I can see when there are long breaks between several rounds of sex, her pussy becomes tight, and it would be difficult to enter her though we use lubricants to ease the pain. Of course, I take much pleasure entering a tight pussy, and she says it’s ok, but I’m still looking for a solution. Any other people experiencing this?
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I’m not a lady as you requested, but generally speaking, unless you’re huge then it’s usually because she’s not turned on enough.
Thx so very much, but I said we use lubricants btw
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Does she warm up with toys before hand?
Like @Gareth said, it could be that she needs more foreplay because she isn’t turned on enough which is why she is feeling discomfort. Lube isn’t an alternative to foreplay. There are lots of changes that happen during arousal including the increase in size of the vagina to allow the penis to enter, it’s not just about lubrication.
There are other reasons why she might be feeling tight or uncomfortable with penetration including menopause, vaginismus or vulvodynia to name a few. Dilators may help with these and allow her to get used to penetration with something small before building up to the size of your penis.
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So is there more fore play that can occur? Or is it basically she is all worn out. I assume when you are talking about this - it is several sessions of intercourse over the course of a single session - not long time (days +) between sex.
I may think you may just need to really get her going - not just using lube but really getting her arroused and ready to receive. Good luck!!!
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What kind of long breaks are you talking about? Have you always needed to use lube for sex?
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A 4-day long or one-week break, I mean. And, yep, We alsways use it.
Ok, so like others have commented, focus on foreplay. What does your foreplay normally look like? From initiation to penetration, how much time would pass and do both you and your partner initiate? And is your wife going through menopause, is that why you use the lube?
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A lot of people in this topic have mentioned that it might be due to not enough foreplay/her not being turned on enough, that could definitely be it!
If its not that I was wondering, does she have any kind of fear, trauma or negative emotions towards sex? Reason I ask is because I have something similar to this called Vaginismus, it’s a mental thing where someone tenses up a lot during sex due to some sort of psychological factor and the vagina because extremely tight
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Thx so very much. No, vaginismus is less likey, as this happens when I’m not having sex with her for 4 days or more. I remember when I was having sex with her once a day at least, I could easily penetrate without her complaining of pain and we both had a great time
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Does she have any dildos or vibrators that are slightly smaller and narrower than you? If so, you could use these during foreplay to ‘get ready’ for you?
Thx so much, I give it a whirl to see if it works.
4 x days is not a long time in my book, and I know that I’m not alone there!
That’s relatively fast for many people in long term relationships.
I think you and her need to have a good conversation about what she needs to be really turned on.
If she is really turned on, it’s very unusual to have a problem - you might need medical advice
As others have said, barring any medical condition, it seems as though she simply isn’t turned on enough.
Sex is as much a mental activity as a physical one. If she isn’t mentally in the right head space for sex then she will not become aroused and that means physically she will not become wet and her vagina will not relax to allow you to enter her.
The fact that you are using lube, rather than her natural lubrication suggests that she needs more time and foreplay. We never need to use additional lube for piv sex, her own lubrication is enough to allow me to easily slip inside her.
I think slow it down, plenty of foreplay and let her dictate the pace.
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What’s her age
As my wife got towards menopause she was way tighter and also dry
Even lube wasn’t enough to make it comfortable for her
After HRT it’s a very different story as she’s more relaxed and definitely has lots of wetness but sometimes we still need a little lube
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Menopause is often the issue . Generally they do not recommend HRT treatment , especially for long term treatment due to the dangers . I bought my wife a set of dilators , she just has never really used them enough to help . And all the lube will not help for her .
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Thx for the tip, and yep, this could possibly be the issue.
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If she enjoys it - just eat the shit out of her. Go between eating and light penetration until everything is a go
Similiar here to a degree, but generally any discomfort is easily avoided by more foreplay and oral before entering.