Painful sex after children

Sex Tips & Talk
1

Doggy used to be our most used and favourite position without a doubt! But since the birth of our second child 11 months ago Doggy is always painful . However much lube however much fore play.

Is it lost to us forever?

Missionary is fine no probs there.

Any advice would be great

Mrs TJ

2

Did you tear at childbirth? My Oh did and they didn't stitch her very well. Sex hurt. Didn't matter how much lube we used. She had to go back in hospital for an operation to repair the damage from stitching her first time round.

3

I was wondering about a tear as well, considering it's been quite a while since delivery. I'd go back to the doctor to have it checked out.

5

I'm very sorry to here this and like all the others you need to see your doctor and get him to refer you to a specialist.

I'm wondering as its only painful in your beloved doggy position if you've got an issue with your cervix post birth. Rear entry allows a much deeper penertration and the penis tip can come into contact with the cervix. Some women have a sensitive cervix any way and can find it uncomfortable to have it touched even without having children.

6

Thanks for the replies!

I did tear during the birth but only had a few stitches nothing major.

The pain is more internalikely than external if that makes sense.

But I think I will take a trip to the doctors just to be sure!

Thanks again

7

tj10699 wrote:

Thanks for the replies!

I did tear during the birth but only had a few stitches nothing major.

The pain is more internalikely than external if that makes sense.

But I think I will take a trip to the doctors just to be sure!

Thanks again

Let us know how you get on - it's always good to know how things work out. Hope all is fine xxxx

8

lovingnewtoys wrote:

tj10699 wrote:

Thanks for the replies!

I did tear during the birth but only had a few stitches nothing major.

The pain is more internalikely than external if that makes sense.

But I think I will take a trip to the doctors just to be sure!

Thanks again

Let us know how you get on - it's always good to know how things work out. Hope all is fine xxxx

+1

9

Good luck with the Dr. Always best to get checked out 😘

10

Doggy style positions tend to make deep penetration easier because the position itself shortens your vaginal canal. If your cervix has dropped slightly post-childbirth due to a weakened pelvic floor, it could be this that's causing the pain. 

The likelihood is that your partner is now making direct / stronger impact with your cervix than he was able to before when you have sex in this position. 

As the others have said, a trip to the docs sounds like a good idea to be sure there are no underlying issues - you should never ignore pain - but I'd take a hefty bet that the above is the issue if you're able to enjoy sex in other posisions. 

Out of interest, if you lift your legs onto his shoulders during missionary, do you experience the same pain? (This position also shortens the vaginal canal so could produce a similar sensation.) 

Have you tried doing pelvic floor exercises since you gave birth?

If not, I would suggest doing them anyway as they're brilliant for all vaginal health. I reconnebt mentioning this to your GP when you speak to them and ask if they think kegel exercises would help. 

Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles will help everything lift back into its original place and will also help you climax faster and stronger (bonus!).  

Good luck at the docs! 

11

I agree with what Jess has said.

I had minor scar tissue which was very sensitive for just over a year, just keep in mind if you do have scar tissue that it can take longer to calm down. I did get checked by the GP and they told me to sit in warm baths with salt to help reduce the pain etc. There are so many things it can be it's always worth checking with your GP.

12

All the good advice has been given.

I hope you Dr can sort things out for you and things can get back to being enjoyable x

13

I'm 11 months postpartum and I suffered a second degree tear which is still quite sensitive. I find it impossible to do doggy, we've only just managed to work up to doing cowgirl and missionary without too much pain. I do feel more sensitive internally as well, so I can't have rough sex anymore (at the moment). I am noticing a steady improvement, so hopefully (as I've been told) it just takes a long time for some people to recover.

When you say the pain is internal, you're not having any problems with your scarring at all then? Is it more of a deep pelvic pain or tenderness in the vaginal walls?