Hi I’m leah I’ve been looking through the forums for a while now and seen so many helpful people and I’m hoping someone can help me please this is my first post too.
So me and my oh have been together for 12 years we were each other’s first we love doing all sorts of things including using toys etc switching positions and oral but I just can’t do with the sight or feel of cum on me or in my mouth it makes me gag but I love to give my partner head and I want to be so much better with it but we always finish with sex instead as he knows how it makes me feel so I really need help on what to do and how to control my gag reflex better a be able to give decent head 
So and advice/ tips would be amazing right now thank you.
4 Likes
Hi, welcome to the forum.
sorry not able to help, but ive tweaked your thread title so you should hopefully get more answers 
Having a dig through the forum is always a good idea, gag reflex and swallowing cum come up pretty regularly on here so if you have look you should find some stuff.
1 Like
Maybe the answer isn’t in learning to be better at something that makes you uncomfortable? If you really enjoy giving him head, but don’t like the feeling of him cumming in your mouth, then perhaps it belongs a foreplay and after that you move to PIV sex? My partner loves giving oral for example but can’t stand the idea of a facial, because she finds it degrading. I respect that entirely, so it’s something we don’t do. Maybe it’s the same for you and your partner with cumming in your mouth?
But if you genuinely do want to get past that feeling, I’m sure there are plenty of friendly experts on here who can offer some tips 
10 Likes
Hi @Leah94 ,don’t stress too much, your not alone. My OH is exactly like you. Giving me a BJ does wonders to her libido (that struggles at times) but when it comes to my point of no return, I have to give her a warning then finish inside her.
We learnt the hard way a long time ago (20yrs) that she has a poor gag reflex, after a BJ she vomited over me LOL. Love her to bits, love oral sex to start but being greedy I always finish deep inside her.
We’ve accepted that I can’t cum in her mouth, no big issue.
Sorry can’t help with improving your gagging, just want you to know your not alone. All the best on your quest 
6 Likes
Could you not use condoms? That way you can fully focus on giving the blow job without having to worry about him finishing as it will be in the condom rather than directly in your mouth. You could even learn to put the condom on with your mouth.
Otherwise, it’s about conditioning yourself to get over the dislike of cum, if that’s what you really want to do. Do you think you’d be able to let him cum somewhere on your body, like your stomach or thigh? Somewhere that isn’t too close to your face. Not necessarily the full load to start with, maybe just the last dribble. Then build up to more and other areas just to make yourself more comfortable with cum generally.
If you really want to be able to swallow without the cum being in your mouth too much, the best way is to take him as far as you can in your mouth with your head tilted back to get your throat as straight as possible. That way, you won’t get much cum in your mouth, if any at all.
My only other suggestion would be to look for a squirting/ejaculating dildo. Something like this or these which you could practice giving blow jobs on and they’d ejaculate when you are ready (as you control it)
6 Likes
Alternatively you could be ontop and angle it so he comes on himself instead of on you
6 Likes
Hi @Leah94 welcome to the forum.
I also have struggled swallowing my husband’s cum without wanting to gag. Recently I set myself a goal of trying to overcome this. I started off with giving him a BJ and hand job together (I can’t deep throat) then he would cum on his stomach and I dipped my finger in to start getting used to the taste.
The next time I licked his cock a couple of times as he cum, so I got more in my mouth but the rest on his stomach. I continued this until I was able to lap up the lot 
and swallow between licks. Somehow this is less overwhelming than taking a full load in my mouth at once. We both seem to be satisfied with this and I definitely think it is possible to get used to it with practise, if that’s what you want to do.
5 Likes
I agree with all the comments so far, using toys, condoms or not swallowing at all. If it is something you want to get over you can work towards it but if it is a hard no for you, you and your partner can compromise on something else. We all have sexual goals but stay comfortable and don’t stress!
1 Like
Check out this thread!
1 Like
Think there’s been something like this before on the forum and people have suggested experimenting firstly to build up a tolerance but also try using the cum textured lube to get used to the feel of it on you and in mouth or even try out types of food that has a similar texture that you enjoy eating and then gradually it’ll train your mind to see cum as an ok thing
2 Likes
Injaculation! I had a girlfriend who was the same, so she loved the idea of blowjobs, and as any typical man would, I enjoyed them too. It was always nice to finish inside her, but she wanted to make me orgasm while she was sucking.
