OK I'm just after a bit of advice;
My son (7) has NEVER slept through the night, he's now taking melaonin so he can fall asleep, but he will still wake up 7-8 times a night. (I'm Knackered!)
He keeps getting in my bed, and when he is in my bed with me he will sleep though. But I need him to stop getting in my bed with me. My back is killing me every morning from sleeping in a weird position - because even though he is small he takes up most of the bed!
When he wakes me up when he comes in the room at night, I tell him to get back in his own bed. This will start a fight at stupid AM where he gets all mad; I ignore that and tell him to sleep in his own bed. My problem is that when I'm still asleep he will come in and get in my bed.
I think I am giving him mixed messages; but I'm not sure how to stop it. I sleep walk, sleep talk - And will do pretty much everything in my sleep - ranging from doing the washing! And cleaning the house, you name it I do it. On the nights that I assume I didn't wake when he's come in, I have woken (The OH has told me) - That I let my son in to the bed, I'll give him a cuddle, a kiss and sing him back to sleep -Sigh-
Now I have no idea how to get him to sleep and wake up in his own bed! And how I can have a full nights sleep!
My daughter(9) is ADHD and was prescribed melatonin but it does nothing for her in terms of getting to sleep(so we stopped using it), she can also go with little sleep in general(doesn't eat much, tall and thin/normal), she often climbs into our sons bed, but it may be that she gets cold after throwing off the quilt, it might be wrong in some peoples eyes but she has her own tv/sky box so at least if she wakes she can watch that at any time rather than wake the rest of us.
It's what is waking him up that needs to be looked at then maybe go from there, is he a only child? maybe lonely or afraid on his own? ask for a referral from your gp to see a specialist sleeping disorder person and don't be put off with the "he'll just grow out of it" saying.
There maybe a genetic link if you sleepwalk etc. what were you like at his age and or your partner interms of sleeping?
If he gets into your bed what happens if you go sleep in his? does he come back.
He also has ADHD and ASC. In general he just needs little sleep, without the melatonin he would drift off to sleep between 10pm-midnight and still constantly wake up. With it, he can easily drift off to sleep, but it won't keep him asleep (and it's not designed for that)
He is an only child, but he isn't lonely or afraid, he doesn't really get scared of anything, and in terms of lonliness (With the ASC) he prefers his own company and can be quite volitile when other children are around in his personal space.
I can't get in his bed with him, it's one of those cabin beds and I'm too tall for it lol. So there's no room when I pull my knees up for the both of us.
When he gets in my bed, he'll talk to himself - do math sums ect, until he falls back asleep. Which can be an hour or so afterwards, once he's in with me though he will stay asleep. He does talk in his sleep. Maybe it will have to be a case of seeing a specialist for sleeping.
Even when he's awake though he's very 'mummy mummy' he doesn't like other people, well... I guess doesn't like is a strong word, but he doesn't build up emotional attachments to other people like other children do. Things don't affect him the same way, for instance we had a dog, whilst he was away the dog passed away, when he came back the dog was just gone - It's very black and white with him. The dog was there, now it's not. Doesn't get upset over it, doesn't show any form of being bothered. Now if it were an object. His game or anything else of his, that would bother him. I'm the only one he seems to have an emotional attachment to, if I leave a room he follows, if I go to the bathroom, he sits outside - So I don't know if it's an overly attached thing, as he says he wants to sleep with me because he doesn't like being away from me - Or if it's a sleeping thing.
Either way, I'm knackered! lol
We have had the same problem with our daughter and she's six tomorrow.
We started using something called 'good girl beads' about a year ago to reward good behaviour. Basically, if she sleeps in her own bed all through the night, she gets to put a bead in her 'good girl cup'. What happens then is that whenever she wants something: let's say a Monster High DVD for a tenner; we tell her that she needs ten beads to 'buy' it.
Having something in mind for the future - a definite reward that's not too far away and not too difficult to attain - seems to really have worked for her.
It's not foolproof - she'll still occassionally wander into us - but it's night and day to what it was.
Might be worth a thought? Either way, I hope you get it sorted. I know your pain. ;p
I had this problem when I was a kid, I was very close with my mum but not anyone else. I've recently been told I have ADHD, or asperges, they're very similar. I was like it up until I was about 13 then I lost all closeness with my mum. I can't stand to touch anyone including my mum. He may not end up the same, I can't really give any advice from a parents point of view but having ADHD it's hard to show or speak about emotion, just because he doesn't show it doesn't mean he doesn't feel it. Usually when a kid wants to sleep with their mum it's comes from fear or loneliness. Is your OH his dad? Sorry there's no real advice, just Insight from a kid with ADHD, the more you push him the harder it'll be on him, he'll grow out of it on his own eventually
My son is on the Autistic Spectrum and what you're describing in terms of his attachment behaviour is very similiar to how my son reacts and responds to me. Won't really pay attention to other people but will listen to me etc.
He has similar problems with his sleeping pattern, though he no longer comes into our room or want to get into bed getting him settled down for the evening can be a real issue. He will be out of his room constantly bugging his sister, running around upstairs or singing the bubble guppies theme at the top of his voice!
He wakes up as and when he wants, he's not very consistant and can be up at any time of the night and be as awake as if he had had a full nights sleep. We use a picture timetable system with him that he has to follow as he is a real stickler for routine, change it and you are in for a fight! Since using it though he has been a lot more consistent in his behaviour, even staying in his room a whole lot more during the night.
Now that I think about it my daughter does not like it if we're both out, she's not too bad about it though, she just plays club penguin until we get back, try to get some expert advice, it'll probably help both of you.
My 7 yr old is on the severe end of ASD. Tbh, the meds given are just to help them to sleep and won't keep them asleep. I've tried everything from a strong antihystemin to meletonin(sp?).
In the end it was a very heavy blanket that kept him asleep. I really would invest in a heavy/weighted type blanket. It doesn't have to be specifically made, as the one I use is a throw from BHS but it is really heavy and was my winter topper. I accidently came across this life saver and it still works.
I have heard an alternative view that gluten can cause these kinds of behavioural problems in children that otherwise show no sign of intolerance.
Thanks for the suggestions! When I'm at his next appointment with CAMHs I think I'll bring it up! x
i try to cut gluten out of my son's diet, mainly bread, it has a slight change for the better. but i think it only really works if you cut gulten out full stop?