May seem a stupid question, but as it's primarily a masturbation lube, has it got a taste and can you then use it as a normal lube for sex?
I'm thinking of getting a sachet of it as a little treat for hubby when he has to provide a "sample" to ensure his snip has worked, but I can't resist using my mouth as well as my hands, plus he prefers it that way.
Just want to make sure it doesn't taste nasty and doesn't matter if it gets in my bits too.
I have personally never used it but did have a look at the reviews on it, all though no one has seemed to have mentioned taste on a review but one did comment that it smelled a bit like rancid oil..
I was wondering if you thought of using another type of flavoured lube as there are lots of diffrent flavours to choose from that gives a nice taste but also the lubrication? Just a thought...
xx
I've ordered a multi pack of flavored lubes too - I just thought as the S 29 stuff is just for him, it would be a nice way of getting him to "produce". I didn't see the smell comment, oh well, if it smells bad I won't go near it as I have an ultra sensitive palate for taste and smells, it is only 99p so never mind. I've ordered the tracey cox lube as well.
How can something be good if it smells nasty? Or do blokes just not care?
My vielle gel stuff has an odd aroma of oiliness, but it's not unpleasant thank goodness, more almondy than anything.
I've got some here, give me a moment to taste and smell it, and I'll get back to you.
Ok, my personal opinion after one cursory smell and taste test, is that it both smells and tastes of cooking oil, like vegetable oil.
I suspect that like cooking oil, the taste will be cumulative and will become more and more unpleasant the more you taste it, but that's just me speculating.
I hope that helped. :)
Thank you ! Are we talking olive oil or sunflower oil? Perhaps it would be ok with a lemon sherbet in my mouth!
I guess I won't be doing much tasting with it then, so any tips for a great hand job?
He loves me switching from hand to mouth so I only ever do it as part of oral and not as the "main attraction" so I've not given a "proper" hand job in over 20 years.
Definitely not like olive nor sunflower oils. Much like the cheaper vegetable cooking oil, as I said. And I think that the taste of lemon sherberts probably will clash with the taste of vegetable oil. Mayonnaise might be good though. :p
I'm afraid I don't have many tips to give you for hand jobs, as most usually I have my male partners masturbate for me, because they know their own bodies best. Perhaps you could let him do the penis part himself, and devote yourself to other parts of his body, such as massaging his perineum, holding, squeezing, scratching his testicles, tweaking his nipples, nuzzling, all the while talking to him and saying deliciously filthy things about stuff which turns him on. Stuff like that maybe?
Enjoy. :)
I've tried the perineum massage thing twice but he says he feels nothing from it?
I could definitely go for him masturbating himself , whist I offer some encouragement - maybe my basque and stockings + high heels will set a nice mood too.
Ball licking / nuzzling and nibbling his hips is a favourite , I can't talk dirty to save my life unfortunately and he would laugh if I seriously tried, it's just not us - he does get off on hearing me say how I want him to spank me though .
I just want to make it a more pleasant experience than him just "wanking into a pot" - he's a bit overly sensitive about his impending snip at the moment. I've even wondered about getting him to come in my mouth and spitting it back out into the pot but I didn't like to ask the doctor if it would be OK!
Ok, perineal massage is easy, but it does take a specific technique to get it to feel good. This is how I do it.
I hope that helps. :)
That's incredibly helpful, thank you. I really want to try it again now I know where I was going wrong.
He was fully aroused both times but I obviously wasn't applying nearly enough pressure, I was using 2 fingers and trying to feel for "something" , I suppose it's obvious when you press hard enough? Lube or no lube?
Is masturbation / fellatio required at the same time for orgasm? My coordination is not fantastic.
If he loves it then I may just be able to persuade him to let me go for his prostate internally. I think it may be more of a cleanliness issue with him because I know I always get extra clean with a wet wipe right inside my anus if sex is on the cards, he doesn't always have a play there but he knows I love it when he does.
I didn't like the idea of sticking my finger up my bum to clean it at first but it doesn't bother me now and he never asked me before putting a finger( or tongue) in there the first time, at least I'm asking him!
Lady Lara wrote:
That's incredibly helpful, thank you. I really want to try it again now I know where I was going wrong.
He was fully aroused both times but I obviously wasn't applying nearly enough pressure, I was using 2 fingers and trying to feel for "something" , I suppose it's obvious when you press hard enough? Lube or no lube?
What you'll feel is the root of the penis moving under your fingers. You have no way of knowing how hard is just right unless he tells you. :) In my experience, the really hard amount of pressure is commonly good for most men, but exactly how hard they prefer varies between individuals. And also in my experience, the spot just behind the scrotum is the most effective place to start.
