How has the Christmas festivities gone @anna.michelsburg
Everything seems to have gone quiet from @anna.michelsburg which is a shame but she must have reasons why that is. I hope she is well and doing ok.
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Still here. Have been reading but just not found the moment to catch up and not had a massive amount of news. Sorrrryyyy.
Am crafting an update. Will post shortly.
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Its great you have not forgot all of your fans. I hope you had a great Christmas and New year. Look forward to your updates.
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Why does it matter how many people you’ve slept with? More importantly, why does it matter if it’s more than a man’s?
Sounds great fun, go for it 
if I had the energy I would join you! 
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PS update please. I just read all 330 comments on the train journey home. Tremendous.
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Glad to see you’re still here, and as @steve19 says, I hope you had a great Christmas and New Year.
Looking forward to the update 
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OK. Sorry. So long to reply.
Excuses first:
I now have a boyfriend. The intensive care consultant - who is called Mark - is now my boyfriend and I am being (mostly) good.
I have also been busy with the kids and am back in the office most of the week so fewer WFH days.
So the points are only being accumulated slowly.
But we are having a lovely time together but it means much less to update here and much less time to get stories which I can share on here. Sadly.
So even though it has been ages I don’t have much for you all, I am sorry to say. I do have some things to tell though - a little uncomfortable I am afraid, but here goes.
We ‘officially’ started dating at the start of December or even a little before. We have had a few chats about fidelity and I was very clear that I couldn’t tolerate him being unfaithful. I admitted that it was hypocritical after some of the things we had tried but I wanted to be honest and wanted him to hear.
We didn’t quite come down so firmly on me and other men and maybe left the door open for ‘fun’ at some undefined point in the future but he was equally clear about me getting fucked by others while we were dating … it wasn’t on.
It never really sat comfortably and had been on my mind. Partly because I have honestly never been faithful, as I think I have hinted here, with any boyfriend and partly because he has licked another man’s cum out of me shortly after I have had been fucked, while he waited. It seemed to me that he wanted to have his slutty Anna cake but not eat it!
At the start of the new year a Bumble date sort of happened. It was someone who had been circulating for a while but Christmas had intervened.
The weekend after the Bumble date Mark was over for the weekend, the kids were at their father’s, and he knew I had been for a ‘coffee’ with someone and it was in the air. He didn’t ask for a little bit but as we settled in to Netflix on Friday he asked at about 10 on the Friday evening.
I had actually planned to tell him on Saturday but seen as he asked I confessed. I told him that I had been on a casual date and had sex. The details were fairly … erm shocking. I had taken it bare and had anal sex too.
I think he was planning questions around whether my bra had come off but ended up hearing how I got properly fucked. I didn’t plan on being that slutty, honestly.
I hope you all don’t mind this confession, it is sort of the point of this thread that I tell the truth.
I actually don’t enjoy anal sex that much but do enjoy my ass being taken when the mood is right. edited by mod
Mark was obviously unhappy about it. There were a a few questions then lots of silence. We didn’t make love that night nor the following morning, the first time that has happened since we started seeing each other. Saturday and Sunday were both very awkward, we were pleasant and did nice things together and so on, met another couple on Sunday for lunch, things like that, but it was tense.
We didn’t row but I knew he was unhappy. I actually cried a little with him on Saturday and Sunday morning. I resisted saying sorry but I did feel very guilty and he was giving me those sort of ‘distant’ hugs as I cried. There were also some some difficult occasional questions, the obvious ones like did I cum and if I swallowed any (yes to both) and the less obvious ones which were more difficult, did I think about Mark at all (yes, but still wanted sex), and had I planned sex when I went out (yes), and worse of all did I ask for it bare (yes), he was very unhappy about that.
I honestly thought it might be the end and we were still not through it but on Monday morning, before he left, he snuggled up as I was dozing and cupped a breast edited by mod We cuddled with him still inside me and he said sorry for being so difficult, he was falling in love with me, and was a bit scared. We both had a snuggle.
I have not dated anyone or done anything else since. But I still have the ‘one a week’ challenge and also don’t know that I am ready to settle down properly. I feel very conflicted.
However, since then, things have been lovely with Mark and we have booked a holiday in May which I can’t wait for.
In other news Sophie is still with her boyfriend.
The one a week thing seems to have one the trick for both of us.
But we are both really unsure now about our planned holiday in June were we anticipating some lovely summer casual sex.
In more other news, the naughty little office clerk is certainly the naughty clerk and is being fucked by the partner of my previous post. And … the boyfriend isn’t a boyfriend but is a husband. When she told me I actually had to put my hand over my mouth in shock. Thoughts?
What else can I tell you all?
Sorry about the fairly graphic update. You did all want to know, I hope?
Anna
P.S. Apologies for the very rude sections which have rightly been edited. I am trying to find my naughty writing style and it probably got a bit too explicit.
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Welcome back Anna, and belated Happy New Year 
Great update, love the honesty and reflections as always, and nice to hear things are kind of settling and working out really what it is you’re looking for right now.
Sounds like it was an awkward moment, and feelings involved on both parts to an extent?
Ha ha yes, great to hear all the updates, I’m sure plenty others also been waiting to hear back.
Hope it all works out for you, whichever direction you decide to go in, and lovely to hear you’re in a good head space and likely to make the right choices for you.
