Ive always liked the idea of a collar and lead but never owned one before. Does anyone have any tips or suggestions for using them solo?
Im new to bondage so the only ideas ive come up with currently are tying it off (using quick release knot) to something (i was thinking bedpost). Or trying some pet play with it.
I know actually wearing a collar has a sociological psychological (stupid auto correct xD. ) Element to it too, and though im missing a Dom i have a decent imagination which im hoping will work reasonably well.
If anyone has any, id be grateful for other ideas (seriously open to all suggestions) As im really new to this so probably less creative with restraints.
Any safety tips anyone has would also be really useful. Ive googled it and know not to tug against it (whiplash is bad) and to leave a 2 finger gap (Because i like breathing). Is there anything else i should watch out for?
Hi @Green_Eyed_Girl, I can’t add any advice as I’ve not tried this yet but I’ll be interested in watching this thread as a collar is something that appeals to me for solo play too. It’s the psychological element that appeals most to me rather than the restraint side.
I’m actually thinking of getting a collar with attached nipple clamps or even one of the harness ones with nipple / labia clamps like these:
Not sure if nipple clamps appeal to you or not but I thought I’d drop in the suggestion!
I absolutely love collars and have a good collection of them(havent worn one for abit but will do soon).
If you are interested in pet play you could attach the lead handle to a fixed point while in pet mode and the physical restraint of only being able to go so far until you are stopped by the lead could be imagined as a dom keeping you close by.
Just walking around with the weight of the lead pulling on the collar whether you are walking and its dangling down or crawling and its dragging along the floor behind you should create some good feelings via the collar.
I would also suggest a chain lead(pet store ones are great) as they are more weighty and the cold steel can be nice against skin etc
Could also carry the handle in your teeth as a pet or sub as though you are taking it to your dom or just to keep your mouth occupied while you crawl around the room.
Could get a more “fashionable” choker or collar that you can wear outdoors, attach the lead and go for a walk(covered up if necessary), could thread it down your sleeve and hold the handle in your hand. Gentle pressure on it to remind you its there.
Imagining your dom is holding the other end as you walk
Hi @Green_Eyed_Girl
I love collars/leads! And use them solo around the house! Similar to what @zombifiedguy has said, wearing one walking around creates a sensation from the lead dangling and moving with you.
Personally, I like to incorporate it into how I dress, if I wear a plunge bodysuit, the collar looks like a thick choker and the lead can go down the bare chest and be tucked into the body suit to look like a harness, if the lead is quite long, it’s nice tying it round your waist and that holds the collar in place.
If your doing solo play, one thing I’d recommend, put the collar on and tie the lead to something nearby, like headboard, table leg and that gives the illusion it’s being held or pulled on to keep you in place while you have some you time, be careful though, never tie it above the head in case you choke yourself or can’t untie it, but have some fun! Experiment with different things and be creative! Even if an idea doesn’t work out, you tried it and it can be fun!
I have a collar and chain but I have it attached to the loop of my anal hook. I wear the combination when I’m in full sub mode such as shaving, licking and rimming my wife. I have worn it all day when ordered to do so. I love the way it feels as I move, sit or stand.
Thanks for the great pet play suggestion @zombifiedguy, its not something ive tried before but it sound like fun so im going to have a go Definitely going try some of those. Thanks for all the description too, its great to hear what its actually like to wear one.
Getting something passable as jewellery could definitely work, might even have a choker somewhere i could try it out with. Sadly dont think i could get away with a day collar type round here, but a choker would be doable.
@Kitty-Cat01 i like the idea of the ones with nipple clamps, but im always a bit nervous they’ll be super strong. Ive got a couple of pairs in my bag, the shades of grey ones with a chain and the basic hoop Pair (which i actually love and use regularly). I can only do them so tight though. tight pinch is fine but when they start to actually hurt i have to stop.
@MissNoir thanks for the safety tips. Will make sure to be careful. was thinking of tiying it on with ribbon So i can do a knot i can just pull open quickly one handed. Seemed safer than looping it through the strap.
Also great lingerie combo. Not a catsuit person but that sounds really cool.
