the bit about anal that makes me sad

When the toy comes out, even with something smooth like glass, sometimes it seems to grip inside me. With shorter things plenty of lube overcomes this problem, as things go deeped they keep gripping, so fat I only got past this with really slow progression and ridiculous amounts of lube re-application. I worry about leaving my buttplug in for even 1/4 hour for this reason.

Anyone else have this problem or have I just got a dry arse?

Have you tried a enima? This really helps make you lube work a hundred times better. Plus it will help with larger toys if you feel like you want to up the deapth a little. :)

I guess I will need to give it a go. Enema jsut sounds like such an extreme form of anal play, and I am really only an occaisional dabbler. I guess if I just treat it as a health exercise and crack on with my crack as a seperate operation.

You don't need a full enema, maybe try just a douche? That only takes a few minutes and isn't as harsh on your insides :)

I know this does sound a tad explicit.. But I have only tried my douche a couple of times.. Do you have to get into a particular position/ shower or over loo to use it?.
1 st time I got water everywhere except where I was aiming!😄 think it was not connected that time correctly..

naughty mum wrote:

I know this does sound a tad explicit.. But I have only tried my douche a couple of times.. Do you have to get into a particular position/ shower or over loo to use it?.
1 st time I got water everywhere except where I was aiming!😄 think it was not connected that time correctly..

I've been the same, or its just gone all down my legs, unless I put one foot on a stool and clench like mad, haha! ![](upload://kym5tZ5EfyJxs6TKHB1Q2HtGSpK.gif)

I agree with loulou1997. The rectum is'nt very good at self lubricating.

A douche with warm water will leave you feeling clean and relaxed, and will help with the lube. If I am having more than a finger length, then I insert a syringe and squirt a few cc of lube deep inside. This will help with prolonged sessions and stop the gripping feeling.

Hope this helps.

Enjoy x

naughty mum - Purring Pussy I don't think you are doing it right.

Practice makes perfect. Try again it should'nt be messy.

Enjoy x

I wouldn't think that douching would help, it's not a matter of cleanliness, its the clenching thats obviously the problem.

It sounds like to me you're too stressed out or worked up about butt plugs. Maybe your first experience you were nervous and this clenching started and now it's been a constant battle since then?

Are you having any other sexual contact before you put the butt plug in, or are you doing it before sex/masturbation? I find for me I need to be really really really relaxed for it to be comfortable. I've sometimes had that gripping feeling when I haven't been totally relaxed. I find that I'm most relaxed when I'm really aroused. When we have anal sex it's usually after a couple of orgasams, and then just at the brink of another orgasam that's when I get him to enter me. I think it must just relax you more but this always works for me without fail.

You also say that you dabble, do you mind me asking how often? I'm thinking maybe if it's months apart and you're using a plug that isn't aimed for "beginners" then it might be slightly too big? What sort of plugs are you using at the moment?

I also agree with maybe using a syringe with anal lubricant, I've been thinking about this for anal sex. Usually plugs are fine with me but anything longer sometimes makes me feel like I need more lubrication.

I hope some of this might have helped, I didn't want to read and run. Hope you find a solution soon :)

Why not do some anal foreplay to relax your insides!

For example put some lube on your index finger so you can then gently give the anus a little massage or even rub it with you but plug first with lube before you jump in. That should help you get even more relaxed about the hole idea. Even slip a finger inside and wiggle it about so you get used to the feeling when you feal horny enough to do so! First thing i had inside me was one index finger then quickly followed by another! Magical ![](upload://h7LJ67OOrR57VDYrj5ZEwwHAfLG.gif)

Most importantly have a nice relaxing bath or shower before hand and make sure you are super relaxed so you wull soon feel sexy not long after ![](upload://rA41UoqYzU9yrgGiJUyzuRc98GV.gif)

I usually get myself quite worked up before I decide I need a different kind of fun (anal is almost always solo fun at the mo.)

I go for a month or two without, and then have a few weeks involving plenty. Most of the toys I use anally are not so large, this is my #1 and it gives no discomfort.

I do have an unreasonably large smooth glass buttplug which I build up to over a couple of sessions, that one usually feels very grippy.

The difference between these I attributed to the shape, the grippiness I am talking about is entirely internal, not wth the sphincter. There is a definite size difference between the two though...

Not yet built myself up for a douche yet. Haha, its on the books anyway.

I suggest you buy and read The ultimate Guide to Anal Sex. Very helpful, informative and will definitely help with your problems. Anal sex should be a wonderful experience not a let down. The book is available on Lovehoney so you do not need the hassle of going elsewhere.

perhaps change the lube you are using to something more thicker, and try lubing inside you aswell.

Yup..I've had the same problem and discovered it was due to stressing out and not feeling comfortable..when i relaxed everything was fine and I had a lovely time.

I agree with the others about being properly lubed. It can be so tempting to coat something in lube, give your hole a quick once over and then dive in. You can usually triumph over the initial insertion but your muscles haven't been prepped and there probably wont be enough lube inside.

Alternately, I sometimes apply lube inside using a syringe and my body can often rebel and try and get rid of it. So even a token bit of preperation with lube and finger can be useful for smaller stage intertions. It may not even take that long, just enough to let your butt know you're there and things will be happening.

On the douch/internal lube side of things. I own a douche and I hardly ever use it because it's awkward as hell. The bulb is usually too big to fit under you if you're on the toilet, the bulbs require you to squeeze and then hold so that it doesn't suck everything back in and I find that water is always left inside the bulb after which could go anywhere. I prefer to use a syringe like I would for lube. I find I have much better control and there are plenty of reasonably sized options.