I never use lubricant explicitly for perineal massage, but sometimes fingers get slippery, you know? ;) In my experience, I have never needed lubricant for this.
Lady Lara wrote:
Is masturbation / fellatio required at the same time for orgasm? My coordination is not fantastic.
Oh, definitely, this is not a one stop shop technique for orgasms, other stuff is definitely required. :) He can masturbate whilst you introduce him to perineal bliss and blow his socks off. :p
Lady Lara wrote:
If he loves it then I may just be able to persuade him to let me go for his prostate internally. I think it may be more of a cleanliness issue with him because I know I always get extra clean with a wet wipe right inside my anus if sex is on the cards, he doesn't always have a play there but he knows I love it when he does.
I didn't like the idea of sticking my finger up my bum to clean it at first but it doesn't bother me now and he never asked me before putting a finger( or tongue) in there the first time, at least I'm asking him!
If he's really concerned about hygiene, how about getting a box of nitrile gloves, one for each of you in the appropriate size? They come in funky colours, and you can just turn them inside out as you take them off and throw them away.
Besides which, he might feel reassured if you remind him that most of his poos are bigger than any of your fingers. :)
If you want to hear a real horror story (it's pretty short) about my anus which is absolutely sure to make your husband's fears seem easier for him to face, I'll tell you in the next post. :)
Good advice there Lubyanka thanks!
My pleasure, Imeldaimelda. :)
Now I'm back from work, I'd love to hear about it, thank you.
Oh and one last question, is there any best position for his optimum pleasure, lying down, kneeling over me etc.?
I want to make it good , no, fabulous - I don't think he believes me when I tell him it's supposed to feel amazing and on a different level, but then he didn't think g-spots and squirting were real until we found both!
I should have known - I always have to do things far harder to him than I think I will need to, especially massage. If I get him fresh out of the bath, he may be more open to my fingers exploring a bit too.
Ok, kvetch says the best position to assume is the Relaxed Horny position, which I think just means whichever way both of you are comfortable. :)
Also, instead of going for "fabulous", I'd recommend going for "average", because "average" is infinitely more achievable, more realistic, and easier to aim for. Remember that the closeness you two share is already fabulous, so anything else is a bonus. :)
Now, for the story ...
A few years back, I had just had some really serious surgery (which I am still recovering from). I was in a lot of pain which made it very difficult for me to move, and for that I was on very strong opiate-based painkillers. One side effect of the painkillers was constipation, for which I was on other, different tablets. One side effect of the surgery was that I was strongly advised to avoid straining during bowel movements, otherwise I might rupture something.
So imagine this, I had a seriously bunged up poo factory and couldn't strain it out. What a dilemma!
The solution I was kind of forced into was, on the days that things just weren't going to move without intervention, I ended up soaping up my index finger and hooking out everything I could scoop up.
After a few times of doing that, I lost any apprehension whatsoever of poo and anus and rectum. It took no time at all to regard that activity as totally mundane and normal.
So if you tell that to your husband, and remind him that poo is only poo and it has been made you and him and everybody else, and it's a body secretion like saliva and ejaculate and urine and tears and sweat. Tell him how it can take a few times to get used to it, and once that happens, think of all the yumminess which can ensue. And how long did it take him to get used to and good at sexual activity? So, think of that.
There. Oh, almost forgot...
And they all lived happily ever after. With my poo. The end. :)
Funny you say all that - I've got no issues now with getting a couple of fingers up my bum with a bit of soapy water or a wet wipe, if we ever get around to full anal for me , I certainly know how to relax and open the door, so to speak.
I wish I knew why it's taken us 20 years to get around to all this yummy stuff, I suppose neither of us ever realised just what we were missing. Better late than never eh??
It may give the lab techs a laugh, but I don't know why it would spoil the sample, all they check for is the presence of sperm in the sample, whether alive or dead. I doubt that saliva dissolves sperm on contact!
It's not like a fertility test, they aren't checking glucose levels / sperm motility etc.
I would hope that there will be no little swimmers by that stage anyway, you have to wait 12 weeks to be tested. It takes on average 20 ejaculations to be sperm free after vasectomy, I'm sure we could manage that in half the time, especially as we will be on holiday for a couple of weeks in the interim.
Lady Lara, I was just wondering how you got on with the perineal massage? I'd love to know if it worked out for you and your husband. Did the new techniques do the trick?
Hello Lubyanbka,
I did try it and again got very little in the way of a pleasurable response, " nothing special " were the words he used - I got the whole fingers rolling the root bit going well, but - nothing! He just doesn't like it very much, so that's that. Do you think there's a medical condition called an insensitive perineum?
Haven't even used the stroke 29 lube yet, he had to postpone his snip because of work so it's now in a couple of weeks.
No nuts driving here at all.
SG69 x