Found an online one, filled mine in honestly, hubby filled his in and the results are 😞
Very little on there and not much, if anything, new to try.
So disappointed. The fun and passion is disappearing
I wouldn't say so, its probably that you have tried most things.
We complete a survey on each other ( the version that is found in a couple of oral sex guides) about once a year and find that we can change. For example Anal with me was a maybe at one stage but because of my IBS problem it is now a fat No.. So somethings can change over time and not always for the worse. Both of us want to try electro stimulation but as noted in a thread on this subject the price is a little too high for us at the moment .So it remains a "Maybe" at the moment .
Just try and keep upbeat about it and at least he's willing to complete one whiich is sometimes half the battle .
Oh no, it doesn't mean the fun and passion Has to disappear. Is there not things that you may have done earlier in the relationship that you can revisit.
Strip it back to basics in the bedroom and start from the beginning again?
Or list what you both currently practise and see if we can come up with slighltly different alternatives to try.
Maybe it's not about trying something completely new? Maybe you could find new ways to enjoy the things you already do?
An example could be that you both have said yes to sex games. There are loads of these to choose from and doubt that you have tried them all . Even if you have then there are family games that you can alter. Playing Twister naked after quite a few drinks is really fun.
The passion shouldn't have to die just because there is nothing new to try!
Have you gone back to basics - massage, oils, candles, new positions, rose petals, sex in new places e.g. kitchen table, stairs, bathroom. Is it possible to book a hotel room together and have a sexy bubble bath together? Just because there is nothing new to try doesn't mean your relationship is failing, don't give up! *hugs*
Thanks everyone.
The thing is we've done very little off the list 🙁
although we've be married almost 20 years I was in a bad place sexually when we met. Since then I've either been pregnant or been ill with depression.
sex was actually amazing when I was pregnant or breastfeeding but that's not happening again 😂
I spoke to hubby and it seems some things he liked he hadn't said yes to because of the way they were worded or he thought it was something I wouldn't like.
So I printed it out with and told him everything I would like to try, and it seems the "to try" list is not that short 👍🏻👍🏻
I've also placed another large order from LH with lots of basics in. Change of room isn't possible due to kids but looking at hotels to give us some privacy. Positions limited due to size and joint pain 😞
Thank you all, your brilliant 😘
For your bedroom door get a small bar lock . We got one and its amazing how secure the Mrs feels when its on . Under £3.00 from your local DIY shop .I appreciate you have a small room problem as well but still the secure door is well worth the investment .The thing that made me get one fitted was not the sex intrusion but our son in his younger days used to barge in when my Mrs was only half dressed .So I decided to put a stop to that .
But yes you can't beat getting a hotel room away .
I guess your "to try" list is the equivalent of our "maybe" list. Before you try anything new its often best to talk about it before trying and therfore no shocks or surprises.
Is there a link for this questionaire?
mysteron wrote:
For your bedroom door get a small bar lock . We got one and its amazing how secure the Mrs feels when its on . Under £3.00 from your local DIY shop .I appreciate you have a small room problem as well but still the secure door is well worth the investment .The thing that made me get one fitted was not the sex intrusion but our son in his younger days used to barge in when my Mrs was only half dressed .So I decided to put a stop to that .
But yes you can't beat getting a hotel room away .
I guess your "to try" list is the equivalent of our "maybe" list. Before you try anything new its often best to talk about it before trying and therfore no shocks or surprises.
It would just be nice to be able to have sex in a different room occasionally.
the "try" list isn't something we plan on working through neccassarily but gives us ideas on what we can/can't try
pusseypleaser wrote:
Is there a link for this questionaire?
https://www.weshouldtryit.com/
I'm glad you've managed to find somethings to work on and some new toys to explore with.
I understand the privacy thing, we have eldest accross the Hall and baby is still in our room. Due to this we are trying to get a hotel and babysitter for the night to get some time together.
Could you not arrange for family to have the children round at theirs for tea or something for a day? Ol
Or dependant on what you're into you can always hire somewhere for a few hours (we both like bondage etc so have been looking at dungeon hire, some of them can be hired out during the day also) x
Jessicaleon11 wrote:
I'm glad you've managed to find somethings to work on and some new toys to explore with.
I understand the privacy thing, we have eldest accross the Hall and baby is still in our room. Due to this we are trying to get a hotel and babysitter for the night to get some time together.Could you not arrange for family to have the children round at theirs for tea or something for a day? Ol
Or dependant on what you're into you can always hire somewhere for a few hours (we both like bondage etc so have been looking at dungeon hire, some of them can be hired out during the day also) x
The kids aren't little so don't think they'd appreciate going to family for tea😂 they're 13 and 17. The other 2 are either at work or uni. much easier when they were little and went to bed before us.
Our questionnaire came within the book "Oral Sex She'll Never forget" by Sonia Borg, available from Love Honey . A great book on this subject and a "sister" book similarly titled but aimed at women giving guys oral sex . This also has the qestionarre within it.
I dare say all the questionnaires are all similar with the idea of avoiding potentially awkward requests and breaking the ice a bit into trying something new or just to spice routine sex up a bit .
They are also easy to make your own every kink or idea listed with a No, Yes or Maybe listed against it for the answer. All you need is a PC connected to a printer.
I think they are really good fun especially when comparing the answers!
When we did our first one the "naughty" stick was hastily purchased ! Its amazing what you can find out about each other this way.
Perhaps as an idea Lovehoney could compose their own questionnaire linked into the community pages as I am sure they would get some decent sales from the results .
In that case. Can you not kick them out to the cinema or into town for 'christmas present shopping'... Lock the front door and have a bit of time to yourselves...
Tell them you and OH are having a nice meal that you are cooking so you'd appreciate then making themselves scarce for a couple of hours...
And as for not appreciating going for tea, tell them they'll have to watch you and OH having a romantic meal otherwise... I'm sure they'll swiftly take up the offer! Haha x
Mysteron - that's a great idea! Id love lovehoney to do their own questionnaire
+1 on lovehoney doing there own questionnaire..mysteron wrote:
Our questionnaire came within the book "Oral Sex She'll Never forget" by Sonia Borg, available from Love Honey . A great book on this subject and a "sister" book similarly titled but aimed at women giving guys oral sex . This also has the qestionarre within it.
I dare say all the questionnaires are all similar with the idea of avoiding potentially awkward requests and breaking the ice a bit into trying something new or just to spice routine sex up a bit .
They are also easy to make your own every kink or idea listed with a No, Yes or Maybe listed against it for the answer. All you need is a PC connected to a printer.
I think they are really good fun especially when comparing the answers!
When we did our first one the "naughty" stick was hastily purchased ! Its amazing what you can find out about each other this way.
Perhaps as an idea Lovehoney could compose their own questionnaire linked into the community pages as I am sure they would get some decent sales from the results .
me and the OH did this but printed them off and folded the questions up and took turms to pick one out after each other well after a few glasses of vino things got very intresting ha
Thanks for the link filrtyatfourty