My ex broke up with me as I didn’t answer the phone one night and assumed I was cheating. Even after working it out that I was not cheating she broke it off as she couldn’t handle that feeling again.
If you lost the trust it may simply not work or be a very long road.
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It seems everyone has covered everything for you so won’t wade in and repeat.
I just wanted to drop on and say that I really feel for you. It must be so difficult and really hope you mange to sort it all out with each other to either move forward healthily or call it a day and be able to move on and be happy 
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Sounds like he needs to go to a therapist so he can talk about his behavior and his problems and yes bunches of red flags and if this one one of my daughters boyfriends I would be telling you that this is not a good situation and you probably should be cutting him lose before it gets worse and have you talked about this with your parents it might not be a bad idea so they are aware of this most parents will always be honest with their kids because they only want what is best for you and what I just said is from a dad’s point of view good luck
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Lots of good advice here. He’s clearly got trust issues and unless he does something, it will get worse, and will destroy what you have left of a relationship. Sounds to me like breaking up is where this will end up. Good luck and stay safe.
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I would definitely say that’s a red flag.
I understand the distance may not help the situation but from what you’ve said he already knew that before committing to a relationship.
Relationships don’t work if there is no trust and I would be curious as to where this has come from. Could it be that he has done something he feels guilty about and so he’s projecting it on you. Could he be struggling with mental health atm with stress of being layed off, covid etc. Or maybe someone has said something to plant doubt in his mind.
I would suggest if possible a conversation needs to be had as to why he’s saying these things and how this has made you feel.
It sounds very controlling to me also, wanting to know where you are etc and that is definitely not healthy.
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Why would you need gps trackers on your car etc? Everyone has a phone nowadays, so you’re virtually always in contact with anyone. That is overly controlling.
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Although there isn’t a topic for this on here there are many threads where people have openly discussed about their relationship stuff and we’ve all chipped in to try give useful advice to help. so I’d say give it a go, post any questions you have and see if any replies are of help for you 
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Thank you for all your responses. This definitely gives me food for thought. I appreciate you all allowing me to bounce it off people outside the situation. My gut has been telling me that these were red flags, but it’s sometime hard to know for sure when you’re in the middle if you’re being overly sensitive. I have had concerns about his trust issues and potentially controlling behavior and it has made me reluctant to want to move in together. The tracker on my car in particular bothered me. Anyway, thanks again. It is definitely time for an honest, frank discussion with him. I’ll let you guys know how it goes.
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Put it this way, i can think of no reason to put a tracker on my OH’s car or why i would need to know her every move.
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Hi @StarKitty79
You definitely came to the right place
From reading everything you say - I feel like it strongly suggests 1 of 3 things, and unfortunately they are all red flags.
1 - Either he is the one cheating or with something to hide, as this behaviour change is quite common.
2 - It could be a controlling thing. He always wants to know your every move, because he is worried about who you might meet on your travels and that you might start liking them more than him, and potentially want to leave him.
3 - Insecurity within himself which means he might never be able to trust you.
The only way to move forwards is to have a discussion with him about how he is making you feel and how much it hurts you. Get him to open up about his own feelings.
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@Cupc8kes - Thanks! I’m glad to know I am not the crazy one. He tries to turn it around on me and sometime you start doubting yourself. I appreciate you and everyone else confirming that I am not imagining red flags. I agree, we need to have a discussion. He wasn’t talking to me yesterday so I left him alone. He messaged me this morning, saying I had “accidentally” been blocked and wanted to know if I had texted him. I said no, but we needed to talk later. I’m at work and need to concentrate on my end of March reports. He said some weird paranoid stuff and said he would talk to me if he was still around and not in the hospital. My first thought was, “Is he on drugs or something?” We live far away, so I probably wouldn’t know as easily as if we saw each other every day, but these recent paranoia and trust problems could be explained by drug use. I know he did meth many years ago, but he has supposedly been clean for 10 years. If he’s doing that crap, that is a deal breaker. I am cool with a little pot or having a drink, hell I like beer myself, but hard drugs are out. So, we will be having a very honest discussion tonight. Thanks again for everyone’s support! You all are a fantastic community and I am so happy to be a part of it!
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Look up gaslighting, then make a decision.
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Good luck, hun. Let us know how it goes, and remember you can always come back to us for more help.
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"And not in the hospital "!? Sounds very manipulative.
May be useful to make some notes - bullet point on what you want to say so he doesn’t shoot you down, change the subject or gaslight you easily x
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Wow! I have never heard of gaslighting, just googled it. He is doing many of the things mentioned in the article I found and I find myself experiencing some of the signs mentioned. I definitely need to prepare myself for this discussion and write down bullet points as suggested, that should make it easier. Y’all are awesome! I’ll keep you posted.
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Big cwtches. This all sounds very manipulative and like massive red flags to me. I had an ex who was very much the same and sad to say it never got better, only got worse. If you have doubts now its easier to cut and run earlier, don’t feel like you are the bad guy just because of his past, you also need to be happy!
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Just try and imagine if he’s like this now, how will he be if you marry?
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Being married to him at the moment is a frightening thought. I finally talked to my Mom about the situation, she said something similar. What if you had already moved down there? He’s very tech savvy so would have a tracker on your car, probably have some sort of spying software on your phone, and hidden cameras and listening devices hidden around the house, especially since I work remotely from home. I would have no privacy and would have to explain where I have been/what I have been doing even more than I do now. I would pay for the sins of his past wife and ex’s. So, yah, this talk is probably going to end with me breaking it off. I brush off his comments much more than I should. Like last week, I was in the car headed to the grocery store and he asked where I was, I said I was in the car going to the grocery store, and he said, “yah right. So that’s what they are calling it now.” I laughed and said what the h*** are you talking about and let it go. Anyway, I do love him very much and my heart is breaking, but I can’t deal with this strange behavior that has cropped up suddenly. I just don’t know what changed.
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That last comment definitely raises alarm bells. On the back of that comment, I would run far and run fast.
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Hi @StarKitty79 Sorry, I’m a bit late to this one. I think everyone has said pretty much everything I would have said. I totally agree, there are a lot of red flags here. I hope you get to have an honest conversation with him later and you do the right thing for you. I would be concerned about the idea of him wanting to put a tracker on your car and checking up on you, it’s showing very controlling and possibly manipulative behaviour even if it is due to a difficult past. Thinking of you x
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