I want to learn how to squirt for my husband, I'm a 36yo mother and we've been married for a long time. It's something he always watches on the Internet and I would love to do it for him! I'm after advice on how to do it and any toys or whatever I may need! Please help
I am a natural squirter, though it doesn't always happen. I find it mainly happens when my husband fingers me and works on my g-spot. It can be a weird sensation at first for a lot of people as it feels pretty counter intuitive - it's cognitively similar to peeing I guess and we spend most of our time making sure we don't do that!! My best advice would be relax, let the sensations build, and then when you feel pressure, try and push with your muscles a bit. The g-spot is where the magic happens.
Would you recommend a specific toy, or fingers? When he's fingering me with a couple of fingers quite hard I can feel very wet and even hear 'sloshing' but nothing comes out! I try to push but find it hard as it tickles. Do you push when you orgasm or another time??
There are loads of good blog posts on this, as well as previous threads. If you just search for 'squirting' in the search bar above you'll find them. In my experience however I taught myself, and it has now become a bit of an inconvenience... I keep making puddles in the bed.. Not so pleasant to sleep in, so you have been warned!
The thing most resources wil tell you to do is use your fingers to hit the g-spot by crooking your fingers to rub against the front wall of the vagina. It may take some time to build up liquid by the Skene's Gland in order to squirt. Eventually you might feel the sensaton of needing to urinate, but originating from near the urethra (although I feel it near my clitoris) rather than the bladder. At this point keep going. When the feeling gets the most intense you feel it can go, pushing 'down and out' can help release the fluid that has built up. This may or may not accompany an orgasm. For me it might or might not. I can now squirt through clitoral stimulation, so it will tend to haven with my orgasm, but with internal stimulation alone there isn't an orgasm.
Another thing is that squirting can, like orgasm, can be very psychological. If you are really trying, it can often not help you relax the muscles to let the fluid out. It's similar to performance anxiety issues in men! Try to relax and enjoy as much as possible. If it works great! If not, at least you had fun and there's no mess! :P
Hope this helps in some way!
That's great. It's definatly something we'll try Friday night. That's when kids aren't at home. I try and post on here if anything happens. X
dimmed lights, get him to give you a nice full obdy massage to get you relaxed, let him tease you and build it up. it all about stmulating the clit and g-spot similtaniously :) my girlfriend is slowing starting to experience small squirts.
Sexy shell wrote:
That's great. It's definatly something we'll try Friday night. That's when kids aren't at home. I try and post on here if anything happens. X
Shell if you've still not managed, don't worry your pretty little self. Every woman can squirt! You need to have 100% trust in yourself. You need to be able to talk and be totally open with your partner. The main key is being comfortable. Get your partner to give you a top to toe massage, I mean a good solid massage without missing a single area of your fun and relaxed naked body, when he reaches your lower back just above your bum cheeks he/you should notice 2 dimples at the bottom of your back...makes sure he spends extra effort massaging these dimples. These are your squirting dimples. After a thorough massage, roll onto your back spreading your legs....make sure he has lots of oil of lube. Now he needs to insert his two fingers inside you and locate your G-Spot (when he puts his two fingers in, using a cum here motion, he will feel a rough patch, working your clit with his other hand, slowly build up to him working the cum here motion, you must be totally open and relaxed now, as he applies pressure gradually you'll eventually begin to feel like you need to pee....here you NEED total trust, rather than worrying about peeing, just enjoy the feeling...no matter how much you need to pee,don't stop or worry...you're not going too! Close your eyes he should know how to work your body. When you feel ready to pee, keep him going and let go of that feeling...if you have total trust think about it, the worst that could happen is you're going to pee.....if you're totally comfortable together is that really all that bad, if you think a little pee is the worst that can happen? Before you know it....that pee will have exploded like a fucking bomb....but you'll egaculate a different fluid, not urine! You've just had your first squirting orgasm. You'll feel soaking wet and very tender, if your partner just holds those two fingers in place and presses just slightly you'll feel tremors all over...once he learns you're pressure, just holding or gently pressing will make you go again, you should be smiling all over...I've had woman squirt over and over several times.....before you know it you'll be squirting so hard it's like busting a ballon filled with water over and over again....your ejaculation will be squirting so hard you'll easily be soaking his face, and lying in puddles...its not urine, you'll feel a different texture, let him taste you, taste yourself......a little practice and having complete comfortability with your partner and allowing that peeing feeling to just cum out, let it happen.....I promise you EVERY woman is capable of squirting! It just needs the man to make you feel....even when your going to pee, he can make you feel like well if I do pee who cares.....Comunication, Trust, Relaxation, A Man you can talk to about anything, and lastly a sense of humour ;) add me if you still haven't or think you can't I can help you both out, and no I don't mean joining you...lol xxx
Oh I should have said, if you are worried about urinating, then just go before you get down to business! Simple, if there's no urine in the bladder you can't pee! Simple! :)
You may also find that you do squirt but only a small amount. This is normal, as I've got 'better' at it I have been squirting more and more. Practice makes perfect, so you could even give it a try on your own just to find out what feels good and right before you try with your husband, so you can give hime better direction. For me I may have practised too much... Now my boyfriend is afraid to finger me too much because he finds the puddes annoying... Swings and roundabouts I guess!
