Hi all
Have found out in the last month that my wife is pregnant. Its great!
Am i being selfish in feeling neglected in the bedroom now she is pregnant or is this normal?
I know she is very tired. .. and I want to be supportive.
For those of you with children
How do you fit in sex with a new born? And when they get older. ..
What about during pregnancy?
Tips and advice welcome. ..
So excited about the future
I don't have children myself - but just wanted to say Congratulations Hun - I am sure some lovely members will be able to assist :) xx
first and mainly, congrats mate, children are the best thing ever!
im going back nearly 4 years so these are hazy memories, expect sex levels to drop, she will be tired etc but support her, be there for her and enjoy the time you do get together.
as for the new born, expect to spend a lot of time 'having a shower!' hehe
my son is 3 now and my wife are getting back on track
In the first 3 months we hardly did it, I had threatened miscarriages both times. However, last time I was pregnant and I hit 20 weeks, I was rampant! My hubby threatened to sleep in the car to get some peace :/ lol. Of corse, everyone is different tho, and you'll have to talk to your partner about it and be patient with her x
Everyone as different rearding libido during pregnancy, first trimester morning sickness tends to be a damper, lasst trimester backache and heartburn as well as generall fatigue, for most people the middle trimester is the funnest though your mileage may vary 
Have fun!
Congratulations.
Everyone is different.
My wife was a rampant as hell when pregnant and I loved having sex with her as she got bigger, it was an incredible turn on.
Hi big Ali my wife is preggers for the 4th time and this time like the others I am feeling super neglected as we've gone from having sex 10 times a week to nit at all. It's perfectly normal. Tiredness levels are at the highest in the first trimester. Hormonal and physical changes also happen mostly in the first 3 months. Also risk of miscarriage etc are much higher in first 13 weeks. Be patient and loving for her as she needs you :) When you have little kids sex isn't too difficult as they sleep loads. Your and her tiredness will be the limiting factor. There is a separate thread on here about fitting sex in when you have older kids. Congrats & good luck :)Big ali wrote:
Hi all
Have found out in the last month that my wife is pregnant. Its great!Am i being selfish in feeling neglected in the bedroom now she is pregnant or is this normal?
I know she is very tired. .. and I want to be supportive.
For those of you with children
How do you fit in sex with a new born? And when they get older. ..What about during pregnancy?
Tips and advice welcome. ..
So excited about the future
We have a 4 year old and are currently expecting another at end of jan.
we found as others have said the first trimester was pretty much a no go, but after that anytime anywhere (where possible without being arrested of course!)
in terms of sex when you have kids you should find plenty of time as long as you both have the energy. In 4 years we have only been almost caught once, and that was only playing which was our own fault for getting carried away in the morning before he got up.
Chances are plenty of sex during pregnancy then a drop off, tiredness from a baby on the house. The hormonal changes and physical trauma etc it may pick up again only to drop when your Mrs returns to work.
Pregnancy sex has also differs between each of our pregnancies.
With our first child, sex was mainly during the second trimester.
Second child, my wife wanted sex most during 2nd & 3rd trimester, but near the end she go very large so we had to be creative in the bedroom. Spoon position seemed to work well.
With our third, she was horny all the time - which was fun !!!!
Thanks for your advice.
I agree and have been very supportive. I look forward to secretly having sex in between baby sleeps. ...let's not wake the baby!
Firstly congratulation!
I already have a 2 year old and the OH is pregnant again, for us she loves sex when she is pregnant and generally i find she is extra horny during this special time.
I know it is hard to fit in sex when the baby is first born but im sure you'll both be too tired for it at first, plus when you both feel up for it im sure you'll find a way maybe when the baby is kipping during the day or even if one of the family member has it for you both over night.
Best of luck and hope all goes well
Hi and congratulations on your news.
My wife had 2 very different pregnancies. The first time around she was too tired and sore to have an active sex life but the second time around was completely the opposite.
Expect little for the first couple/few months as this is the time that women are really feeling low and tired. That's the phase of bubble baths and footrubs.
A sex life with smaller children is very easy for reasons already explained. We put our kids to bed in the early evening so they are usually in a coma from 10pm onwards - you can then make as much noise as you want!
Even better, you can put a stair gate across their bedroom door so you know you will be safe!
For me I was a complete hornball in one of my pregnancies, however in the other pregnancy I had such bad morning sickness and tiredness at the start that I would probably have bit his willy off if he dared touch me with it.
After about week 13 she will get her energy back and get the pregnancy glow. At this point most women are wanting to have sexy because they may not look overly pregnant.
By the last month or two I was very sore. Sex was only really possible spooning.a lot if women get painful hips during pregnancy which can make sex uncomfortable. It's important she doesn't have sex in missionary position as they wait of her growing bump and put pressure on her major blood vessels which can reduce bloody flow to the baby. Girl on top and spooning tend to be they easiest positions for most women.
After the baby is born she will bleed. Some women bleed for weeks. They advise you don't have sex for the first 6 weeks after sex , especially if you have had any cuts or tears. So you better get used to sorting yourself out in that time. We managed it after 4 weeks but to be honest, it felt like shit for me but I felt sorry for him which is why I done it.
Lactating is another issue post baby, it might make her feel uncomfortable having breast milking leaking out, so it may be more comfortable for her to wear a bra mid sex.
Newborns tend to sleep a lot. So we never really found the new babies interrupted things, however we were often a little too tired to get jiggy.
You will find a routine and a way to ensure you still have sex. Our oldest is 9 and youngest 8 months ( several kids in between) and they honestly do not effect out sex life. I think it's the teenage years that cause the real problem.
So relax. Remember sex doesn't necessarily need to be intercourse. You can find other ways to satisfy each other. Also make sure you tell her how beautiful she is over the next few months. Pregnancy really changes a women's body and it can really knock a women's confidence. Personally I love my body when I'm pregnant. But I know friends who hated the effect if there growing belly.
Basically what everyone else has already said: it varies and I personally found I was very horny during the last two trimesters. First one was basically just sleep and eat.
One thing to remember after the baby is born and if the mother is breastfeeding is that lactating actually puts the body in a fake menopause, which is why she probably won't have a period for a long time after birth. (Depends a little on how much she breastfeeds and other individual things. Mine didn't return until a year later.) But this also means that the mucous membrane in the vagina can be drier and more sensitive than usual. So invest in a good lubricant!
And well, just go slow in the beginning if she's had a vaginal birth. Let her decide the pace and if penetration should take place at all.
During my pregnancy my sex drive came and went in waves. I'm afraid you're just going to have to go with it and let her dictate a lot of it. However when my sex drive was low I was aware that he shouldn't have to suffer so I made an effort to please him with some oral/hands/let him masturbabte on me. He appreciated it as he knew I wasn't in the mood but he was dying for some relief!
Once baby arrived and we had a while to adjust to being parents I admit that sex did take a back seat at times. However we made fun of it and made a game of having sex before the baby woke from nap or whatever. Also, our parents are only too happy to take her so we can have weekends away so we can rest and enjoy some together time. You are going to have to accept it will change your sex life but make sure it doesn't disappear-sometimes I get so caught up with baby that it's only when we're having sex that I realise how much I miss the closeness and intamacy with my partner.
Good luck with the pregnancy/baby-most magical thing in the world!