Been going through peri menopause for last 12 months or so. I have always had a much higher sex drive than partner (even now) which in the past has led me to stray in order to get that itch scratched.
Whenever I am with another person I may not always cum through actual sex but will always cum through oral or them masterbating me, usually within minutes e.g. 5 or maximum 10 and multiple times. However I do not want to continue to stray (it is never often, maximum 1 or 2 times a year when the frustration gets too much).
I have a wide range of toys bought by my partner over the years we have been together ranging from dildos, suction toys and rabbits etc but just can’t cross the finish line when trying solo.
Can anyone please recommend a toy that always works for them, at this moment in time cost is not an object!
So let’s see what toys are available, to quell that fire that burns brightly. I’ll try to give you a few ideas
The Lush 3 or 4 would be my first choice as a solo g spot toy, as it can be used by you, your partner or if there is a need for strange and you use their forum to give out a 1 time code anybody in the world who sees it. It has a music mode and app controls, wearable for long time periods for extended play or while doing other things, and doesn’t break the bank although code FORUM20 will get you a good discount.
Wands for pure clit play. @Stacy2 and others can help.
Glass and metal for the uniqueness of them @Tenshadesandme and others can vouch for them.
But also thinking outside the box, what about a poly relationship instead of random people, where it’s just 1 or 2 extra men in your life @KinkyMira can help with understanding that
I know I’m a man so it might seem strange coming from me but there is a lot of options out there for you. Others will be along with far better thoughts.
I’m just the instigator of your help and I have called upon a trifecta of knowledgeable women how will likely find away to get back at me at some point
Unfortunately lovehoney don’t have their cowgirl machine to link but do have its mini version it’s just got various polarised reviews. But @BrokenEye is right it’s a powerful toy.
Honestly the toy that gets me there everytime is the cutest little Lovehoney heart clitoral suction vibrator. The smoothest out of all I’ve tried (even against womaniser and romp) and has 11 different ‘levels’.
Another toy I would recommend is similar to @JGood’s idea, the lovense Nora like the lush connects to an app but offers the usual dual stimulation of a rabbit but goes further by giving the option of controlling a rotating head that stimulates your g-spot even further alongside clit targeted vibrations.
Whilst I’ve never tried a wand (the noise ) if clit stimulation is what you’re looking for then it might be the toy for you. I also noticed whilst searching for what wand’s Lovehoney offered that one of the top reviews for the one below mentioned going through menopause and this providing just the orgasm they were looking for.
I am no expert on sex , however as a full time soloist I have a few thoughts . Everybody is different as to what gets them going . But for me it is not just the physical feelings , more important is using your largest sex organ , your brain . I lean heavily on fantasies , photos and videos . I imagine sexual acts with real or imaginary people . As I am getting pretty old , it can take more erotic thoughts I imagine . Those generally trigger a good orgasm . I have been DIY sex for many years and it gets a little more challenging for me . Hope that helps .
I’m going to rock the boat here, but where ciit suckers go, I think Lovehoney and ROMP do toys that are more bang for your buck (pun fully intended) than brands like Womanizer. The ROMP lemon and Lovehoney Pocket Pal are both ergonomic, greatly satisfying and very affordable, and if you want penetration, I love my Icicle No 5 Sapphire spiral glass dildo.
I have strayed before too, but my husband and I realised that trust was more important for us than monogamy, and we are now happily non-monogamous. It works for some, it doesn’t work for others, but if toys aren’t enough, a conversation shouldn’t hurt. Best of luck to you.
If a full-size wand (rechargeable or mains) can’t get you across the finish line, I don’t know what else will during solo masturbation.
Ps: The Lovehoney 2.0 wand isn’t great compared to the original older wand, so I won’t ever recommend it. The power for a mains wand was a complete let down.
If money is no object than I suggest a Sybian type machine with various attachments or a thrusting sex machine.
The Sybian type machines would be wonderful if you enjoy powerful vibrations and can be straddled stimulating your clit, vulva, and even your anus. There are attachments with dildos that can be used for penetration and internal stimulation if you enjoy that.
Thrusting machines are also great. Buy a good one and ensure you get an extension rod for longer reach as well as a suction cup attachment so any dildo could be used. If going this route, buy a good one and slip the cheaper models as they are junk. Also look for one with app control as it can then be controlled remotely and even allow play with others from around the globe.
A good thrusting machine can be great as it allows multiple positions and can fuck you relentlessly for as long as you want. They are great for both vaginal and anal and with the right attachment can even be used for double penetration if you are into that. Pair this with some clit stimulation and blast off to the moon in pleasure.
Thank you to all for the advice and recommendations so far. This forum really is extremely helpful. I have had a look at all the links shared and trying to narrow the list down to possibles to buy and try next. I’ve got a few womaniser ones that unfortunately just don’t float my boat or rock my world. I am really interested in the machine but not sure if I can justify the outlay (just yet anyway)
@Tenshadesandme thank you for taking the time to reply and recommend.
My partner is aware and consents to it all but I just feel so guilty and sh!t afterwards. We only have sex together maybe once or twice a year ourselves for various reasons which could be a different thread again.
He fully supports me in that way and is amazing about it all. Normal day to day I would never do it, but on the odd occasion when the frustration peaks and I am out and lubricated through a few drinks it is completely different, which is why it only happens maybe once or twice a year.
He ensures that whenever the time comes I never leave without protection and we always have our phones so know where we are at all times. Hopefully if I can find the elusive orgasm toy it will mean no more extra activity but he is fully on board with me doing what I do or have a regular fwb who can scratch the itch.
@Cumalot82 thanks for the recommendation. I think this is most likely way I am going if I can justify the expense and have a safe hiding place!
The current toy range at home is ridiculous and seriously needs streamlining (especially as many don’t give the o factor).
I’ve got 2 or 3 different Suction toys that get me close but not over the finishing line. Same with rabbits or dildos.
I’m determined to find something that works for me and will persevere until I do
) if clit stimulation is what you’re looking for then it might be the toy for you. I also noticed whilst searching for what wand’s Lovehoney offered that one of the top reviews for the one below mentioned going through menopause and this providing just the orgasm they were looking for.
