After mulling over some of the comments I'm now considering writing longer reviews. š¤
@Gentleman with lady
Scrolling through hundreds of reviews 5 at a time is definitely laborious. Hopefully you can use the Top Tip in the previous post to cut some of that out in the future.What a great idea, Ian Chimp! 
What does everyone look for when you're reading reviews? Depends on the item. First, I look at the pros/cons and the overall impression. I want to know how using the item feels, as well as of any problems or complaints. For lingerie I am looking for feedback on sizing and how it fits.
Which bits do you consider waffle and which real gems? I don't need to read a paragraph on how safely the items were packed and how the package was delivered discreetly. The rare real gem is when someone gives me a new idea on how to use an item. For example, someone wrote how they used a dildo to train on deepthroating. I had not thought of this before, haha!
Do you trust reviews from a certain reviewer more than others? Nope. I rarely ever check the profile or the reviewer and their other reviews.... although I shoulnd, in hindsight.
What items do you prefer reviewing? I want to review each and every single item I have used. However, I prefer versatile items (I love giving ideas as much as I enjoy being inspired by other's creativity) and sets (so I can write about each item separately, as well as about how they all work together).
What do you think is important to include when you're writing them? Experience: are you a beginner or a veteran? Lingerie: fitting, sizing, your size, material and build quality.
How long is a good review length? 200 - 300 words.
Is anyone aiming to win review of the month? No, but it would be nice if I won! Congrats to Jezebella =)
Do you feel that you have to review everything you buy? I don't feel I 'have' to, but I want to.
How long do you use a toy/outfit/etc out for before you review? It depends on the item and varies from one (good, long) use to well more than a year.
You did get runner-up this month, so that's something. Congratulations. ššSmultron wrote:
Is anyone aiming to win review of the month? No, but it would be nice if I won! Congrats to Jezebella =)
Ian Chimp wrote:
You did get runner-up this month, so that's something. Congratulations. šš
Oh wow, sweet! Just checked the blog, I had no idea. Thank you! =)
Thank you.
I see the following a fair bit;
Mentioning the smell of a toy, before washing it. - I don't get this at all. If you've washed it, and it still smells rubbery fair enough but if it's literally come straight out of a factory and you don't wash it... What do you expect ?!?!?
Bonus points for leaving a negative tag in the review for the smell, but mentioning the smell went away after a wash in the main body of the review - I see this a fair bit and I just don't understand why.
Reviewing something you ordered in the wrong size. - People do this. Why not talk to the lovely and brilliant CS department? - They're so helpful.
Seriously, if you have any issues chat to them before leaving an unfair review of a product.
SlimeCoveredCow wrote:
I see the following a fair bit;
(Mentioning the smell of a toy, before washing it) - I don't get this at all. If you've washed it, and it still smells rubbery fair enough but if it's literally come straight out of a factory and you don't wash it... What do you expect ?!?!?
Bonus points for leaving a negative tag in the review for the smell, but mentioning the smell went away after a wash in the main body of the review - I see this a fair bit and I just don't understand why.
(Reviewing something you ordered in the wrong size) - People do this. Why not talk to the lovely and brilliant CS department? They're so helpful.
Seriously, if you have any issues chat to them before leaving an unfair review of a product.
I've read a few reviews where people have had a faulty toy and reviewed their experience rather than the toy itself. I think they're written out of frustration a lot of the time, and you're right, they'd have been better off contacting Customer Care but I think they're usually written by people who don't know how good Lovehoney customer service is.
For the wrong size issue I can actually find them quite useful sometimes. Obviously if they've bought or been sent completely the wrong size then that's no good, but if they bought it thinking it would be correct and found it doesn't fit right for whatever reason then that can save me some hassle (for instance knowing that a particular pair of stockings in the base-size are shorter than average means that I can try buying the plus-size ones).
