Anonymity is a complicated topic for me these days.
Anonymity from whom?
I do feel anonymous in the sense that other forum users, my mum and dad, my friends and neighbours, and work colleagues won’t know who I am on here. I completely trust Lovehoney to keep mine and my wife’s identities under wraps.
To help keep it this way, I won’t talk about events, friendships or familial relationships that may help identify me to family, friends, or work colleagues. I won’t show my face, identifying marks like tattoos, or identifiable bits of my home in photos or profile pics either.
I’m not ashamed of my own sexuality and kinks. I just don’t want everyone to know about them, particularly if they might feel embarrassment about it.
When it comes to anonymity in a wider sense, I don’t feel quite so secure. Anonymity from private companies, highly tech savvy individuals, ‘Big Data’, governments, security services? Given that this is a public forum, existing on the internet, I’m fairly confident that I could be de-anonymised using publicly available data and privately traded information, including behavioural predictions. I’ve come to this belief after a journey of learning quite a bit about the worlds of data science, artificial intelligence, and the data brokering market.
I should stress, I’m just highlighting that I feel it’s possible, not that I feel certain anyone currently has done this for me personally with any accuracy. Or how profitable it might be. Or even how much this currently gives others power to have influence over me.
All I can do to protect my anonymity on this front is to take ownership and care how I operate online and on social media and to advocate and push towards better public understanding and regulations for how our private data is handled, processed and traded.
I choose to share my personal feelings and experiences quite openly on these forums in spite of feeling this bit of uncertainty over anonymity. It’s a question of balance. The anonymity is important, and so is the discussion.
I feel it’s important to put myself out there to get something more meaningful in return. To share and to take part.
It also feels important to me that people have this opportunity to discuss sex and sexuality with others of a like mind. This is big, important life changing stuff for some people.
I think Lovehoney’s a brightly shining example of a sex-positive and inclusive space. The excellent forum rules and moderation are a big part of this . The great people on here are another big draw too .