Would like to get some perspectives on this. OH & I are a very happily married straight couple with kids. We have an active and fulfilling sex life. Thing thats prompted the topic is my OH is very much into lesbian porn. She never admits it though, even to me as her husband! Is this odd? She will choose a lesbian video every time we watch porn together and it gets her off every time. However she will never say out loud that is what she wants, she just searches for it and plays it both when we're together and when she's masterbating alone. I have stumbled on her accidentally and this is what she watches when she thinks shes not being watched. So I would like to just get to the point where we can say it to eachother, surely as grown adults in a marriage we can be honest? Maybe it would help if some others can confirm this not unusual. I wonder if she feels like admitting it might undermine our relationship in someway because it means she isnt totally straight. I dont know.
I think maybe if you've been with someone a long time you need to find a way of getting variety but obviously without cheating, so perhaps by watching women it allows her to have a different experience and feel like she gets something 'new' without undermining your relationship, because if she's straight (or mostly straight) she isn't going to actually develop feelings for another woman so it doesn't feel like a 'betrayal' of you.
Also, I dont believe people are strictly straight, gay or bi. I believe the idea of the kinsey scale so if 1 = completely gay 10 = completely straight and 5 = equal attraction to both sexes, maybe your wife is an 8, so she doesn't actually identify as bi or want relationships with woman, but can still have some sort of attraction to the women on screen.
Sorry if I'm not explaining this well. I don't imagine this would be particularly unusual. Maybe if you outright tell your wife that you won't judge her for being 8/10 on the scale instead of 10/10 she'll be more honest with you.
I'm a straight woman but i prefer porn thats either two women, or one woman solo or a threesome.
For me its more of a fantasy thing i think. I dont really get much out of seeing straight couples have sex, because i could do that myself. Seeing women together is something completely different and something i can only imagine. I also find women to be more sensual than men in porn.
Ive never watched a porn video and been attracted to anyone in it, so its not a case of preferring one gender over the other, i guess its just something different.
I didnt tell my husband for a start. I guess i was worried that he might think maybe i was more into women and that i wasnt satisfied with straight sex (i am completely satisfied!) or that he would think too much of it and get too into the idea of other women being involved!
I think alot of people watch types of porn that don't necessarily match up with the sex they want in real life.
+1
I get turned on by gay (male) porn and I'm a straight married woman. Lesbian porn on the other hand does absolutely nothing to me, it rather bores me instead of a turn-on.
I agree, Hen Night Toad, in any committed relationship both parties should be able to honestly and openly talk about any topic without fear of prejudice. Maybe you could recommend your wife to snoop around on the various topics here (even without signing up she can access and read it all) on the Lovehoney Forum so she'll see that there are lots of people with lots of different kinks and very accepting with each other too. I was always open minded, but these forums and the friendly attitude that generally people have on here helped me broaden my horizons and accept so many more kinks even if not personally interested in them! Or, as a first step, you could start opening up to her with casual talks about things that you read on here to see if she is curious or open to the idea of snooping around herself.
Hen night toad my OH is the same. We've been together for many a year and I still find my wife gets embarrassed and doesn't feel she can be totally open and honest with me about what she likes.
I've never been anything but open minded and I'm totally happy with my sexuality etc and what I like. Weird.
Hey ho, takes all sorts I guess.
My wife will watch lesbian porn with me but don't think she'd tell me if she likes it or not. Its almost like a CIA interrogation trying to get her to open up.😆