As for toys, lots of people reccommend ones particularly designed for the G-spot will probably be the most effective. I haven't hadany experience with that however.
My husband wouldn't mind the puddles but I think it might be me not relaxing enough. I'll give it a try. Thanks
squirting dimples! haha!  Hilarious! 
Not every woman can, or wishes to squirt. What is wrong with a normal, damp orgasm?
Ladies, please don't feel that you need to squirt and don't ever let anyone pressure you. Do what works for you.
Sexy Shell, good luck in your venture, have fun
Well we tried again last night with all the help from you other girls, and although I didn't squirt, I was wetter than ever. It Definately dribbled out when I stood up and both me and my oh loved it! He tasted it for quite a while. And I certainly wasn't complaining! Can't wait till next Friday now! Thanks for all the help!
redkite20 wrote:
Another thing is that squirting can, like orgasm, can be very psychological. If you are really trying, it can often not help you relax the muscles to let the fluid out. It's similar to performance anxiety issues in men! Try to relax and enjoy as much as possible. If it works great! If not, at least you had fun and there's no mess! :P
I second that - like so many things in life, the more you try, the harder it is to accomplish! My advice is just to relax and enjoy the sex/masturbation as much as you can. Sometimes, as said above, it will probably feel like you're going to pee, and (easier said that done) the knack is to ignore that and keep enjoying the sensation. It's so worth it, though!
I squirt naturally, pretty much, but with an irregular pattern - don't do it at all for a while, and then without warning I gush everywhere.
Not every woman can squirt. Just wanted to throw that out there for all the women who have tried and tried and just can't and end up feeling like failures because people keep insisting "every woman can squirt" Can every man squirt? Nope! Some just dribble that cum out and still have just as satisfying orgasms as the guy who hits the lampshades lol.
Anyway, I just wanted to add something that I found particularly useful (and I also helped a woman learn how to squirt by mentioning this. Yet it is something not mentioned often) for me, when I first began attempting to squirt, I would do "all the moves" with dildos and feel "all the feels" I was told I would feel, but nothing ever squirted out of me. I felt like I was having g-spot orgasms, but I wasn't getting the squirting thing that was supposed to come with it. One day, I got so frustrated/annoyed after a long time trying, that I just yanked the toy out of my vagina. As the toy left me, a single sprinkle shot out of me. I was in shock lol
What was the difference? Because when I pulled that toy out of me, I wasnt on an orgasmic high. I was actually annoyed and felt the session was over. Well...when I yanked the toy out of me, a few other things happened:
1) As well as pulling the toy out, I also bore down with my internal muscles to push the toy out
2) The toy was now "out"
These two things I learned were quite important to actually squirting. The first in particular. See, when us females naturally approach orgasm or high amounts of pleasure, we naturally tend to squeeze our PC muscles tight, squeezing around the toy/penis/fingers. This "clenching", I soon discovered, would naturally stop or slow my ability to squirt. The thing is, when that "need to pee" sensation builds, it can be natural to want to clench. What I actually had to do was the opposite of clenching, instead bearing down slightly as though I was pushing a toy out of my vagina, or "opening" my vagina, rather than trying to hold it in. When I was first learning to squirt, I had to bear down with conscious effort, but as time passed and it became "just something I could do" I realised I didn't have to bear down anymore; I simply just had to relax. My muscles then naturally did what they had to do themselves.
