Bi curious

Hello. Many years a go I used to be extremely bi curious, I tried to meet up with guys to experiment but turned myself away at the last minute. I've only ever got myself off together in bed with a friend that's as far as I got.

So I'm just wondering if other people on here have had the same thoughts or if any people got further than me?

Will look forward to reading your stories.

I had those thoughts years ago, started by watching bi porn, then progressed to telephone chat lines, just talking at first then meeting, simple oral and playing was the normal for a while.

As I got more at ease anal was introduced with me topping.

im now a member of a gay and bi dating website and have tried most things and I’m even into crossdressing, I also meet dressed up at a popular gay dogging site near me

Hey Newport, thanks for the reply 😊

It's good to know that it worked out for you! How long did it take you to get into all that if you don't mind me asking?
And I'm not really attracted to guys looks wise, just down below 😲

Any other advice there?

I've had sex with men - but without really ever being curious about it...the first time I just really wanted anal, so a bi friend obliged...and then other opportunities arose which I thought would be interesting...I've been propositioned by a lot of guys over the be honest, men don't do anything for me...but the encounter itself can be erotic, if you see what I mean...if I was at a fetish club and someone I liked or knew wanted to have a quick go, or some scene developed, I'd be fine...saying that I've had nights absolutely ruined by guys I didn't know trailing after me whinning for sex...the last three times I was at torture garden, which possibly contributes to my iffy feelings about the place...

I've considered maybe popping out to a gay club and having a night of no strings sex but aren't super driven...

It's interesting in that - I'd find casual sex easier with a man...I really like women and wouldn't be able to bring myself to just use a woman for sex, even friends who were up for it...whereas a random guy I'd have no problem...I do know that guys are emotional creatures too etc...but I just wouldn't feel terribly bad about it...I think with a woman, if I liked her enough to want sex then I'd probably also want a relationship...

Yes both me and my husband have long been "bi curious" or in our case, actually bi. Took a long time to work things out actually, but now we are there, we are having fun.

In my experience, you are right to back out if you don't feel comfortable, as you could put yourself off bi experiences for ages.

If you are interested about how we got where we are, there are a couple of posts on my blog (which are called "Sexuality Surprise") which go into more detail. (Obviously, read part one before part two)

This is some really helpful information everyone has been giving so far, I much appreciate it! 😊 I will definitely read your blog Link that sounds like an ideal read so I will read that shortly and give you feedback on that!

Another thing, if my girlfriend was interested would potentially having a 3some with another guy be a good way to go so there's potential ground rules set and in a comfortable environment?

Jimbo1992 wrote:

This is some really helpful information everyone has been giving so far, I much appreciate it! 😊 I will definitely read your blog Link that sounds like an ideal read so I will read that shortly and give you feedback on that!

Another thing, if my girlfriend was interested would potentially having a 3some with another guy be a good way to go so there's potential ground rules set and in a comfortable environment?

Yes, that is certainly the way we have chosen to go, but I realise that is not for everyone. You have to have a very good relationship for that to work. Some here (like us) do, and so that can be really good.

I would advise not running into a threesome, or regular threesomes, without real consideration - not saying you would. As KinkyMara says, it can really work in strong relationships...but...I've also seen it cause a lot of problems and breakups...

I have always been sceptical about threesomes as I don't think I am comfortable was more of just an idea just to see what potential options I may have as my curiousity is most certainly back on the rise again more recently. Just difficult to know the correct way if going about it.

But I really appreciate the help you lot! 😘

If you feel you want to experience it whilst in a relationship perhaps an option is to make it more anonymous - rather than at home...

It depends what experience you're looking for but maybe some club, 5 or 10 minutes with a willing but unknown guy while your girlfriend watches or touches only you...

Obviously, it all depends what your girlfriends feelings are about it all...

Yeah I know it's something we have talked about in the past and she wasn't totally against it! So there is potential down that route. I have a few bi / gay friends is it worth talking to them too as they may help me out if they were willing? Or the anonymous bit is a better idea?

Bi or gay friends could work - I lost my anal cherry to a guy who was seeing another friend, but they were both very experienced players. When you mentioned threesome I kind of imagined your girlfriend also participating with the other man...and as we talked about, those kinds of dynamics are potentially more complicated...especially if the real goal is for you to experience being with another man...

My feeling, if you really want to move forward with it, is that it may be time to talk with your girlfriend again, with some of these options in mind...

I have to admit I have been toying with this for a while. I enjoy taking a dildo so I know I like anal, but it's still a big step. I did chat to a couple of lads on Craiglist . One was up for it but came across as a little worrying and really wanted me to screw him rather than him screw me which was what I was after. The seemed much more what I was after, we even arranged a sex session at my house, but i chickened out. I still would like to try it though

It is a big step - I got it easy because I was friends with a lot of fetish type players and we'd all hooked up and were staying in the same hotel.

Inviting someone to my house, cold...I mean, that is a big deal...on different levels, so's understandable to take your time.

Even if I was a bloke, inviting someone from somewhere like Craigslist would make me uneasy, and wouldn't exactly get me in the mood. I would suggest the club idea with ten minutes with someone random would be easier.

But talk to your girlfriend and see what she says.

Yeah it does seem like a dodgy route, I had an offer on Craigslist last night that seems ok, but there is an element of risk. I am a widower so I don't have a partner to discuss it with. To be honest if she were alive I wouldn't even consider it. I think that it appeals to me because I see it as something new for me. Doesn't mean I will go down the whole gay route, but I do really want to explore it.

Have always had bi fantasies (G writing) but being in the forces for years and married to a very hompohobic ex-wife, had to keep them just as fantasies. When we got together, I was pleasantly surprised to find R had been bi since her uni days and she encouraged me to explore my bi side. My first bi experiece was during a swinger club bi night and I loved it. Have moved on a lot since that occasion and regret taking so much time to discover same-sex play.

Think it's something everyone should try, most of us are curious about what it would be like. Good luck with your exploration, before you have an MFM you need to be very, very sure of the rules. I'd recommend the neutral environment of a swinger club bi night, most clubs have such events regularly. You could always visit a men-only sauna, but if you're new that might be a bit too intense.

Judging by the comments from everyone it seems like most people are saying the same things which are check out a bi/gay night somewhere which I might do in the end! Obviously will check with the GF if she is down for that idea. Plus I am very anxious about it all as it would be something completely different for me to do, I do get very turned on by gay/bi porn so that's a step in the right direction for me I feel. x

I'm happily married now but regret not having a go experience with a woman I feel as if I would really enjoy it and get a lot from it but I think the ship has sailed

I have recently dabbled in bi/gay chat rooms and it has blown my mind! It has explored my curiousity levels massively and very soon could be doing things in reality and very excited to try things! 😊