Confession time: We are so open about everything when its comes to sex. We’ve often talked about our fantasies. But I’ve got a couple that I’m not sure I’ve got the courage to tell him. I’m worried he’d think I was a freak or something. Or that he’d think I’d actually want to make them come true (which I really don’t!)
Anyone relate or am I on my own with this one?
There’s nothing wrong with having secret fantasies, I have a few rolling around my brain cells. Whether or not they get spurted out during naughties or they come to life… I’ll have to wait and see
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with keeping some fantasies a secret.
I felt the same about my fantasies, that he would laugh and think they were daft, or that I was freak too. But one day I plucked up the courage and told him about them, and I’m glad I did cos our sex life is totally amazing since I told him.
No there’s nothing wrong with that 
Especially if they’re things you don’t actually want to try, you’re not losing anything by not telling him.
But if you do want to tell him you can explain you don’t actually want to do them and he will probably understand because he’s got similar things he finds sexy but doesn’t want to do 
The very few fantasies I have left unfulfilled involve things we are already doing being pushed a little further but, since she has already changed so much for me in the last couple of years, I would never dream of mentioning the fantasies to her.
I have quite a lot of fantasies, most of which I wouldn’t mention to my OH. Most of them I wouldn’t share with anyone and they are definitely best left in my head. I’ve mentioned some of my BDSM fantasies to my OH but he’s not interested so I have stopped talking about those and they will remain a solo fantasy. I did mention my fisting fantasy which he was surprisingly positive about although it’s going to take a long time before I’d be ready to try.
It’s normal to have fantasies that you would rather keep private and nothing to feel guilty about. Maybe you could work up to telling him about them? Just make it clear that they are just fantasies and you wouldn’t want them to actually happen. Maybe you could then use them as “dirty talk” during sex.
Always need some fantasies left behind like a bucket list it should never be completed and if you don’t want to tell OH some of them then that’s fine I think everyone has at least one they don’t intend on sharing
It can be such a hard and difficult thing having sexual desires and fantasies that you would love to share with a partner but worried that they would or approve etc.
From my own personal experience I was very lucky with my ex partner because she was always up for mostly anything, to be honest she even surprised me in a very huge way with one of her own suggestions she told me about when we had only been dating for 7 months.
But sometimes some desires and fantasies are just best kept that way and to yourself unfortunately.
Oh definitely. Not so much because they’re weird, but because I don’t want him to think that he has to act on it. Just one of those things that I like the idea, but bringing it to fruition would honestly ruin it for me.
I have some fantasies that I would be happy to tell my OH but also some I feel like I shouldn’t. I think most people will have some kind of fantasy they keep to themselves. It’s totally normal in my opinion. Maybe ask him if he has any. If he opens up, use that chance to open up too. Mutual fantasy amnesty ha ha
Have loads of fantasies, some I’ve told my OH about and we’ve made reality (or our version) and some I haven’t told her - we’ve come a long way and I’ve lived things with her I never thought would happen so I’m happy not to push a lot more.
I don’t have any that I haven’t told my partner but that’s probably just because I find it very easy to talk about things with him.
I did find out very recently that he had been holding back on alot of fantasies. He was brought up being told men were dirty, vulgar and awful for being so sexual and that he was good and didn’t feel any of those things… It made him very repressed, which he is quite angry/upset about now (he feels like he missed out on a lot of experiences, there was a lot of neglect and emotional abuse). He has opened up about a few fantasies recently but it didn’t last too long before he put his shield back up.
Many of my fantasies tend to be rough related or kinky with uniforms lol
Plenty sadly! I go through phases of fantasies. Right now I’m craving sex with an escort
But they also include to be pegged, dominated, to give a blowjob, to have sex with a man and that’s just naming a few.
Even when my wife was active there were plenty of my fantasies back then I would never tell her . As I got older my fantasy list grew . Many I would never actually do , but they do fuel the fire . All the years we were together I did not know she wanted to play with my ass . Just a few years before she lost her sex drive we had been out partying hard and when we got to the hotel room we were having quite a cornucopia of sex . We were in the 69 as I lapped up our mixed juices and out of no where she roughly inserted a finger in me . It was a bit of a surprise . Turns out she had wanted to forever but when sober did not ever tell me . That lead to a fair number of years of me being submissive and her penetrating me with multiple toys .
Snowballing. I think it could be sexy, but I remember the wife saying “ewwww” very loudly when it happened on a TV show, so I don’t think its worth even asking
The only fantasy I have that I haven’t talked to her about is that classic threesome with the (18+) babysitter scenario. I don’t think we’d ever go through with something like that, although she is bisexual and once in our early dating years it seemed like we both had a strong interest in the same girl at a party, but nothing came of that and we never really spoke of or acknowledged it.
The main one I don’t and can’t tell my OH is my love of BBW porn. My partner is someone who’s at the gym every day, her body is really toned. Ironically although I find that asthetic appealing I also find BBW women appealing too. I don’t particularly understand why as you’d think that doesn’t add up 
I had 2 BBW girlfriends in the past. It really did make me think about my own views on the way my partner looks.
I think in society finding “bigger” people attractive is becoming more accepted but in the past the stereotype was a slim/toned body is the most desirable. I think this proves the stereotype is definitely not the case. Nonetheless I can’t exactly speak to my girlfriend now about it!
Of course! I’m happy to have the fantasies in my head and no desire to bring them to real life. My partner knows I’m into monsters and I’ve gave him a few examples of which ones I like, but kept the other weirder ones to myself 
Ironically, my husband and I have been able to talk to each other about more stuff now we’re separated than when we were together. For example, in all our 11 years together, he never ever knew that I wondered what it would be like to have sex with a woman. It was only when a friend posted something on Twitter & I said to him “damn she’s hot” and he laughed. Told my husband and we ended up having a lengthy chat about it