Hi, so a little background, my husband has always been a little reserved, a bit vanilla in the bedroom but satisfying. We have been together 9 years and married 6 and have 2 children. Over the course of our relationship ive loosened him up a bit and introduced little things like spanking, tying up, blindfolding, mutual masturbation. Recently I found my butt plug in the bathroom and asked him why it was there, he admitted he had been curious after that area normally being strictly exit only, he said he’d lubed it up and popped it in and actually quite liked the feeling.
Now I get off on watching men having pleasure whether that be alone or with women or another man, a man moaning really gets me going, I was watching some pegging videos and sent him one that was quite tame and sensual of a woman giving it to her husband. To my surprise he is interested in trying it!
He did say we will need to build up though, more use of the butt plug, small toys etc. What would people recommend for anal play leading up to pegging, and has anyones partner been a bit reserved and then tried pegging. Did they enjoy it?
Maybe try some prostate massages with fingers, me and my partner started like that and after buying myself buttplugs and toys to stretch myself privately she can use those on me and fist me. Start small and work up.
Hey @Rebekah29, @ToysForDays has nailed it. Patience is the key, obviously the more you do it the easier it becomes. Practice makes perfect so to speak. Also start with what you guys think is comfortable there are some great reviews left by many of the people who use lovehoney that me and my wife found really helpful on the strapon pages. We started with a small butt plug and slowly made our way up from butt plugs to strapon dildos and been pegging for 12 years now. We use the briefs as opposed to a harness as wife finds these more comfortable but the ring isnt suitable for a dildo that has a large suction cup.
@Rebekah29 this Glass dildo is great because it’s super slippery and you can flip it round and use the large bead handle part to insert when you are ready to go bigger. Working you way up through a number of fingers at a time is a good way to start to increase anal play, as you will be able to feel his anal muscle and how relaxed he is there. Plus you will enjoy the sensation too, it’s nice to feel your fingers inside him, at least I love to feel it anyway.
As said above, start small and slow and work your way up to a size you are comfortable with. It will not take that long before he is a gibbering wreck spread out, face down on the bed, with your toy of choice buried into his nether region. When you have withdrawn and after about 10 minutes he’ll say “When can we try this again?”.
I’m in the same boat, we’ve tried a lot of toys and lube but is there any toys out there that start off small and gradually build up the Girth. Just so it slowly stretches
I’d also encourage him to use the dildo on himself first, that could be completely alone or with you watching (as to learn how he enjoys it). That way he’ll be more relaxed that he is in control of the process and become accustomed to it in his own time. It may be that you start to work the dildo manually with your hand before you put it in a harness.
I’d also add a bit of positive reinforcement when hes doing it (or if he tells you about it later), that you find it a turn-on etc. A butt plug is one thing, but a penis shaped dildo can be a completely different kettle of fish for men to accept that they enjoy using without being a threat to their masculinity.
Same as everyone else though, start small, use lube often and take your time.