older. It happens. I’ve heard it said that the best sex happens when you recover well (I think) and that rings true, whether it’s taking a break to reset, focusing on pleasuring her for a while (without putting pressure on her), or even carrying on with soft-entry.
- Another note on Frequency: before pressing publish I reviewed last year’s post and saw that I noted in 2024 wifey and I had a combined 19 weeks of work travel that year, while this year we were both pretty grounded. She picked up a little at the end of the year with just three weeks away in the fall, while I was on the road for a family emergency 1 week. It raises a question for me in evaluating the annual and monthly trends - am I tracking and valuing the raw number of times we are able to connect sexually as a couple, or to I somehow also try to rate it as a value of availability? Just account for known travel separations that suddenly makes our 2024 weekly average 9.79/week (vs. the previously reported 6.21), while 2025 adjusts up to 6.96/week (from 6.56). And if it’s somehow adjusted based on availability, how does non-debilitating illness fit in? I noted a 3 day gap in our log last January, but neither of us were traveling. And then I remembered I got laid up with the flu for three days and couldn’t even think about sex. And do I adjust our June numbers to remove the nights we were sleeping in a tent with our children and didn’t even think about trying to sneak one in on the squeaky air mattress. So anyway - that seems like a pain the the butt and also feels like an additional pressure to “optimize” our available time which is not the point of this exercise at all. But maybe if travel picks up again it’s worth including adjusted numbers for comparison, if relevant. But then also would have to remove our video sex times and the circle begins.
And some more final thoughts on positions as I’ve been crunching the numbers…
The data out is only as good as the data in. In final review before posting I did discover a series of dates that were missing the manual entry of positions and so some “just missionary” numbers are wrong in the graphs, but reflected in my other averages/stats. Namely, I undercounted July representation of Missionary by 4 or 5 so that month is off. But it’s less than 1% of the total on the annual pie chart, so margin of error and all that.
As noted at the top I added a space to simply list any positions used during an encounter together. It has definitely led to an increased prominence of oral sex in the data as a position used - especially fellatio - as previously I was really only tagging primary and secondary positions based on priority to 1) did it lead to an orgasm for either or both of us; and 2) prominent time of use. I’m a hard cummer by oral so fellatio rarely showed up in my data as a position previously, but now any time my wife spends going down on me as foreplay gets tagged as time in fellatio.
Similarly it raises questions for me about what constitutes a “position” and how much variety should be tagged. Should a fellatio on laying in bed together be different from her on her knees? Our default missionary position involves my legs on the outside of hers, which many would call CAT, and regularly surfing in and out of being raised up on my knees supporting my weight on the headboard. I’ve continued to just refer to that everyday position series as Missionary. But we also sometimes spend time in traditional missionary (with me between her legs). How much time should be spent in these position before I give it a different name and tag it? Should I name every single position we pass through in our exploration?
On that note, I began to join my wife more regularly in yoga practice this year which resulted in my adopting some terms from yoga positions as we progressed. “Plow” doesn’t appear until April, with prominence through the summer and then is not tagged at all. I’m sure we used it prior, and have since. But it wasn’t top of mind as identifying. Same with what I named “Crab” where in missionary she wraps her legs around my waist and arms around my back. I love it so much that when I mentioned it she did it more regularly with intention and time for a spell. Tagged twice each in July and August, then not again until December. It’s another position that occurs multiple times a week at the beginning of our bedtime sex to connect and bond, but it’s usually just passing through as we get going so I don’t think to tag it.
Similarly running into other issues of consistency and I’ve already hit “print” on my graphs - we always have DP when we have anal, but I didn’t always flag DP as a position or note.
And then also wrestling with how to crunch the data I did put in as I figure out some of my stats like “most routine.” I really should go through and do a count for each month of how many of our sexings were exclusively missionary without a secondary position. But I don’t wanna! I’m tired of looking at the spreadsheets. Ugh. But maybe I will… (Note: I did go back and factor those numbers into some of the monthly figures.) Jeez, it’s exhausting being in this head of mine sometimes. I think it’s time to call it.
Data out is only as good as what you put in.
Many thanks to all forums who made it this far.
Did I miss anything? Questions? Comments? Concerns? Let me know in the replies!
Fair play for keeping a record and tracking everything - I’d forget after a few sessions 
