After some dirty talk got wheels turning found this toy and it looks like we’re looking for
https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=32956
The reviews look positive, anyone here tried it? Any positions that work best for anal to anal? Some reviews suggest it works fine for this, others say it’s not long / flexible enough.
@Alicia4Ever thanks for your head spinning and very detailed response. It gave me a lot to think about and discuss.
I think we’re still very much in the fantasy of it at the moment but some of those options may make it more likely and comfortable for us to try.
We’ve watched a few videos to get an idea of it and found some stuff that looks fun rather than terrifying. It may be that ATA isn’t the way forward but VTA is a better option for the two of us, noting the warning about making sure we know which side isn’t which!
Thanks again for your help.