So I've been dating this fantastic guy over the past 2 months, and while we've had sex and seen each other naked for the most part - I've been careful (I think) to hide my right butt cheek out of view because I have a massive red birth mark there which I'm really self conscious about! When I say massive, I mean it is slightly bigger than my hand.
Anyhow, we will ge going on a sexy weekend getaway, but I have a feeling he's probably going to see everything this weekend. He's a great guy, and I'm sure he'd just laugh it off or tell me not to worry, but I'm still incredibly self conscious and I'm not sure how to bring it up?
I'm arriving at the hotel first, and was going to surprise him wearing something sexy... but what do I say? "btw, before you take me from behind - just a little FYI.. I have an ugly birthmark"
I know the longer I've let it wait, the more awkward I'd feel - though on his part, he'll wonder why I was hiding it for so long. I KNOW that once I get it out in the open, I'll feel a lot better about it (because I also know he will tell me not to worry and that I'm being silly). But how do I bring it up, as its already been just over 2 months and I think it will be slightly awkward.. help!
bless you .. id honestly just bring it up while youre chatting and maybe after a glass of wine or something so youre a lil more relaxed an can just .. get it out there x
Chances are he's probably already seen it even though you think you have done a good job of hiding it. If he's as great a guy as you say he is the he won't mind. If your getting to see him before this weekend bring it up then. Tell him you change wait to spend all weekend in bed with him but your just a bit self conscious about it. X x
Ive been in exactly the same boat as you, when i was 3 i was hospitalised with cancer and during that time i had an abcess in my back and had to have it removed. Its a smallish scar on my side and when i met my husband i was so scared to show him, so i hid it for about a month.
He had noticed it but didnt want to ask about it until i was ready and of course id worried about it for nothing.
Im sure he weill be really understanding too, i was chicken and i text him about it but what Naughty and Ruby have said are great ideas or if you cant tell him before hand im sure hell be so besotted with you he wont even notice and you can tell him after if your afraid of putting a dampner on things? but it might be easier just getting it out with the other ideas first so you feel at ease :) x
But how do I bring it up, as its already been just over 2 months and I think it will be slightly awkward.. help!
Don't then. Act as if it's entirely normal.
Because it is.
And now you have an opportunity to begin to believe and accept it.
I have a 13 inch scar going right up my belly. Can't be missed. Those lovely moments of exploring a new partner's body isn't when I'll be wanting to get into a discussion about major surgery and the doctors' eff ups which lead to my needing it. So if it hasn't come up before then I plan on just saying something like "yeah, yeah, that was x years ago. I'll tell you about it later' and then snogging him.
It's all about perception and atitude. If you act like it's a big deal, he'll either go along with you and think it's a big deal or he'll be forced to try to convince you that it's not. If he does the latter, believe him.
You don't have to bring it up :) my friend has large dark purple birthmarks kinda like how you described all down the front of her thigh - not so easily hidden. But although she doesn't like them, she just gets them out (so to speak) never bothers trying to hide them and no one has ever said anything bout them, and she is a very hot and sought after girl. (I know that sounds weird haha).
I have scars on my boob , palms, butt, neck, and leg that I'm self conscious about to an extent but I never bring them up to people - they don't need to be explained or justified. Ones in the place where my tailbone *should* be and my boyfriend first saw it when he did me from behind. He asked me after and I just explained. He might ask you in case he thinks its a burn mark or scar but he will probably love your birthmark as it is a part of you :) x
And NN is right, he's probably already seen it anyway! Relax x
Not to worry. I have a white birth-mark the size of a 5-10p coin (depending on the state of arousal haha) smack bam right in the middle of my willy!!! No one since young school days has ever said anything.
Also worked with a girl once who had a fist sized one in her forhead, but she did her fringe in a way so it looked like a cool hairstyle. Took me two years to notice it wasn't actually her hair.
Birthmarks are charming, and more importantly, unique. And no tattoo could ever match them
I wouldn't bother saying anything just act normal as it is a normal thing- I'm sure he will not be bothered and if he is then it will show how shallow he is! It is part of you so if he likes you he will like the birthmark! ;)
Cheryl cole has a huge tattoo now covering her bum but for me a bums a bum no matter what's on it. I still think Cheryl's ass is fit. Chill out about it. Believe me when I say feel and amount of wobble matter to me. That's how I measure ass.
dont worry about it i have one on my right cheek to it is a big one nobody has ever said much about it even in high school we had to shower together. your mate will probally love shooting his cum all over it if i had that chance to i would
personally .... when its time to get kanoodly ..... do the slow undress action and then bend over and sway your gorges butt pointing into his view with hay check out my birth mark....let him take in your perfect booty and then twirl around and lower ur devilish top assets upon his longing face, getting him to get lost in between your bosoms... u be having him begging for mercy ;) u will need to tie him down if u dont want him to touch thou.....
It's the sort of thing I'd bring up in casual conversation.
"Ughh and then growing up I was really self conscious about this birth mark on my butt which was crap... yeah the birthmark on my butt cheek... have you not noticed?"
But how do I bring it up, as its already been just over 2 months and I think it will be slightly awkward.. help!
Don't then. Act as if it's entirely normal.
Because it is.
And now you have an opportunity to begin to believe and accept it.
I have a 13 inch scar going right up my belly. Can't be missed. Those lovely moments of exploring a new partner's body isn't when I'll be wanting to get into a discussion about major surgery and the doctors' eff ups which lead to my needing it. So if it hasn't come up before then I plan on just saying something like "yeah, yeah, that was x years ago. I'll tell you about it later' and then snogging him.
It's all about perception and atitude. If you act like it's a big deal, he'll either go along with you and think it's a big deal or he'll be forced to try to convince you that it's not. If he does the latter, believe him.
dotdashdot wrote:
It's the sort of thing I'd bring up in casual conversation.
"Ughh and then growing up I was really self conscious about this birth mark on my butt which was crap... yeah the birthmark on my butt cheek... have you not noticed?"
I'd either bring it up pretty much like that, or not say anything and do what rose hip suggested, depending on how you feel/ whether you feel you have the right moment to bring it up :)
I wouldn't stress too much, discovering things like that on my OHs body makes it more special for me because it's like he's more mine because I know that about him/know it's there, and he's let me see it :)
hope that makes some kind of sense, I'm v tired! x
As others have said, he has probably seen it already. If he's anyhting like me and probably a lot of other guys on here, he would be checking you out all over every time you get up out of bed!
Also - as others have said again - just roll with who you are and what you got.
I also like Rosehip's advice about bringing it up totally casually. Enough of the sneaking around hiding your ass!
