Girl on top position?

Hey ladies I really need advice when it comes to the girl ontop position. I’m not skinny im curvy and don’t find it sexy ontop also I struggle with the rythem and just the position in general…any tips would truly be grateful please n thank you

4 Likes

Hi and welcome. My tips would be firstly try on the sofa / edge of bed. One foot on the floor can give you more range of movement and control. Second is to have a good grind and encourage your OH you hold your hips / bum and help you to bounce to finish. Good luck

13 Likes

Hi @The_lady_in_pink, welcome to the forum

:wave::wave::wave:

Please try not to worry your image, I wouldn’t be surprised if your OH finds it sexy (but doesn’t tell you).

Be worthwhile having a chat with your OH, will make you more relaxed and them you can try and experiment.

You could also try putting a blindfold on him if that will help your confidence

8 Likes

I get really insecure about being on top too but my boyfriend loves it. Practice the riding motion with your hips on your own. Pull the duvet between your legs and give it a go! I also really like @brufton ‘s recommendation of a blindfold… think I better purchase one :yum:

5 Likes

Hello and welcome @The_lady_in_pink!

This is one of my favourite positions and I’m also a very curvy gal! I’d say the main thing is about just completely and utterly owning it. This is your position, do what feels good for you and be the powerful person you are :crown:

Some more practical tips:

  • As @brufton suggested, blindfolds are an excellent way of working out the rhythm without worrying what you look like and any faces you may pull! When you feel a bit more confident with it, you can lose the blindfold and show him what he’s got.
  • I find I can be my true wild self, particularly on top, when I’m wearing some good lingerie. If you feel confident and sexy in yourself then that 100% comes across.
  • There’s numerous ways that you can do “girl on top” and so you have to find what works for you. For example, you can be leaning forward, sitting, leaning back, reverse, grinding motion, up and down motion, feet flat/squatting. There’s loads of options and you’ll soon find a few faves and work out which are most comfortable for you.
  • Hold onto something to help your balance. My favourite is to lean over a partner and put my hands on top of my headboard for grip - this also gives them mucho boobs in face (and can help distract from other areas you may be less keen on). Another one is locking hands with a partner in the air and pushing against them if that makes sense? Sorry, very hard to describe! It gives you a sort of lever and more power I find!
  • My advice with any of the motions/rhythms is to start off slow and then gradually get faster depending what feels good. This will make it easier to find a rhythm. Also, don’t feel like you have to stick to the same rhythm throughout, mix it up! (this will also help with stamina - and remember to breathe!)
  • Practice without him. @For_Your_Eyes_Only_x made a really good suggestion with the duvet, I have done this numerous times! Also practice just moving your hips without moving the rest of your body if that makes sense?

Whilst I’m saying all that, when you’re actually doing it try not to focus too much about exactly what you’re doing and what rhythm you’re going at as this will distract you and throw you off! Just do what feels good for you and let your hips do the work :orange_heart: Your partner knows your body and undoubtedly finds you super hot so OWN it :fire:

A little note to add that if you really don’t feel comfortable doing this position then you absolutely don’t have to, there are so many other positions that you can try :blush:

13 Likes

Thank you so much for all your replies. I love the blind fold idea thank you…I think because iv recently just had a baby im the heaviest iv been so my mojo isn’t there at all x

4 Likes

As mentioned how about trying on your own as part of your solo time with a pillow towel or as mentioned a rolled up duvet or even a cuddly toy and practice the grinding while on your knees or with a suction dildo

3 Likes

@Justthe2ofus2007 from experience Grinding can be so erotic even with out a penis involved if Mrs CO grinds on a leg it’s so erotic it doesn’t always have to be PIV or toys involved the image before you is so intoxicating

2 Likes

Hi there and welcome enjoy the forum @The_lady_in_pink

2 Likes

I’m in a similar sort of position with this position :joy:. I’ve got large thighs but they are super short (as am I) and my partner has wide hips (and is super tall) so when I get on top of him my knees don’t reach the bed (or whatever surface he’s on) so I’m sort of attempting to balance while trying to get a rhythm going and I’m really struggling with it!

Have you spoken with your partner about not feeling sexy while on top? Maybe they can alleviate your worries?

2 Likes

Speaking as a guy, girl on top position is just fabulous! (As are most positions).

My gorgeous wife has some inhibitions about being on top but being able to caress her while she is riding me, feeling her use me for her own pleasure (I could go on but this post would probably be moderated) etc is wonderful…

Speaking for myself, I don’t care about the rest: I just love that fact that my wife is making love with me!

9 Likes

Try not to worry about how you look - I’m sure that your partner loves it. My girlfriend is similarly insecure about going on top when I’m doing her with a strap on, but from my perspective it’s literally my favourite view ever.

If you’re worried about movements etc you can try with a duvet/pillows and a dildo to get comfortable with the motion of things :slight_smile:

4 Likes

Oh my thank you for your lovely comments it really helps…I think since having my little one has really lowered my confidence. Xxxx

4 Likes

@The_lady_in_pink Your body has done something amazing. Be kind to it (and yourself) x

3 Likes

@Kinkypup I am exactly the same, I really struggle to get any rhythm and to be honest just have zero confidence esp as he slips out sometimes and I have to stand up to get him back in. I find I can’t “bounce” so to speak lol

My issues stem from my ex who used to huff and puff at me when I was trying and I just kinda gave up feeling crap at it and to be honest haven’t liked it since.

My current partner loves reverse cowgirl but again just can’t get the rhythm right at all :slightly_frowning_face: and never feel like I get it right.

The few times that I have enjoyed it I love the feel of it and the sensations are so different but extremely powerful :blush:

Some of the suggestions on here are really good though so might have a go esp on the edge of the sofa :slightly_smiling_face:

@The_lady_in_pink hope you find some confidence to practice and enjoy it xx

6 Likes

Can you work on rhythm together? e.g. him holding and moving your hips?
You could try holding onto his shoulders or cupping his chest and playing with his nipples if he likes that.
It can be a good position for a lot of women because it gives them more control over depth / speed of penetration etc.
I like it because I’m at an age when sex can feel sore sometimes, so I like the control, and OH likes the view - lingerie or no clothes. We work on rhythm together. It is probably what we do most, atm.
If you are finding height etc tricky then try using cushions to support knees, hips etc?
I like @SexInTheCity’s suggestions - although I don’t like blindfolds - but there are ways of adapting any position to suit you both.
If it is a matter of confidence then you could both work together on this - see if it is something you both enjoy and want to do? If one of you doesn’t, then best not to push the issue.

3 Likes

Do reverse cowgirl. You other half with love it and its so nice to watch as you are being ridden x

2 Likes

Oh yes reverse cowgirl is excellent for anyone who’s a bit shy of going on top @cheekyhubby . I love this because it’s a position that you can adapt to your needs…leaning forward allows the breasts the brush against the legs of your partner plus he gets an unhindered view of your bum while you ride him. Somehow facing away from each other makes you feel less self conscious.
Oh and pillows under the knees for support is a great tip :slightly_smiling_face:

3 Likes

Thank you so much ladies n gents this is really helpful…with all these tips hope it helps plus if it stops things from going wrong like it popping out then great…I think I’m very self aware of my body as I know he watches porn and I know il never have a body like that to be honest x

2 Likes

You shouldn’t worry. I am sure he loves your body as it is. I know most men much prefer curves and a real lady than the fake ones that are in most porn.

I find that when the mrs goes on top reverse she can really get going and often cums really quickly and she is more self conscious the other way

2 Likes