Now, when he is using fingers/toys on me with intention to make me squirt, as I approach the peak, I can feel my muscles almost "opening" or "swelling" and if I go with it, I squirt. If I start clenching or tensing, I tend to be able to hold it in...for the most part (As time passes and your body learns to squirt, it can often just take over and be like "Oh this is happening" lol) You need to become aware of your PC muscles and notice the difference between a clench and bearing down. The feeling it not that different but the effects can be! My body can be completely tensed up (and usually is during that kind of intense pleasure) but ...this is going to sound weird....but if you can "relax your vagina" (let the muscles "open" instead of clench) you are 3/4 of the way to squirting. If you don't believe me, go watch some squirting porn and pay close attention to the woman's vagina as she squirts. You will notice many of there vulva's/vaginal entrance seem to "swell". This is because they are letting those muscles push down, or "open".
My second point regarding removing the toy: have you ever watched squirting porn and noticed that 9 times out of 10, the women remove the toy and then squirt? Well, for many of us squirters, it is harder to squirt squirt with something large still inside us. It is still possible, in a leaky kind of way, but a thick toy, or penis, tends to push up against the anterior wall of the vagina constantly and blocks, or pinches shut the exit, so squirting becomes harder or impossible. His fingers (imo) are the best tool for the job, because they are thin enough that he can continue stimulating me without blocking the exit and so I can squirt dramatically with his fingers, not so much with thicker toys.
I hope this helps! It is how I learned to squirt. However, if it doesn't happen, don't stress about it. There are many women who have tried for years and just can't. There are also many women who can't orgasm from oral, or fingers, or penetration. A woman that can orgasm from all types of stimulation is rarer than a woman who needs a few particular kinds. x
Fluffbags wrote:
Well, for many of us squirters, it is harder to squirt squirt with something large still inside us. It is still possible, in a leaky kind of way, but a thick toy, or penis, tends to push up against the anterior wall of the vagina constantly and blocks, or pinches shut the exit, so squirting becomes harder or impossible. His fingers (imo) are the best tool for the job, because they are thin enough that he can continue stimulating me without blocking the exit and so I can squirt dramatically with his fingers, not so much with thicker toys.
I hope this helps! It is how I learned to squirt. However, if it doesn't happen, don't stress about it. There are many women who have tried for years and just can't. There are also many women who can't orgasm from oral, or fingers, or penetration. A woman that can orgasm from all types of stimulation is rarer than a woman who needs a few particular kinds. x
I'd never really thought of it that way, but it rings true. I squirt quite a lot from anal sex/masturbation, when, if I'm clenching with anything, it's my anus, but I'm probably bearing down slightly with my vagina, which is both relaxed, and has nothing inside it as an obstruction. So I squirt freely.
I'd also echo the point that it won't happen for everyone. My ex loved my squirting orgasms and she really wanted to share the experience, but try as she might, and I did everything I could think of to help, it just didn't happen.
Hopefully, if that applies to you (a general you), you can still have fun trying.
Just a thought, but squirting, whilst great in terms of having fantastic orgasms, can also be a real inconvenience! My wife and I have married over 30 years now and are blessed with a great relationship (and great sex!). A couple of years after we got married we were having a long, intense sex session, nothing kinky just vaginal sex, when she had a huge orgasm and squirted a massive gush which soaked her, me, the bed etc.
In those days there was no internet, no forums like this one and generally no real information on squirting. It might have existed then in porn, but we had never seen any porn at that stage (no, really!). As a consequence, my poor wife thought that she had urinated and was really embarrassed about the whole thing. For a month or two it was back to normal, and then, again, she squirted massively, again during vaginal sex (no manual stimulation - we had never heard of G-spots then!). Thinking she was damaged or abnormal in some way she went to her (female) GP for a check-up - unsurprisingly there was nothing wrong with her and, again unsurprisingly perhaps, the GP had no idea what was going on - but I think both of them found it all rather embarrassing.
