Love his big chest…arms nice ass and the pheromone attraction is there…which only been there with 2 guys. So am in scent heaven. I love it it’s so arousing just to walk in and smell him.
Myself love my height and hair…and my shape.
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I think it’s normal and most people do feel that they could improve certain parts of their body.
For me, the key is to just be comfortable and confident in your own skin.
So what of you have a few extra lbs, wear clothes that you feel good in and make you feel sexy to boost your confidence.
Whenever I’m feeling down about the parts of my body that I don’t like, my hubby always showers me with compliments and makes me feel good again so I’m lucky.
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I have also put on weight over this year owing to my job going from being very physically demanding to just sat on my arse in front of a VC screen…and this is a bit of an issue for me. I am burning less calories than usual, but still working full hours so it’s hard to simply add more exercise into the mix. I know this will fix itself when things get back to normal but it is making me grumpy and dissatisfied right now.
But others don’t see us as we see ourselves. My (beautiful!) 13-yo daughter said yesterday that if she looks like me when she grows up she’ll be happy! What a sweetie.
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@CurvyJilly Awesome - I’ve never come across the pheromone thing but I can imagine that must be brilliant when you find that kind of attraction!
@Cupc8kes That’s awesome, my hubby isn’t the best at compliments but I find getting dressed up in some nice lingerie, even if it’s just for myself, makes me feel better. My hubby might be a bit rubbish with spoken compliments but his reaction to my dressing up is a compliment in itself!
@Silkyhat You’re right - other people do see us differently. I love your daughter’s reaction - what a lovely thing to say 
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I can answer this from a slightly different perspective and I hope this helps people.
My girlfriend - appearance-wise - is a stereotypical “babe” - slim, blonde, tall, long legs, good boobs, pretty, trendy dresser. I, on the other hand, am skinny for a man, not particularly well built and a bit of a geek. On some nights out lads told me I was punching above my weight.
But here’s the interesting part. My girlfriend comes across as confident but has told me she really isn’t. She often hates the way she looks, has hang ups about her body, thinks she’s chubby even though she’s a gym addict. I, on the other hand, am very confident albeit not in an arrogant way, with who I am as a person and how I look. I accept me for me, her for her, and others for themselves.
I’ve had lengthy conversations with her about this and helping her get to that point of inner happiness.
The point being, someone who has a stereotypically “fit” body isn’t always “happy” and vice versa. The thing to work on is being happy within yourself. Try small incremental improvements but without putting too much pressure on yourself.
I don’t know if I’ve answered this or have gone off on a tangent but I hope you can take comfort in knowing that sometimes outward appearance really isn’t what it seems.
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You sound like me 40 years ago, slim, geeky, un-sporty and punching far above my weight. I had people say behind my back " What does she see in him" numerous times (ironically the ones who said that were not exactly Adonis themselves!) also had stereotypical good looking blokes try to chat up my OH behind my back too. Despite her looks and figure she has always lacked body confidence, despite my constant reassurance. I, on the other hand have filled out and accept what i can’t change. As i said earlier personality counts for a lot. Also, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so others often find attractive what we don’t about ourselves.
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I hate when people feel that way about themselves, especially when they are in pretty good shape.
As a woman, I know that we just need to work on being more comfortable in our own bodies and stop worrying about the small stuff.
When the chat up line is
“How has he pulled you?”
When you are obviously with someone. And it’s usually the “smart” dressed ones that look like “Ken” latest phone… big watch and all that… that think they are far far superior to other blokes. Gods gift…NOT
Urgggh.
We are with someone because we are attracted to that person. Not only on the outside but on the inside too. It takes more to attraction than looks.
The icing may look and taste amazing…but the cake inside?
It’s hard…but to be confident I find dress in a way that makes you feel confident and expresses who you are…be you and the inside will shine through.
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One thing i can’t abide is arrogant blokes who think they’re god’s gift.
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@WillC Personality absolutely counts. I should really have addressed that - why is she with me, and I her? Well according to her I am someone who brings calm to her life and treats her well. I admire her greatly as she’s an amazing person. She even set lads straight who said I was punching above my weight about that.
The point being looks alone will not cut it in a relationship, at least not one worth having or one that’ll go the distance. Also that the way someone appears doesn’t necessarily align with their confidence.
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Definitely very similar to us! When personalities click, looks don’t really matter.
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One thing that has always mystified me is the flash car gits who rev them up and drive like idiots to impress the ladies. Do any ladies actually think that such shallowness is attractive?
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No I always think (and did even as a teen many moons ago)
“Pr*ck”
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Couldn’t agree more. A relationship based on mutual respect and support is one that has the best chance of lasting - we all change as we get older, but my OH is still as attractive to me now as he was when I met him (over 30 years ago)
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To help body confidence I recommend a visit to a naturist beach in summer. Your perspective will change when you see others naked as there are all shapes and sizes on the beach and most are happy to see and be seen. So throw away your inhibitions and dive in , it’s very liberating when you see bits that have spread or gone south are shared by most people and the thought occurs to you that if they don’t care why should I.
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@WillC not at all ugh!
But some women probably do, the ones interested in money instead of love.
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I thought of that as there has been a recent spate of teenage girls killed locally when in cars with young lads in hot hatches. So tragic.
Love this post @Kitty-Cat01 - what a wonderful and positive thing.
I love my boobs. They’ve cost me a fortune in bras over the years, but I love the shape and cleavage they create.
Honourable mention to my freckles which I’ve eventually learnt to accept and realise they’re part of my character, and to be fair, they’re pretty cute.
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Oh my friend i had the piss took out of me so much for my freckles as a kid, it was so debilitating.
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Just had to say I adore freckles x
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