At some point all couples go through the "tell me about your past sex life" conversation. Would you or have you been brutally honest and told everything in the belief that you should have no secrets between you? If your partner has done the same has a revelation caused you to feel jealous, uneasy, inadequate etc. Have you pressed for the grisly details knowing that you have to know but at the same time you would rather not know?
Has either of your revelations caused an actual problem between you because one of you can not cope with the details of the other's past?
If you have experienced any of the above, how do you cope with the knowledge, how do you deal with it?
When Mr.Naughty revealed that in the past, not only had he shagged Mrs.N's best friend, but had, at different times had torrid affairs with both her mother and her father, Mrs. N didn't take the news too well, as she set off for the tool shed muttering something about an axe. Well, the last bit may only be partially true, we'll leave it to you to wonder which bit it is! Ha ha!
In a loving adult relationship past lives should not matter to either party and any issues on that subject should be sorted at the start its part of them so get to know them before you invest your time in them .
If I understand you correctly you are saying that your hubby has had sex with your mother and father or is it your friends mom and pop then I would put that into the world of the very strange and would run a mile from that one ! Shiver !!!
I know about mr PA's previous partners, and one of those in particular was very hurtful due to her involvement with my Step-father (they'd had a long affair). I asked, he told me, and I wish I had never asked but I needed to know if he had actually slept with her.
He doesn't ask about my past partners, he knows some of them as some have remained friends with me, but he doesn't ask for numbers and he isn't bothered.
Expert, the paragraph you are referring to was somewhat tongue in cheek, however Mr.N does find Mrs.N's granny quite alluring...especially when she takes her teeth out!!
I'm always honest and want honesty in return. I only have three partners but am happy if the bloke has many more. (always fine if he's bi) I suppose I'd be upset if he'd treated any of them badly because he might do the same to me, or if I knew any of them and it came as a shock. I think I'm pretty chilled though.
I think past lives are exactly that "the past". I've never really wanted to delve too deeply but of course ex's crop up in some conversations as long as you talk about them in a light-hearted manner I don't think it should cause any jealousy. After all people who have come and gone in your life goes someway into shaping us into the people we are today.
ive been half honest with my current partner about my past sex life, some things i would just rather forget about so i havent bothered telling him them, he would probably get a bit grumpy or jelous, so there are things better left unsaid to him.
If I divulged absolutely everything in one go the accumulated list would probably make me sound like an utter pervert and folks would run a mile. In reality though, experiences and tastes change, so at any given time I'm actually quite normal and un threatening to a partner. Probably.
@ xmellx, you can tell us sweetie, we wouldn't tell him. We find it's best in these situations to get it off your chest in really lurid, graphic detail - so come on, out with it, what have you been up to in the past?
@ BBG..."probably." ??????!!!!! Hmmmm. We think that says enough really.
If I divulged absolutely everything in one go the accumulated list would probably make me sound like an utter pervert and folks would run a mile. In reality though, experiences and tastes change, so at any given time I'm actually quite normal and un threatening to a partner. Probably.
Depends on the partner, surely?!
I think you just have to use common sense and judge your parter's attitudes. There's no point in telling them you once had a orgy with some trannys and a goat if it was a one-time thing and not an ongoing fetish, especially if you know it's going to make them run a mile... as far as obligations go, I'd say the only things you need to disclose to a partner are things that are going to affect your relationship, sexually or otherwise.
It generally dosent bother me, but my curent partner did make a point once on how it was "quality" when he took some girl back to his dads and was at it with her and how in the morning his dad was horrified that he had took someone back that he didnt know...And then when we went to visit procided to bring it up.
Also at his mothers she was on about a few of his x's which didnt bother me till she started to say how poliet and nice alot of them was each mentioning by name and what made them so kind...Which made things a bit aquard for me and upsetting.
But generally i dont think its too much of a problem till it over steps the line, like above thats things you dont need to hear...