My biggest turn on is to watch my wife masturbate in front of me. I have asked her on a number of occasions but she says it is a private & personnel thing, but lately she has started to come around to the idea now saying maybe. How do I get to the next stage of her doing it ? Make her relaxed, bottle of wine etc . Please help any advice greatly appreciated.
I'm no expert, but it might be a good icebreaker if you try masturbating together. Maybe you could try to do it in the same room but perhaps positioned so you are facing away from each other, or perhaps you (probably not both of you) could be blindfolded. Assuming that this is ever going to be a possibility I would be trying to look for ways to reduce her self-concsiousness (is that a word?).
Also in my experience these things are usually easier to do in the heat of the moment rather than cold, it can sometimes feel a little like ordering from a menu. Maybe after some good foreplay you could whipser into her ear how much you would like to see it.
Hope that helps,
Good luck.
perhaps when you are giving her pleasure get her to a certain stage and say to her now you carry on, and let her carry on in front of you, she will already be worked up from what you have done to her so she should want to carry on herself
rach74 wrote:
perhaps when you are giving her pleasure get her to a certain stage and say to her now you carry on, and let her carry on in front of you, she will already be worked up from what you have done to her so she should want to carry on herself
Try this.
Or maybe as your pleasuring her, get her to put her hand on top of yours so you're both masturbating / arousing her together. Then you could always try taking her hand with yours very slowly and reversing it so she is touching herself with your hand guiding hers. That might be a way to get her to feel comfortable with things to start with.
Hope that helps!
maybe start by masturbating each other.
She may be saying maybe just to stop you asking her to do so. If she seems so set on not wanting to then you have to just accept that.
She may feel pressured whenever you ask her to, or she is embarresed to. We all feel comfortable doing different things infront of our partners. My OH won't masturbate infront of me either so i don't ask for him to.
my wife was the same didnt presure her in any way just done the things we normaly do until she was really horny i then swapped my tool for her toy she enjoyed me useing on herself i then said to her whilst toy inserted in herself hold this here a mo whilst i quickly go a loo came back and she was loving herself was a real big turn on for me ...when i asked her how she felt about it she said it was a bit embarrasing but loved every minute and also loved me watching her as she could see it really excited me
I agree with Greenlantern, personally i find it really off-putting to be directly watched, it makes me feel very self-conscious.
If you are busy doing something else she might feel less pressured to 'perform'.
hot_4_more, i like your approach too!
My wife was the same. Than one day whilst i was at work i suggested she send me a pic of her self playing. Once she was comfortable with that, i asked for a short video clip which she was happy to do. She is now more confident to do it.
Hope this helps.
Mr Badger.
My OH doesn't masturbate much and I find it a little sad, I love to watch her. The best solution that we came to was mutual masturbation, not that we do it much. But I do agree with everyone else that said it, mutual is the way to go.
I wrote this on how to introduce sex toys into a relationship. Not sure if it'll help http://nymphomaniacness.com/how-to-introduce-sex-toys-into-a-relationship/
Advice from my female OH,
Try at first by offering her a loving massage, followed by buying her a new toy, for some solo play, (might I suggest the Humdinger!). Then encourage her by complimenting her and offering to use the vibrator on her, before then handing it over to her, while you pleasure yourself for her to watch you. Mutual masturbation is far less intimidating than one person just sat there watching another's intimate moments.
Perhaps try sitting behind her with your legs apart, so she's leaning into you with your arms around her (think of that pottery scene in Ghost!). Slowly lead her hands down there too. After a while, put your hands to other uses (ahh, the inner thighs.. sorry, drifted off there).
That kind of position feels quite intimate and protective, and may put her at ease a little more?