Hi, a question for all folks out there. My OH had the most amazingly sexy vagina that I absolutely adore playing with and going down on her. However, the problem is simply that she hates recieving oral as she says her vagina is too senitive to have any oral attention. I have tried to being more gentle, softer, firmer, less directed at her vagina and just about everything else but just cant seem to get it right for her. I love my OH dearly and this is becoming a big issue since the more I cant have her pussy in my face, the more I want it and find being turned down leaves me feeling regected which I know is silly since she clearly feels uncomfortable to recieve oral. She also does not allow me to go near her sexy butt hole so I suspect the problem may be more complex than just the sensitivity of her vagina which seem fine during normal sex and vibrator play.
I was wondering if there was any desensitising lube/ gel that we could try to make her less sensitive to a good licking so would appreciate your suggestions if you know of a sure fix solution.
Could it be because she feels self concious and cant relax? I know a lot of woman worry about how their labia look and dont feel comfortable recieving oral -and you just telling her you love it wont be enough to relieve her angst .
I used to be like this and now I can't get enough! I had no underlying issues, I just couldn't tolerate it, I was too sensitive. Perhaps you could work together and try a little at a time and sort of "train" her, I know it sounds odd but thats what happened with me and my partner. I was the same with vibrator play to begin with but the more I tried it the better I got..
my OH has quite a sensitive pussy and isn't keen on vibrations as they're just too much for her...
I always start licking her with big broad strokes with my tounge flat if that makes sense before getting too direct.
But as Slinx said there may be something else that stopping her relaxing and enjoying the experience... Perhaps a nice massage may help her relax before you start. I really enjoy giving oral to MrsB and always tell her so during the experience, perhaps this is worth a try...?
Hi. We have spoken about this as I would like to understand what the main issue is and she has never mentioned any anguish over the looks of her sexy bits and I have being making a concertive effort for the past few years to tell her how much I love her and how she has the most gorgeous vagina - i'm not kidding, she really does have a superb looking and fantastic tasting fanny. Even with the lights off, she doesnt like me going down on her. I had wondered in the past if her strict catholic school upbringing may have influenced her thoughts on sex as she certainly does not lean to the adventurous side but she never really elaborates much more than saying she simply doesing like something or another related to sex. So, i must take my OH on her word that muff diving is simply too intense for her to enjoy. Any further thoughts?
I use toi have a real aversion to oral sex...i love giving it but hated the thought of my OH doing it to me.
I think i was deeply worried he would some how find me repulsive.
Meeting my husband opened my mind to so much and now I lve nothing more than him giving me oral. I can't say i went form hating it to loving it and it infact took a number of years for me to be comfortable to even be thinking about oral sex for me.
It started with using toys, then him watching me orgasm myself and this over time led me to feel less worried about him being some how replused by me.
All i can suggesst is time, help her to feel relaxed and good about herself.
Thanks for the replies. I was hoping for a magic cure product ;-)
My wife is incredibly stubborn and bullheaded at times so this is probably one of the things I will never get to the bottom of or get her to be comfortable with. In my heart I know that at some point my want for a more fulfilling sex life and my OH's apparent lack of willingness to be more sexual ( not just in receiving oral) will lead to the breakup of our marriage after being together for over 20 years already. I guess their are many guys and girls in a similar situation so it's not unique to me but how the hell does one kerp from straying !
Not everyone likes everything. Does she wish she COULD have oral, but just finds it too sensitive, or is her attitude more like "I'm not really that bothered or interested anyway" ?because either could be your answer. If she just does not like it, or find it a turn on, then bringing it up often and making suggestions to make it more fun for her, may just end up causing resentment.
It sounds like she is telling you she does not enjoy it and that it has little to do with her looks, or worrying about smell or being selfish. It might be down to her past beliefs (Dirty wrong etc) but if she is into many other sexual acts and seems not to be bothered by those, then it seems more like shes tried it a few times in the past and it just rubs her up the wrong way. Some people (men and women included) just do not like it. If her issue is psychological then she is the one that needs to change IF she decides she is not happy with how things are. If she is happy with how things are, she will seek change.
If she is wishing things could be different, then thats different. As she clearly wants to experience it but can't due to being sensitive. I don't know if I would suggest a numbing cream (not healthy for the vagina and also...numb tongue!) I would probably recommend starting with her legs closed and licking her lips instead of clit.
Over the 47 years of our marriage my wife’s responses to oral sex have varied greatly. There have been periods (years) when she would come easily and repeatedly through cunnilingus and similar barren periods where, for no apparent reason, she could not come at all.
After the latest barren period we had a long talk during which I gave her Carte Blanche to give me exact instructions as to what I should be doing and how fast and, if needed, to actually grab my head and put it exactly where she wants it.
She had always been reluctant to do anything like this in the past in case it made me feel inadequate in any way. In fact I find it a big turn on when she takes control of her own pleasure so we are now in a new period of oral orgasms and I get to feel even more submissive when she’s ordering me around.
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and was just too sensitive for her.