Naughty little office clerk is interesting, clearly hubby not quite doing it for her, or she has an ulterior motives with the partner? or maybe a little power fetish. Maybe the marriage is more a money thing, or perhaps they’re both quite open in the marriage. Who knows, but sounds like she’s having fun either way.
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Hi @anna.michelsburg its lovely to read the update. I am so pleased things are working out with the consultant. It sounds like this will become a great relationship be careful with your future actions. I really hope you can come to some sort of compromise where everyone is happy and comfortable. You remain a remarkable lady. Thank you for the update and I wish you all the best in the future.
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Good luck for the future…
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Sorry if this sounds blunt, but it sounds like you need to lay out exactly what is and isn’t allowed in your relationship and stick to it.
You told him you won’t allow him to have sex with other women, and he said the same to you. But then you have sex with another man and (albeit after some hardship) he relents to at least have sex with you. In my opinion, if he has sex with another person you don’t have a leg to stand on as you broke this pact first. Yes he sounded like having his cake and eating it, but back then you were just casual, and people act differently once committed. If you do want complete fidelity from him, but you can’t give back yourself, it may be better to cut loose now and find someone more open to open (even if just on your side) or it could lead to heart ache.
As I said, just my opinion! I’m still rooting for your 1 a week, and for you to beat Sophie! These things always get more complicated when feelings get in the way 
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I think this is 100% correct and 100% the dilemma I face ,which is what I was trying to get across.
I don’t want to be the cheating girlfriend who becomes the toxic, damaging relationship he looks back on with bitterness. But I also don’t want (yet) the dutiful, monogamous relationship he probably wants.
1-a-week was supposed to get my mojo back. It did. I have loved the casual, slightly clumsy, perhaps occasionally regrettable sex. In part because it is the kind of thing I “shouldn’t do”. I just have not worked out what I want for the next phase of my life and he has rather come along at slightly the wrong time.
But I should be faithful if my partner in a committed relationship wants me to be, you are right.
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Might just be me or a steroptype but I always think it’s easier for women to go out and find sex / get laid / add a man to their list. My wife has said something similar too. Men go out looking and very rarely find a woman to have sex with. But I feel that a woman could quite easily and quite often.
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@Fire_Ice1 I would agree entirely with this sentiment too, and from when I was single dating apps were full of men wanting FWB type scenarios, and very few women looking for similar - those that were (are) are generally spoilt for choice. Years ago, was on a fabulous swinging site, and was saturated with men. I wasn’t interested in swinging as such and was single, but thought would be good place to find like minded kinksters. So no, don’t think just you or stereotype, think it is reality…
@anna.michelsburg I’d say the intervention as it were with Mark is likely to have happened for a reason, a fork in the road perhaps? As @WelshDragonette said, has to work both ways (or at least be a scenario both are happy with - have seen threads on here before around one sided openness in relationships, but I’d expect can get complicated with feelings involved!)
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Thank you.
If forced to comment, I perhaps feel that suggestions of professional help arising from the spectrum of normal sexual behavior is not quite what I was hoping for when I decided to start a no holes barred story of a new divorcee working through what a happy future looks like.
The comment about never having faithful could perhaps have been qualified. I don’t really wish to go in to every mistake I have made but there are many variations on ‘normal’ relationships and I have had boyfriends who have encouraged, enjoyed, acquiesced, and struggled with my approach to casual sex. I have also had partners who have not known.
I honestly don’t know any woman my age who has never stepped outside a superficial definition of monogamy and I know plenty who currently have long text based internet affairs with limerent objects, or where they enjoy being the limerent object. Is that more or less honest than me?
I am certain that you had no intention to offend and, to reassure, I am not offended. But I do feel that women should not be encouraged to seek professional help for talking honestly about their sexuality. An erroneous pathological approach to normal female and sexual attitudes is something best left at the Bullingdon Club, I suggest.
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This is a good point. Once I decided to do the challenge I found it unbelievably easy to meet men and progress ‘matters’. But I don’t think there is any mystery to it, I just chatted to anyone who chatted to me and had an open mind to who fucked me.
I have only really chased one or two, I guess. At the start it was the gardener, more because I liked the fantasy of sucking him off after accidentally letting him see my breasts in the garden. The other was the posh twit from the wedding who turned out to be engaged. Neither entirely suitable for anything long term.
As I come out of the 1-a-week era I have noticed that I chat less frequently, hardly ever flirt, and am getting far fewer opportunities. It is interesting that it something that is very easy to turn on and off.
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And …
Just had a lovely weekend with Mark.
Nothing more than that.
I need to add up all the points though.
I did add up how many different cocks had been inside me since I started this. Oh my.
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Get professional help was qualified with “if this is something you want”.
I presume, therapy would be helpful if you felt you wanted a monogamous relationship and didn’t want to “cheat”. We all make choices and boundaries that suit us; you don’t have to explain those and what works for you, will be very different for the next person.
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I only picked up this topic over the last couple of days so I haven’t read every post, but I think I’ve got the gist of it. I thought it was a very entertaining and exciting story and you shouldn’t feel bad about what you’ve done. At the time you enjoyed and needed the newfound freedom. To be honest, there have been times in my life over the last few years when I’d have loved to have met someone like you and shared those experiences. Sometimes we all need to get things out of our system, and while there may have been some occurrences you might not repeat now, look back on them in years to came and smile!
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