Lately I have been feeling as though my Sexual Spark has just been a bit… quiet. Being single doesn’t really help it.
So… do you have some tips or advice how to get the spark a little more charged?
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Here are some tips that have worked for some folks.
New clothing/wardrobe (it’s less about that, rather it’s about making a change).
Exercising. Not saying you or any who do this needs to change the way their body looks, that’s not the point. Movement, exercise, walking and such really helps folks mental state improve.
Again, I’m not mentioning this about the way you look (I have zero clue about how you look so of course I’m not bringing this up for that reason).
"Exercise acts as a powerful, immediate cognitive and emotional booster. It enhances mood, sharply reduces anxiety, and triggers the release of endorphins and endocannabinoids "
Exercise helps our emotional state and our mental state too.
The Link Between Exercise and Mental Health
Physical activity improves mental health
So, whatever reason a person is feeling down, or blah, exercise will help them with respect to that.
“In addition to the apparent physical health benefits, physical activity also affects mental health positively.”
How does exercise improve mental health?
Exercise is not just about aerobic capacity and muscle size. Sure, exercise can improve your physical health and your physique, trim your waistline, improve your sex life, and even add years to your life. But that’s not what motivates most people to stay active.
People who exercise regularly tend to do so because it gives them an enormous sense of well-being. They feel more energetic throughout the day, sleep better at night, have sharper memories, and feel more relaxed and positive about themselves and their lives. And it’s also a powerful medicine for many common mental health challenges.
Regular exercise can have a profoundly positive impact on depression, anxiety, and ADHD. It also relieves stress, improves memory, helps you sleep better, and boosts your overall mood. And you don’t have to be a fitness fanatic to reap the benefits. Research indicates that modest amounts of exercise can make a real difference.
So when a person is feeling like a spark of any kind is missing in their life, I wholeheartedly suggest exercising as one way to help combat that.
It really does help a person’s mental wellbeing and improves their outlook about things overall.
I’m 58. I’m not a model, never have been and never will be. I’ve never been on TV, on a magazine cover etc. I don’t exercise regularly to look a certain way. I do it so I may age well and I do it because I feel much better overall, my outlook, my mental state are all much better due to exercising regularly.
It helps me to be the best me I may be, for others and for myself. I love my wife and I love my children. I want to be the best me I may be for them and exercise is one great way for me to do that for them.
“Yes, exercise is an incredibly effective stress reliever. It helps by lowering the body’s stress hormones (like cortisol and adrenaline) and triggering the release of endorphins—your brain’s natural mood elevators and painkillers.”
Life is stressful. Exercise is a great way to deal with stress. Lot’s of info about that online so I won’t keep copying and pasting info on that.
The benefits of exercising are almost too many to list. It doesn’t have to cost money either. Folks may just go for regular daily walks.
Whatever you choose to do to combat this loss of spark, I wish you well doing it.
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As HermanHuge mentioned, some new clothes or something nice for yourself that makes you feel better helps. I am a HUGE proponent of regular exercise. Things that get you moving, your heart rate up and muscles pumping does wonders. I exercise a minimum of 1 hour a day, most, an hour an a half, plus Tac-Chi and whatever we do else like a walk or ride our bikes, our favorite outdoor activity. Just being out in the sunshine will lift your mood. You could also combine activities, go to a park and bring an erotic novel to read would be nice. Another thing to try, spend time enjoying a nice bath, relaxing in the warm water, let your mind drift, and caress your body in ways that feel good. Take a spa day, get a nice massage, things that make you feel nice. Good luck, I hope you get more energized.
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Sexting will brighten my spark when/if I can find someone to play with. (The "no contact rule here makes me sigh from time to time.) Just having that mind connection and perhaps sharing things that are hard to speak of can help to wake you up.
Lying on the grass, soaking up the sun usually does it for me. Touching nature.
Or browse LHs shop and treat yourself .. or try doing that somewhere different that feels a little naughty, like Amazon. Put a toy in your basket along with your poetry books, yogurt covered cranberries and socks. Or try one of the more hardcore BDSM shops and get something really extreme. The thrill of waiting for its delivery can be all it takes.
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Some great tips there @I_ll_try_anything
And you get an A plus for including yogurt, in or on anything as I love yogurt!
I’m confused about the socks part though honestly.
I get the “yogurt covered cranberries” but not the “and socks” part.
Maybe I’m missing something being American as I do find that some of the lingo many of you from England use is something that takes me a bit to follow or catch onto.
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For some reason over the years I’ve come to rely on getting socks for birthdays/Christmas to keep my draw stocked up. Over time they’ve morphed into the same colour of the same brand and while its great for my ND brain to not have to think about it, I wanted something different for a recent holiday. I don’t leave the house much these days so it was easier to find some on Amazon than brave going shopping.
And again due to my brain I’ve a habit of buying random unrelated things at the same time.
“some of the lingo many of you from England use is something that takes me a bit to follow or catch onto”
“socks” .. the cloth bags that go on your feet to prevent your shoes from rubbing and, if you’re in England, prevent frostbite.
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Thank you.
Nothing wrong with buying random unrelated things at the same time.
Agree with ya shopping via Amazon than having to go out. I much prefer supporting local and I/we do many times, but it’s so darn easy to press a button and have an item show up the next day at your doorstep.
I think I just may have heard about those socks things:)
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My spark goes through dips and dives constantly being single and living in the family home still… can’t quite think of any ideas as yet but maybe some flirty sexting with people might do something to ignite it again? 