After reading a couple of articles, I found that the taoists had a method of retaining the semen in the body during orgasm, so we tried it. I could either reach down and apply pressure to my perineum during orgasm, or if I told her I was cumming, she could.
Try it while you’re masturbating or getting a hand job, then try during oral once you’ve perfected the technique.
It was just as nice for me, and made giving blowjobs pleasant for her, happy happy!
4 Likes
In my experience, horniness makes a huge difference. A long foreplay is probably the best way to go, after that you might try the thing with tolerance, but I doubt that it’s going to be enjoyable to both of you. If you can’t stand the taste, smell, texture or any combination of that, it’s just not worth the struggle, at least it wasn’t for me.
2 Likes
Hello and welcome 
I tend to let him cum quite deep in my mouth so it’s already basically at the back of my mouth and then just swallow. I don’t have to really deal with the taste then.
6 Likes
@Leah94 Being a straight man and never having given oral to a man nor have had a penis explode cum in my mouth, I can’t speak to the experience. I do know that there are alot of people on here that love cum (the taste, texture, temperature, smell, etc.)
I also know that my “pre-cum” is absolutely crystal clear and I can pump out a bunch of it at a fairly consistent and quantifiable rate. It also tastes very different from my actual orgasm cum. In fact, my wife will squeeze the end of my penis, forcing the clear liquid out and take it in her fingers and lick it off. She sometimes sticks her fingers in my mouth after they have been in hers. Sometimes I will take this same clear fluid and straddling her, will milk my cock onto her nipples. I will let it sit there and cool for a few seconds and then touch my finger to her nipple and lift it up where there remains a sticky string.
By lowering the string back onto her hard nipple it creates a cold sensation that she loves. If i then lick her tits I can taste myself and I was always impressed by the way I tasted… 
Does anyone else have the same experience with the difference in the pre-cum and orgasm cum? Which do you prefer?
So maybe the orgasm cum isn’t for you. I posted previously that my OH loves when I blow on her tits as opposed to in her mouth. I’m ok with that as I’m not sure I would want a mouthful of “squirt” from a woman in my mouth either (but I would be willing to give it a try… just saying 
).
Enjoy it and don’t feel that this is a deal breaker by any means. You like what you like and you need to feel the same enjoyment.
3 Likes
Welcome @Leah94
1 Like
@Leah94 why don’t you go to #inside-lovehoney. It will let you learn alot
1 Like
You could also go down an alternative route, and make your partner swallow their own. If they’re leaning horizonally down (kind of like a handstand) you can make them finish all over themselves, or instruct them to aim for their own mouth.
Then they just have to tell you when theyre about to ejaculate and stop a few seconds early and finish the final few pumps with a hand.
1 Like
Hi Leah maybe look into this # Sensuva Deeply Love You Throat Relaxing Spray Salted Caramel 30ml I myself personally haven’t tried it but if I’m being completely honest… I was looking into it and considering it but one night I was giving my partner head and the unexpected happen… he blew in my mouth and I was pleasantly surprised!! It was different! I took it like a woman and let it dribble down the side of my mouth and I swear this sent a shiver down his spine. A new experience for us both… me actually taking the load and for him actually seeing his missus of nearly 12 years doing this. You and me have a lot in common… been with our partners for 12 years and trying new things and a fear of cum. But as people we grow, and it’s about baby steps… I remember a time when he would have to give me the “warning” and I’d finish him with my hand… but with this also being said, I think I reached a point in our sex life that he’d been so understanding regarding this certain situation that it maybe time I repay him by trying and seeing where it went… and ok I don’t think I’ll be swallowing anytime soon but it’s definitely a curve ball we all face and however you take it is up 2 you but if you want 2 improve for him… baby steps and you’ll get there!! Good luck hun x
2 Likes
I always seem to cum fast when getting a bj so my wife usually edges me on and drives me crazy stopping and going til she deep throats it and I cum
1 Like
Hi @Leah94 and welcome to the forum.
The game changing advice I can give you is make a fist with your left hand, while clenching your thumb.
I hope that makes sense as this helps control your gag reflex.
It doesn’t work with everybody but it may work for you.
Good luck
1 Like