With having 3 kids under 4, it has to he spontaneous for us. Can almost guarantee that if we try and make plans then something will happen with the kids to prevent it. Kids are so unpredictable with late bedtimes, early mornings, interrupted sleeps. We just try to take advantage of the opportunity when it arises. I’m hanging out for the day they start having sleepovers with grandparents! Lol
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Whenever I plan to do this or that, I get really into the moment and just go with the flow, and it’s normally amazing, there’s still scenarios I want to happen, but the spur of the moment times are just awesome
If you planned a routine would it not become a chore to be done daily or weekly? Sex is supposed to be spontaneous and as desired. Not a scheduled thing IMO.
We plan to have dressing up nights and Tokyo role play that professional it’s done every month not certain date and it’s exciting as u don’t expect it
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3 was never the plan 
Went back for one more and blessed with twins!
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We don’t plan as such - but sometimes if we’ve been busy and life’s got in the way a bit we will plan a night away which we say is for a break but we both know it’s to catch up on sex 
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I bet you love them all. 
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We don’t generally plan.
That said, we have a house guest at the moment. As soon as they leave on Saturday my wife and I are planning to get naked and fuck!
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We generally don’t plan. I do like to plan and be sending sexy messages about the night through the day. But it will sometimes backfire and I end up being too excited during the day and then I’m really sensitive and don’t las long for the deed.
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We don’t plan it at all, but often falls on the same few nights of the week and weekend.
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I don’t thinking planning is the way to go, personally, open communication about how your feeling for night/moment and being understanding if your OH isn’t into it is important.
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Totally agree with this for intimacy or just plain old hot sex. There are times, interestes, and scenes where the planning process can really lead up to something special. Kind of like having Christmas presents but not being able to.open them until later.
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I like a mix of planning & spontenaeity.
It really makes me smile when my wife 'schedules in’ a 'dick appointment‘ via text 
, tho’ I do wish there were fewer last minute cancellations
But seriously, I do love planning sex. And the prep can be a lot of fun, and builds desire.
With the way our lives are at the moment though, being able to ring-fence a regular date & time to have sex is a bit of a distant dream, and even a one-off can be compromised, if not impossible.
Days of the week don‘t always line up with the phases of the moon/shark week for starters. Many people find being a parent or carer can also be a total cock-block, passion killer, etc.
For us, a difficult day at work or other distressing situation can often leave one or both of us feeling run over and more in need of tea & chat & cuddles.
We both do like to prepare for sex, even if it’s just with simple steps like getting washed and smelling nice before we hop into bed, or organising a couple of toys, or restraints, and warming up the lube. Or perhaps getting dressed up and going out for a date, with the intention of sex later to round off a nice evening.
My wife enjoys wearing sexy lingerie or even just getting dressed up and looking amazing. On a busy weeknight, she might also lie naked under the covers and give me a flash as I get into bed.
All these things are plans made in advance, but the sizes and timescales vary a lot. Some plans happen a long time ahead, others perhaps minutes ahead. So while it may have the appearance of spontenaeity, it most often isn‘t 100% spontaneous, just a sexy plan waiting for for the right moment.
Truly spontaneous mind-blowing sex, where the stars align, our minds and bodies are both absolutely ready, and every touch is amazing and we come together, is awesome. But in reality, the bulk of spontaneous sex is not always mind blowing. It‘s hot to feel desire and for that desire to be met.
So I feel that really great spur of the moment, totally spontaneous, sex is a really fun bit of spice to add in the mix. I definitely want the option, but spontenaeity isn’t always essential for pleasure.
Planning can sound unsexy. Imagine minutes monthly planning meetings, with quotas!
But it really doesn‘t have to be unsexy.
Texting ‘I‘ve got plans for you later 
’, usually raises the temperature!
Take BDSM play, for an example: An certain amount of planning is absolutely essential, with consent/boundaries, safewords, desires and pleasures discussed in advance. Sometimes these can change over time and consent discussions, for example can be renegotiated in the moment during a scene. But a boundary shouldn‘t be crossed before the consent is given. So plans are made and updated constantly. Not every kinky interaction has a specific plan or format, but the whole thing is built on prior discussion and therefore planned. I have alternatives on hand to try out if something isn’t working, so it‘s more a case of plans, plural, rather than a fixed plan.
I enjoy dreaming up scenes and preparing the things that will enhance the pleasure for both of us later on. And I often switch on the warming drawer whether I have kinky or more vanilla plans afoot. Though often the toys are warmed up and go unused, or plans get abandoned or adapted once I 'read the room‘ on where we‘re both at.
They say in the military, that few battle plans survive first contact with the enemy. Not that it‘s a battle, and my wife is not an adversary! It‘s just an interesting idea that there are things in life that aren’t totally plannable. But making plans is both massively helpful & reassuring.
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Spontaneous for us! We have tried to plan naughty sexy nights many times but whenever we do more often than not it’s spoilt by something cropping up!
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Most of the time we know what we’ll start off doing but not necessarily how it will finish.
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Love this approach!