The wrong size point I've ordered befoee an item I would normally buy in plus size - for example most recent plus size lace gloves which I had purchased in the sizing I would always. I gave an honest review about only just fitting and in collaration to my sizing this way people of a plus size would know the fitting issues before purchasing
Cb1987 wrote:
The wrong size point I've ordered befoee an item I would normally buy in plus size - for example most recent plus size lace gloves which I had purchased in the sizing I would always. I gave an honest review about only just fitting and in collaration to my sizing this way people of a plus size would know the fitting issues before purchasing
Fair enough, it's worth a mention in situations like that. Sadly though, the problem is some people will post 1-star reviews with sizing issues before talking to LH Customer Service. It's just one of those things I guess.
I will reply in depth later but just wanted to say great topic to point people to and briefly my absolute pet peeveā¦
If reviewing lingerieā¦ what size AND shape are you AND what size did you order? Where did it fit well and where was it a bit off? So many people donāt include these things and it drives me mad, a , āIt fit really wellā with no additional information is not helpful! 
Okay, I may be falling foul of this one. 
My opening blurb for lingerie:
Mrs Chimp is a size 14/36B, 5ā 6" with a 32-inch waist and 39-inch hips, and we bought the (eg large)
Should I be including something else?
And before we go too deep, what does everybody want out of this topic? (re: the comments in Reviews of the Month).
Iāve re-read this topicās past comments and theyāre actually pretty review generic. Do you want to keep it like that, or would people like a change to specific review feedback?
And if so, would people like to do that here, or have a shiny fresh one? A fresh one would allow the first post to have some guidelines/parameters in so itās not a free-for-all (as we donāt want to upset anybody).
Any thoughts?
I guess stating the vital statistics, body type and height is useful. As is stating how an item fits, as the gap between size 8 and 16 is quite big, would a plus size 18 fit better? Etc. As no two bodies are identical, itās little details that help you to make a decision.
@Ian_Chimp I think this is a brilliant idea 
A place where people can ask for review advice and also what people ānicelyā think of their reviews and how they could possibly be bettered, or even if someone just feels they want to share one of their reviews with others 
No, this is perfect!
Sorry, I should have been clearer but it was a quick lunch break post. If youād just said Mrs Chimp is a size 14 thatās not overly helpful as it encompasses an awful lot of different body shapes but the measurements, height and cup size perfectly state what I meant by āshapeā.
Your statement is exactly what Iām looking for when Iām interested in lingerie and how it would fit me so thank you! 
I think this is a thread more suited to general review observations and preferences. So not naming any names.
I think a new thread where people can put themselves out there to get specific feedback about their own reviews will be more personal and helpful for them. A place to give and receive feedback for certain users or reviews.
I look for this more now too. I find it can give me a feel for the reviewerās experience level, and that helps me filter out any āenthusiasm boostā the toy may be getting.
(and Iām hoping quoting K&c30ās will entice him out of hidingā¦ )
I feel like no toy or garment is absolutely perfect but newbie reviewers or those that have been āgiftedā something for review might be more inclined to say that it is in case they donāt get asked to review again. I used to be the same but am now a bit more mean less of a brown noser in my reviews.
@Ian_Chimp - I agree with your new thread idea.
Iām more interested in the negatives, too. Sometimes it makes me more willing to buy the toy. Complaints of āthis dildo is way too bigā definitely peak my interest.
@VanillaWithSprinkles - Agreed. In my day job, Iām literally paid to find flaws and provide feedback on how to improve things. Sometimes I think this bleeds over into my reviews and Iām being too nit-picky or harsh. Itās hard to get out of that critical mindset when youāre doing it all day, though 
Though I think thereās an inherent excitement about sex toys (and your first tester items) that naturally buoys you up and makes you feel far more positive about the item. Plus inexperience plays a part too. I can remember us getting all giddy over something that turned out to be quite dull. I think we were swept away by the possibilities, and that clouded our objectivity somewhat.
Ha. āThis dildo is super weird and misshapen! It looks like someone left all their easter eggs next to the radiator, and then tried to reshape the mess into a Bugs Bunny bobble-head . Definitely too much for meā
Add to basket 
āWhat kind of weirdo came up with this monstrosity?ā
I donāt know, but Iām the kind of weirdo who will buy it 