From about that time she has squirted and gushed during masturbation, manual stimulation and vaginal and anal sex. In fact, she can have multiple orgasms for as long as she has the strength, in some cases 20 or 30 in an hour (really, I kid not), and most of those are accompanied by squirts and gushes. I guess some of you might think that this is some kind of nirvana, especially those women who find it difficult to reach orgasm or would really like to squirt but can't (yet). I'm wondering if the ubiquity of porn has something to do with this idea that squirting is a requirement for great sex, but I guess that's another issue.
Sadly, even though we have a fantastic, satisfying (and varied!) sex life, my wife thinks that she's a freak because of how much she squirts and orgasms, even though I have really tried for many years to reassure her it's ok and perfectly normal (although I'm not really sure that it is, not at these levels). And when we're having sex and she squirts on me, she always apologises, even though it's all fine by me.
And on a practical level it causes some real problems. We have to have rubber undersheets and mattress protectors and typically change the sheets every day, sometimes twice a day. Going on holiday or visiting friends and family is also difficult as we need to bring along our own bedding, towels etc.
I'm guessing that most of the women reading this who squirt can control it in some way, or manage to live with it if they can't. I don't want to 'rain on anyone's parade' here - I guess our situation isn't really that common - but if anyone has a similar condition it would be great to hear it - it's not the sort of thing you can discuss with your mates (!) and although I'm new to posting on this forum it seems a really friendly and sympathetic place, so any thoughts etc. would be welcome!
And apologies for the long post!
Interesting post Adoramus. I started to squirt this year and I was delighted, but since then I find I get the feeling I'm going to squirt even when I don't want to. So I end up having to stop so I don't squirt, or carry on and squirt and I'm not always prepared.
So to others who want to squirt I would say be careful what you wish for! It's great to be able to do it but it's not always controllable once you have learnt how to do it.
I got my wife to squirt quite recently but she has to be very relaxed, it is such a turn on for both of us.
I agree been relaxed is key, my Bed buddy was eager for me to squirt, but I felt too under pressure and couldn't do it, once I told him to pipe down and stop bringing it up mid way through our encounters I started to feel relaxed but didn't get there to start with, but had fun trying, first time was through me on my own and was a total surprise.
But communication, trust and honesty goes a long way! And a sense of humour seemed to help :)
I know people keep saying go to the toilet first and that guarantees it isn't pee, but the bladder never fully empties. Everyone retains between around 20 and 50ml of urine in the bladder, sometimes up to 100ml if you're older and medications, illnesses or even improper emptying technique can mean retaining more. Your kidneys work constantly so it's topping up as soon as you've finished going, which if you ever sit on a toilet and wee, then wait 5 minutes and try to wee again it's surprising how much builds up in such a short time. When applying pressure to the front wall of the vagina puts pressure on the bladder, which can make you feel like you need to pee, ignore that feeling long enough and you will pee, like urge incontinence, so how can any of you be sure you're not actually just weeing because no matter how soon after the toilet you start to play, by the time you're at the point of orgasm there's definitely a good ammount of liquid back in the bladder? Especially if you drink a lot of water it will be clear and have less odour, so it may be you simply don't realise it is actually wee, and if it mixes with vaginal fluids that could cause the smell and taste difference people mention (but then how many have actually tasted wee to know the difference?) To me, peeing myself would be the worst thing in the world, and i'm not being dramtic saying that, i've had OCD about using toilets, germs and especially waste germs for 20 years, i would honestly rather be shot, stabbed etc than pee myself as i see it as an uncleanable substance, i'd have to throw away the matress, the bed frame, and possibly even strip up the carpets and throw those away too.
So as well as tips on how to squirt, does anyone have tips on how to make sure you DON'T? It has frightened me more than a little to read some people do it without meaning to or by accident and i'm worrying i'll end up being one of those people but that it will be wee.
Ok, well I learnt the come hither technique to first make my wife squirt, she of course did all the relaxing etc... but we'd tried everything and did loads of reading up and it took a while for it to happen but once it happened the first time I realized what worked and what didn't, also after the first time she felt the pressure was off and wasn't nervous when she realized how much both of us enjoyed it.....
Then she invested in a nJoy Pure Wand.... what can I say, yes it's expensive but this works fast and everytime.... my wife loves it and even uses it solo. We've tried dozens of toys and this works the best, actually it was the only one that ever made her squirt although now has found that others can work too.
The big thing is relax, take your time and enjoy, don't get down if it doesn't happen.
Or failing that, splash out on the nJoy