what do you wish your women would do for you? what does is for your man?

my partner and i have been pretty clear early on we would like to start trying something new... neither of us have had the most interesting sex life before meeting each other so we didnt really know where to start... over the past year we've tried new things on and off... ive dressed up, toys, outside, car, anal. BUT here is my problem he wont tell me what he wants to try or likes, i make 98% of the effort, he says he shy about telling me but ive always made it clear he could ask me to dress up like a purple crayon and i would still give it my best i would never make him feel embarssed about what he likes... ive tried most things to get him to open up from watching porn, just trying it, righting down what i like to show him the "weird" stuff is normal!, talking, reasuring him, "sexy box of treats"...

i have no idea what to try now so any advice on what worked for your relationship would be sooooo appreciated and any suggestions what to try next would also be great hearing it from someone else might show him finally make him see its not weird... the best sex, is interesting sex.

thankyouuuuu:)

It took me 20 years to ask my wife to fist me, I know where he's coming from, even though you say he can ask anything it's not that easy, there's probably loads of strange things he may want to do to/with you buy won't ask, just in case/because. You could say I will wear a blind fold and you do whatever you want to me? Anything.

The best advice I can give you is good communication, maybe try going out for a drink/meal away from home and then he might feel relaxed enough to talk about it. Xx

Have you ever asked him to be in charge of the Lovehoney ordering? He can look through the site and add things that he likes the look of to a wishlist. You can then decide which things you'd like to try from his list. X

You could do the Mojo upgrade quiz together? You take the quiz online separately, and it asks you all about different scenarios and kinks, then at the end it only shows you the ones which you BOTH ticked 'yes' to. So in essence, it's risk free, as you can be totally honest and don't have to worry about being judged, as your partner will never find out unless they're up for the same thing. That might help him to open up a bit more.

http://mojoupgrade.com/

Boogaloo wrote:

You could do the Mojo upgrade quiz together? You take the quiz online separately, and it asks you all about different scenarios and kinks, then at the end it only shows you the ones which you BOTH ticked 'yes' to. So in essence, it's risk free, as you can be totally honest and don't have to worry about being judged, as your partner will never find out unless they're up for the same thing. That might help him to open up a bit more.

http://mojoupgrade.com/

Beat me to it Boogaloo, great post.

I'm in a similar position. Our sex life is better than it ever has been (20 years together, 10 years married next week). It was getting a bit repetitive so I tried MojoUpgrade but she wouldn't fill it in, just saying "if you want to try something just say so".

To her credit she's never said no and will happily dress up, be tied up, tie me up, use toys etc. but she's rarely the instigator. She will initiate sex occasionally or be sat waiting in sexy undies, but has never really suggested anything out of the ordinary. If I ask her what she wants to do she can't usually come up with anything. I've found the best way to get a response is to ask if she wants to "do this or that"- and she'll pick one.

She had a bit of a sheltered upbringing so I've kind of come to the conclusion that she genuinely hasn't thought about these sorts of things. I remember one occasion a few years ago I asked what she liked and she bashfully said "I don't know, I like it when you're in charge", so maybe she's just naturally submissive?

Either way she trys anything with enthusiasm and as far as I'm aware she's happy. I'll keep asking, giving her options and hopefully she knows that if she were to want to try something she can suggest it and I'll happily do whatever it is

Me and my husband have been married 6 year's together 7 and half years and have always had a great sex life from the start. I myself have always been a bit shy and needed to be pushed to try new things (my husband has a very dirty imagination!) It's only really been the last few years that we have opened up to each other about our likes and what we want to try and I am so glad my husband made me find my inner devil as I never thought our sex life could get any better. We now have a very good collection of sex toys and really enjoy anal play along with dressing up. And the main thing that I love about my husbands openness and eagerness is that he always makes sure I am happy with what we are doing and not pushing me as all he has ever wanted to do is please me.

Tiger Dick wrote:

Boogaloo wrote:

You could do the Mojo upgrade quiz together? You take the quiz online separately, and it asks you all about different scenarios and kinks, then at the end it only shows you the ones which you BOTH ticked 'yes' to. So in essence, it's risk free, as you can be totally honest and don't have to worry about being judged, as your partner will never find out unless they're up for the same thing. That might help him to open up a bit more.

http://mojoupgrade.com/

Beat me to it Boogaloo, great post.

What he said.

During the throes of passion I once exclaimed how I would like her to take a dildo and bugger me. Some months later we were browsing through the shelves of a fetish shop when my OH came up to me holding the harness for a strapon saying "I want this" with a grin on her face.