I am a male, 26 in a relationship with my female partner, 23. We’re friends with a straight couple (the male of which I’ve been good friends with since childhood). We have all mentioned swinging (but haven’t discussed as a group) as we thought it would be fun and we’re all attracted to each other, but my partner is the only one out of the 4 of us that isn’t keen, despite finding the other couple attractive.
I’m not sure if my partner will ever change her mind, but it’s something I really want to do. On a separate note, my partner hasn’t ruled out a threesome with female we don’t know. I was wondering if any of you have had a similar experience and have any tips or advice?
Thanks in advance! 
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Hmm no experience here but I’d say take your partners opinions into valid account and maybe try exploring what she’s comfortable with and in time she might be more up for your desires 
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There are already a lot of threads on swinging and theeesomes if you search for it
Me and my partner have also discussed swinging, threesomes etc and from what I have been told and seen on here, it is best to not do this with friends as it can cause issues and you may ruin your friendship.
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I will take a look! I just wondered if anyone has had a very similar experience.
I have heard it’s best not to with friends, generally speaking. Perhaps she will be more up for it in time with a couple we don’t know!
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Would never do that myself, if it goes wrong, which some threesomes have done, you will have lost a friend.
Some comments were made regarding this here Asking friends to have a swingers party? - #3 by UKlovingcouple
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No experience personally but it seems the advice is don’t do it with friends and everyone has got to be 100% in favour of it. A swingers club is your best option may be take your friends along as well. Its something that really has to be discussed with everyone in great detail.
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I would echo the ‘avoid friends’ advice, especially if your OH isn’t necessarily feeling it in the first place. We hooked up with one of my wife’s uni friends a couple of years back and whilst it started off quite liberating it ended up being really awkward and we haven’t spoken much with her since (not just because of covid!).
Best advice is find out why she’s hesitant and talk it though - the last thing you want is for her end up doing it because she feels pressured/nagged in to it.
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I think this is the most important piece of advice, it’s something that is going to take a LOT of trust and if she isn’t 150% on board with it it’s probably going to be a really bad experience for her in many ways 
Once you’ve seen something, you can’t un-see it
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I’d love to add a third person into the mix at least once. Spoke to my husband about it last night and literally said I don’t mind if another female or male. He just said no - it could ruin a marriage and he’s not willing to risk it. Ho hum
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Going against the general consensus of not inviting friends here…
My ex boyfriend and I (no, he’s not an ex for this reason… 
) regularly invited his best friend to join us. For us it worked, we had a lot of fun, then out of the bedroom we continued a great relationship and friendships. No dramas at all, and they still remain best friends.
However, this is only me telling you that there can be little successes from it, not always. I would recommend not pursuing anything that your OH isnt 100% happy with though. Communicate communicate communicate.
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Got to talk it through with your oh, let her lead otherwise there will be wedge develop in the relationship…
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Unfortunately you just need to accept it but if you have not done already introduce a dildo/vibrator as the second person. I would think you have done this already but its just a suggestion.
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I’m glad you had a good experience of this. You seem very open minded. I love your photos that you post. You appear to be very body confident.
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Yeh thanks - we’ve already added hundreds of pounds worth of toys. I will just keep my fantasy as a fantasy!
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Both me and my wife are newly into swinging, but wouldn’t think of doing it with friends, it might change the dynamic of the group beyond repair. I would tread forward with caution . But good luck in what ever you decide
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I’d say a big no to inviting friends in. This can be a sure fire way to not only ruin a good friendship but also destroy a marriage.
I know of two couples who’ve done this , one with a male friend and one with another couple. The first couple already had a marriage on dodgy ground and thought somehow that adding another person into their sex life would spice things up. Apparently the husband was ok during and afterwards but then paranoia crept in bigtime. He accused his wife of being more attracted to his friend more than him, even though the whole thing was his idea. It didn’t end well for any of them, a friendship ruined and the end of the marriage.
The ones who got together with another couple faired a bit better as they met via a site and didn’t know each other previously. There was still a bit of jealously but they got over it mainly I think because their marriage was so strong.
I’d say don’t do it with friends, only go into it if your relationship is very secure and ALL parties have to be 100% on board with it. Sure, it can work for some people but it’s a risk as no one knows what their feelings will be like afterwards.
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My gut feeling is that, if your partner isn’t keen, then it isn’t happening; at least not without serious relationship repercussions.
Personally, if she’s open to a MFF threesome and you’re keen, I’d be exploring that option to see how it flies before pushing for a swinging couple scenario. Who knows, it may whet her appetite for it, and you don’t risk alienating her completely.
I probably agree with most here that swinging with friends is not a good idea as it is maybe ‘too close’ and likely lead to all the issues others have raised.
That said me and one of my closest girlfriends (I’ve known her since school) do ‘get together’ now and again, usually after a night out or if we visit each other for a weekend. Our husbands both know we have done this before and don’t seem to mind this.
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As you folks know if you read my blog, all of this kind of activity has been with friends, and it has worked out well for us. Just make sure all the friends are totally on board with it, as genuine fwbs rather than some other motive. We’ve been lucky. I know others haven’t.
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Me and my husband are desperate for a threesome with another girl, we are very open and trust each other completely.
What’s your opinion on them? Should they be with a stranger or someone we know?
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