I have only tried a few times and I was terrible at it. She had no enjoyment at all.
When she gives me a blow job it is amazing. I just want to give her pleasure in return.
Please give me some hints to help me pleasure her.
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I know many people are tired of hearing it, but communication is key.
Does she already have experience receiving oral sex and enjoying it? If so, it makes sense to talk about it openly and let her explain what she likes and what she doesn’t.
If she doesn’t really know yet, there’s always the option to figure it out together. That might not feel especially sexy at first, but talk to each other while you’re at it and try different things. That way she can give you direct feedback on what feels good or if she would rather move on to a different technique or area.
One important thing for you to keep in mind is that if she doesn’t like something, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not doing it well enough. It might simply not be her preference in general, and then it’s time to try something else.
A small but very important tip on the side: don’t do it with the motivation of “returning the favor” just because she has pleased you. The mindset and desire of the person giving oral sex play a huge role for me and really make the difference between it feeling amazing or something that’s just skippable.
Oh, and one more thing: everything you see in porn is not an instruction manual. It’s made for the viewer’s perspective and should not be copied between your partner’s legs, unless she explicitly asks you to.
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Thank you @PumpkinAnon you make some excellent points here. I will communicate with her while we try it.
If it doesn’t work I will find other ways to pleasure her.
I will let her lead me in what she wants to do/try
This is something that my husband has been doing for me for nearly a year now and although it is getting better every time i have still not had an orgasm yet from oral but it is still very enjoyable.
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I totally agree with the attitude bit.
I’m 68 years old and this is my third marriage. My current wife was a very rare find. Same age as me and I’m her first husband. She had very limited sexual experiences before me. We’ve been married for about three years now. And just in the last couple of days through communication I sadly discovered she’s really “not into” giving me oral. She said she wants to do it to make me happy. But heating her say that makes me not want her to do it at all. It makes me feel like she sees it as a chore and not enjoyable.
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Dug up an older post that’s my best explanatory result, I think:
Lots of other good stuff in the thread this went on. Read up.
Also highly recommend the book “She Comes First” by Ian Kerner.
In the three years since I wrote that we continue to grow and learn, all very specific by user of course. I’ll try to think about how to disarm some of those newer thoughts and come back to drop them here…
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I second “she comes first”. I have a copy and my next thing is to mark and highlight some pages, paragraphs.
Plenty instructional videos on porn sites also.
But more importantly, just ask her for guidance. She may not like oral, my wife doesn’t seem to be a fan. Some woman are grossed out they may smell or taste bad etc.
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@Magus1957 Magus1957thank youfor sharing, I understand that feeling.it is not the same when they do something just to please you.
I hope that your wife and yourself have other things you do that she does enjoy.
I also hope your communication will help you both find new ways that you can pleasure each other and both enjoy.
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Are you able to orgasm at all?
My wife is on a LOT of drugs for different aspects. Because of this, she told me early in our relationship that she was unable to orgasm. Thankfully she acquired a small vibrator and discovered she could achieve orgasm. I was thrilled.
But in our few and too far between play sessions, she just can’t get there unless we use a small vibrator. I would dearly LOVE to be able to get her with oral skills.
Until such magical time arrives, I typically insert the vibrator in a condom to prevent moisture. Then I insert it in my mouth and hold it and manipulate it as if performing oral sex. I move it using my lips and tongue.
I recently asked her about an aspect of this. I thought perhaps it enhanced her pleasure with me combining tongue licking while vibrating. Nope (admittedly I was crestfallen with her response)
Rick
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Oh yes i can orgasm either from clitoral stimulation or piv and i am multi orgasmic so no probs there. He usually manages about 15-20 minutes before he gets neck ache or gets too hot so maybe he needs to spend longer at it
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I didn’t like it before as I was conscious and couldn’t let go. I have learned from here that pussy smells etc can be such a turn on for the OH.