Sounds like alot of fun. that kind of predicament play appeals to me, but i think i’ll have to work up to it . as much as i keep browsing the anal hook section (you mentioned them in the diary a while ago and i was curious. Slippery slope) i think for me, starting slow is probably best. especially as i am solo, so need to be extra careful safety wise. Something for later though
As long as you get adjustable ones you should be fine, they can be worn with a very light pressure which isn’t at all painful. I like to use them quite tight for short periods of time but lightly for longer wear. If you wanted to share the links for the ones you’re considering I’m happy to give you my opinions x
Edit: just realised that you meant that you already have some rather than thinking of getting some! Sorry!
Once you start you will realise there are many possibilities. I went from a basic leather one upto stainless steel and even a few neck chains with a padlock. My past sub had leather, rubber and a steel one too.
Each has their own benefits and pros such as being worn in the shower, being less obvious, being more noticeable to yourself(weight etc)
Many general “goth/punk” style chokers are popular day wear and usually go less noticed with an outfit. Lately there was a surge in people wearing leather chokers with various rings so those are usually acceptable in public. Could look for something abit more secure etc, maybe a padlock closure. Imagine your dom has sent you shopping and locked your collar on but kept the key with him so it cant be removed until you get home.
Still at consideration stage, suggestions very welcome. I like the dominix leather ones atm . (Also all the pretty fancy ones, because im a magpie) there are also some nice bondage boutique ones too. but don’t know whether i should get something more basic incase its not for me.
Chain leads also look good (@zombifiedguy thanks for the tip) but i worry they will be noisy (shared house, etc etc). Anyone How much sound to they make when you move around with them?
I love the idea of a jewellery style collar! I’m a bit of a closet goth (my OH doesn’t really approve and I don’t think it would go down well at church either!). I’m definitely going to look for one when I have the opportunity to get dressed up post covid!
What are you thinking? You can get jewelry that can be locked on with discreet methods but there are simpler options. Could just cover up a collar with a black neck scarf or fabric band accessory/neck wear
There are thin metal band collars that can pass as a neclace
Not really sure yet, something that could pass as jewellery. I’d probably wear it as part of an outfit with a corset, skirt and heals. I’d probably be looking for something with a bit of a pattern on it since I’m a magpie like @Green_Eyed_Girl so I like pretty things! I’ll have to have a look around. I kind of like the idea of a leather one but a metal one that could pass as a necklace might be a better option initially. This needs some research!
Theyr definitely out there. Ive seen diamonte ones and things that look like jewellery but are desighned to be strong. Like @zombifiedguy said, theres also this fashion for wearing restyled harnesses and collars atm. Light leather chokers with rings. So if all else fails, just claim its trendy
I’ve just had a look on Google and found a few that I like, one leather one looks amazing but I don’t think I’d be confident enough to wear that out yet. I’ve seen another one which is leather but has a chain and heart at the front so it looks somewhere between a choker collar (like ones you can get for dogs - just want to add that I’m not a fan of these for dogs, looks a bit cruel but I might be wrong) and a necklace. Not sure that’s a very good description! It doesn’t look like LH have many “day collars”.
Etsy might have some good possibilities. Some steel ones can be expensive but will be built to last and at a higher quality.
Turian or eternity styles can pass for jewelry.
If you are a crafty soul then you could even design or make your own. Look for people who can make what you want at a reasonable price
Loads of possibilities. They can be as simple as you like. Aslong as it gives you what you want/need then thats what matters. Can always upcycle a belt or something similar into a collar or that chain lead you found, cut some bits off, add a closure or use the spring clip and voila.
This would probubly work ass a day one. Remove the nipple clamps (not sure theyd be allowed in tescos ), get a bit of something sparkly with a catch (repurposed keychain ornament might work) or dismantle some old jewellery for a glass drop ornament. Would look nice. This set is also an option, but im not so keen on the lace myself. Very pretty though.
Both have chains with catches at the ends which is really useful.
Similar to what 
Definitely going try some of those. Thanks for all the description too, its great to hear what its actually like to wear one.
Sorry!
), get a bit of something sparkly with a catch (repurposed keychain ornament might work) or dismantle some old jewellery for a glass drop ornament. Would look nice.