Short notice but hubby’s 40th on Sunday. Promised some bondage fun but we’ve not done anything beyond tie up and Denial type teasing. Where to start and any tips on props to get?
Thanks
2 Likes
I like a good blindfold. Then the person tied up has no idea where or when the next touch is coming. Also have things to hand that feel different to run up and down the body- feather tickler, something silky, ice, massage candle to pour wax, something to cause a bit of pain if that’s your thing (I’ve seen rollers on LH)? We like to use a bullet vibrator up and down the body too.
1 Like
Hi @McGlovin. This depends how far you’re both happy and prepared to go really.
From what you’ve already told us, you’re both pretty open minded and comfortable with each other so, without getting too serious and spoiling the mood, discuss what he’d like from you and if you’re prepared to go that far, then go for it.
I hope you both get to enjoy his big birthday x
Like @Shelly24 suggested, sensory play is alot of fun. Blind folds definetly make everything more intense. I rather like silk scalves myself as a sensory toy, they feel amazing flowing over the skin.
Edging, orgasm denial and forced orgasms are some of my favourites. Edging them repeatedly + banning them from masturbating for a few days before a session could be a really good lead up for example. (Which you can also follow up with more edging and orgasm denial once you get them where you want them 
)
Another fun way to do this is with a massage, avoid all the fun bits and work up to teasing them with barely there touches or breath almost in the spots they want.
You could also do this with food play using anything you can lick off them. Fun but messy, can be sticky depending what you use (bringing a wet cloth to wipe them off with after helps)
Different restraints feel very different too. Some are much more intense than others. A good pair of cuffs though is really versatile. Means they dont have to be tied down to be tied up. Lets you do fun things like restrain their hands behind their backs then order them to give you oral (using only their mouth obviously).
Personally I’m very fond of collars. They have a sensation all of their own and a very interesting psychological element to them from both sides of the Dom/sub dynamic. I find they help me get in a good headspace more easily as well.
Power play also doesn’t have to be restraint. Something as simple as ordering someone to strip and get on their knees while you remain clothed and above them (standing or seated) can alter the power dynamic drastically.
You can give orders, be demanding, make someone beg for what they want or demand they earn it first, be proprietorial, make them clear up their “mess” with their tongue. Theres alot you can do with just your voice, attitude and body language (a killer outfit never hurt either)
Toys like floggers can be fun props and sensory tools too, even if you dont want to get into impact play having all the leather dragging over the skin can be very sensual. The implied threat that you might use it, even if you dont intend to.
Anyway, a few ideas (turned out longer than i expected 
). Whatever you pick obviously make sure youve got a safeword. Checking your both up for stuff before hand is also a good idea.
1 Like
It’s a difficult one really… its all according as to how far you are both prepared to go. You can use under bed restraints, door restraints, spreader bars etc. Blindfolds are a must in our play time. Im my husbands sub and he likes me to be very vulnerable when we play and not know what’s happening next although we have negotiated and discussed what I will and won’t do. You can get hog tie sets if you’re feeling a bit more adventurous. I wouldnt suggest rope. Even just bounding wrists and ankles can cause nerve damage if you don’t know how to do it right. (There are plenty of shibari courses and books out there to help with this)
You then need to think about what you want to do once the restraining is done… impact, sensory etc. That’s a whole subject on its own.
I would suggest doing a bit of research together and deciding what it appealing to you both so you’re both getting as much pleasure as each other. 
A whip has to be up there on the bondage must have list!
And nipple clamps maybe 
1 Like
It’s a good question and really the best answer is whatever he (and you) want.
From my perspective I enjoy being tied down and blindfolded. You can then keep it simple by going down on him and riding him. To add to the intensity you could play with his nipples and try a little spanking.
I think a good next step, if you’re both up for it, is a bit of spanking. You could get a paddle/crop or a flogger and that can be tied in (pun intended) with the other things you’ve done to keep it fresh 
but as everyone has said it can go in all different directions so it’s just down to what you and your partner are comfortable with
1 Like
It’s more likely me (F) that’ll be tied
1 Like
We tried spanking before and I really wasn’t into that, not on my bum anyway, other places I don’t mind a bit of impact but, maybe weirdly, didn’t enjoy the spanking.
1 Like
That’s the great bit about taking the journey together, finding out what you both do and don’t like together 