Curlycouplewife,
Do you wear knickers or not ?
For U/us, it really depends on what the situation is. If my Sir is just trying to get across a simple correction, then spanking is swift and as is. But if He really wants to punish me, then He won't let anything get in between His hand and my ass. lol
His hand always does more "damage", so to speak, but W/we also use a leather spanker and W/we're looking at getting a leather or suede flogger to keep things interesting.
Curlycouplewife,
I was never smacked as a child , hence I am scared of the pain , I think a riding crop and cane would be too much pain for me ! - we'll start off with something softer - Do you keep you're knickers on or off - my OH wants them off after the hnad spanking.....
Abigail911 wrote:
Curlycouplewife,
Do you wear knickers or not ?
Oops! sorry! No I don't & never have done - to be honest I think it'll make minimal difference. If anything it might be worse because your partner will get a false sense of how hard you can take the pain (if that makes any sense) so if/when you do remove your pants it'll be worse than you're expecting.
I've always taken any spanking etc, naked
CCW x
Abigail911 wrote:
Curlycouplewife,
I was never smacked as a child , hence I am scared of the pain , I think a riding crop and cane would be too much pain for me ! - we'll start off with something softer - Do you keep you're knickers on or off - my OH wants them off after the hnad spanking.....
I certainly wouldn't recommend starting with a crop or a cane - I just thought a list like that might give a bit of an idea where to start.
We started out with this http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=15707 it's in my profile picture. It's very gentle but visually impressive - might be a good place for you guys to start.
CCW x
Curlycouplewife - I was thinking the knicker material would give me a layer of protection from the stings from the paddle and flogger - it is normal to be scared of the pain - I've never received a red hot bottom before !! - I am excited about it but also scared
It's absolutely normal to be afraid - and for me that is part of the fun. The anticipation, guessing how much it will hurt, challenging myself not to safe-word out of it, these are all part of the mental cocktail that makes masochism so appealing to me.
I trust my husband with my life & I know he'd stop instantly if I wanted him to, but once I'm there I don't want it to end.
Nice side effect is it sends lots of blood to the sore places which all happen to be very close to your genitals - it's incredibly arousing for me.
I trust my OH too , he is a very sensual loving person , I guess I am just being silly , I too want to experience the pain , and I want to get that arousing feeling too - does the marks appear on you're bottom for a few days afterwards ?
Abigail from my experience re marks I found a cane left marks longer. The hand didnt really do much for me really.
in my experience it really does take alot for marks to be left, sometimes I ache the next day but as for marks I have only ever have some very faint marks.
KinkyKev,
The cane would be too much pain for me , I cannot ever imagine my OH caning my bottom - I don't want rows of red stripes
Abigail that is why it is essential you communicate with your other half re your boundaries and what he is expecting from you. I thoroughly enjoyed the cane when it happened to me. I completely agree with ccw re safe word, something stupid like banana lol!! That way no can't be construed as yes.
I would go for knickers off every time :)
Just thinking too, if you have knickers off, at least your OH can see how red your backside is getting and will know not to go too far whereas if it's covered he won't be able to tell....
You def need a random safeword before starting out tho.... something that is in no way connected to what you're doing, I use pineapple, haha....
I guess you have to try it to see if you like it, if you don't, you don't but if you do then you can get more adventurous with your 'implements'
I have several spankers and really like this one, http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=15750 and to me it doesn't hurt much at all, cos it's quite flexible, whereas the firmer the implement the more it will hurt....
MTC makes a very good point about your oh been able to see what he has done or is doing and a safe word is essential we use Orange (getting close to my limits now slow down a bit dont go any harder) and Red (STOP)
I certainly wouldn't recommend a caine for someone who has never tried it before it is something that is definatley seen as a more advanced impliment, start with a small flogger or paddle xx
there is a thread some where all about peoples safe words
Fizzy,
Do you do 'spankings' - Do you wear knickers or not ?
MTC,
I thought the material of my knickers would protect my skin
I don't see that they would offer that much protection really.... I would much rather he be able to see the level of 'redness' being created... but that could just be me...
Same as if you bash your leg on something when wearing trousers it will still bruise, the fabric offers no protection...
Abigail911 wrote:
Fizzy,
Do you do 'spankings' - Do you wear knickers or not ?
ive never really tried it. i'm still quite a vanilla person. i just rembered reading the tread and thinking they where some good words if i ever needed them
I think its up to you and you need to establish as to how far you are willing to go, you can start with more gentle spanking over knickers and if you feel comfortable with it, take knickers off and start more gently on bare bottom, but establish a safe word so you can stop him any moment.
I did fear the first time too, but it turned out very well, trust is important and his understanding of your limits, regardless he would like to take it further. It can happen, over time, but it may not and you should set the limits as to what you are comfortable with when it comes to spanking and possibly other punishments in the future