Hi 2nd day here.First question did anyone’s sex life take a massive boost after the menopause? I had a massive drop during the peri menopausal stage but have recently found it has gone higher than ever.Hubby enjoying it loads 
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Hi @LadyA1 my wife started menopause very early and has suffered with very low / non existent sex drive. She is unable to take HRT due to breast cancer in the family. It sounds like hubby and you are having a lot of fun.
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Hi there,
My libido hit rock bottom during menopause in my early 40s - we also had a poorly little one with disabilities, so I’m sure the stress of that had an effect.
I just didn’t feel any desire, and then suddenly I did - it came rampaging back mid-40s and I found Lovehoney to the delight of my OH. I was quite rampant!
There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to it - I guess we all just have to go with the flow and hope for understanding partners. I think it is fluctuating hormones which cause problems with mood and libido - once things settle the good feelings come back.
Lockdown and a bereavement (again, stress - not good) have dampened things recently, but I now have a huge stash of toys and lingerie so it wont be long before things get back to normal.
There are some good menopause sites, for women and their partners regardless of whether or not they take hrt: Menopause Matters and The Menopause Doctor (Dr. Louise Newson).
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Funny how that can happen isn’t it especially as menopause is all about losing the hormones! It’s really good though in showing sex don’t have to stop after that phase in life and it can actually be even more of an awakening. Really pleased to hear you’ve rediscovered this 
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Me too!
Took a bit of research though - obviously desire is important, but also using better lubes, putting more emphasis on play and less on penetration all helped.
I also use vagifem, which is an oestrogen suppository which helps to keep vaginal tissue subtle - I believe that can be taken even if other forms of hormone replacement are not advisable (obviously, people should check with their GP).
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My wife’s libido didn’t change during the menopause but her responses to stimuli did.
She lost the ability to orgasm through oral sex or through stroking her clitoris. She needed much stronger stimulation to orgasm. Fortunately vibrators took care of that.
Slowly her earlier responses returned over the years.
At the time I couldn’t stand to be touched at all luckily that has all gone now and I feel much more back to normal
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I honestly though I would never get it back I wasn’t at work so also not so tired my hubby encouraged me to masterbate everyday which I agreed to after a while.It brought alot of sensation back and now we are back on track lol.Sorry to hear your wife has had problems
Thank you for your comments. Its interesting that masterbation helped. She only seems to use toys when I am with her. Se normally shows no interest. We are both getting on in age and have a great life. That little bit extra would just be the icing on the cake. I’m glad it 's working out for you. @LadyA1. Also thank you to @MsR for everything and all others that have commented.
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My wife, similarly, only used toys when I was with her and by and large preferred me to use the toys on her rather than to do it herself. 18 months ago though we moved to a male chastity relationship where she now has full control over my orgasms and also her own. This has led to her taking complete responsibility for her orgasms and the way she achieves them. She now masturbates regularly whether I am there or not (although she does like me to watch) and her orgasm control has become impressive. She can come quickly. or hold back for ages using any of the toys she owns whereas previously she needed specific types of stimulation to be sure of orgasming. We’re 68 and 69.
I’m not suggesting that you adopt the same lifestyle as us but if she masturbates with you present try suggesting that she does it while you are in the shower or while you pop downstairs to make a cup of tea. Build up gradually and see if that works.
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I think this programme was excellent. My wife is mid 40s now - so is starting to worry about the incoming storm - hopefully this will have helped her feel a bit more prepared.
Excellent recommendation @GoGirl12 I encouraged my wife to watch the programme with me. I think what was evident was that do not accept being fobbed off by your doctor and try to get to the experts in the matter.
i also found the book very interesting and useful on my points
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Thankyou I am so glad too I feel so more alive and sexy again in fact he is having to keep up with me lol
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Yes just going with the flow and really enjoying it all again
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You are one lucky lady, I wish my wife became like you and wanted it more. All I can say is well done and enjoy.
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Ahh thankyou you never know never say never I honestly thought it had gone perimenopause it was around 2 years we had sex but I never felt like it.Now it has come back massively and my sex drive is better than ever so there is hope.
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