I find some nice nipple play and fingering before hand and when I am more aroused my husband ventures now there and lightly licks and blows softly on my clit slowly while slipping a nice moist finger in my vagina gets me more in the mood. The more aroused I am the more he flits his tongue around my clit, slips out his finger and uses his tongue in its place instead until he is literally nearly buried down there.
He does read me very well and it depends on what I want… start slow and check in with her, tell she is a major turn on as you do it and she might feel more relaxed and give u feed back. Maybe using a nice flavoured or silky lube might help as it can get dry if ur doing it a while. I agree though it isn’t something I want everytime or isn’t for everyone. Best of luck with it
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Have you tried watching some porn for reference and seeing how they do it so to can try out a few new techniques?
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I won’t claim to be an expert on eating pussy. However, I can share a couple things that work for me. First take your time, oral isnt always the final goal, yet just the beginning. Just because she doesnt have an orgasm at first, doesnt constitute failure. Oral sex is the beginning of and an intimate journy and exploration, together. enjoy what your doing, communicate, practice, practice
Remember that not everyone is comfortable with recieving oral or thier body. Maybe past trauma holds people back from intimacy Keep in mind she is complely bare head to toe, and her lover’s face is peering into her most sacred region of her existence. Her “sexual soul”. You can’t just lay her down and yank her clothes off and dive in face first. (Though that is fun too). Begin kissing, caressing her body. Slowly work your way to her Love Pot. Allow her to get wet. Use your fingers tease her some first while caressing her body, dip your fingers in and let her watch you taste her from your own fingers. Tell her how amazing she is, how amazing her pussy tastes. Kiss her belly, her thighs, then her clit.
Pay attention to how she responds, her body, her pussy, her breathing, look up into her eyes as much as possible. Allow her to see how much you enjoy her yummy nectar.
Its ok to play with her ass as well, if you’re comfortable, give that a lick as well. Tease her back door with your fingers. If properly lubed slide a finger or two in her ass
If the two of you have already introduced toys to your playtime, dont be afraid to use them during the time you are worshiping her pussy. You can tease her clit some, while your fingers and tounge are inside her. You can insert the vibrator slightly in her pussy as you suck on her clit. pull her clit gently between your teeth as it swells. Be sure not to insert vibrator all the way in, I recommend inserting just enough to tease her, while focusing on her clit. (At times I have put a vibe in my wife’s ass , as my fingers in her vagina and suck her clit, fiercely.( Vibe her clit some while you lick 
her soaking wet pussy. Remember, just tease her clit with the vibe, bring her to a frenzy then devour her clit again with your mouth.
Another important note, stay hydrated. I love mixing my saliva with my wife’s love juice, the wetter she gets the harder my cock throbs. I love to also moan into her sweet awesome pussy as I devour her, while using my beard to mop up. Mmmm . 
Enjoy, I hope this was helpful.
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Porn for reference is a terrible idea. Porn is about what looks good on camera, not what feels good to the recipient. 99 times out of 100 she’s faking it anyway.
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I’ve heard of people recommending the “she comes first” book and really finding that insightful. Not sure if LH do books, so not sure if I can mention this. I’ll understand if moderators remove.
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Ahhh depends which sort as you can come across amateur porn or even erotic sort that gives ideas to try out and explore in sex… you might even be able to find online some useful sources exploring how to better pleasure a women down there. Bizarre the things you can find on the web 
Lots of advice mentions communication and ultimately it’s very difficult to know what’s working if there’s no communication. If you are uncomfortable talking about sex just listen to her tells, breathing, little moans or movements, look at her face to see her expressions.
Make sure you are both in positions where you are comfortable. Remember it’s not a race and you need to be in a position you can maintain. Pillows can help, under her bum to lift her slightly if she’s laid back.
Books and techniques mentioned give ideas but everyone is different in their likes and dislikes. If she doesn’t orgasm it doesn’t mean it’s terrible, something that she adores one day might not be her thing on another day. My current partners sensitivity can change so gentle teasing can be great sometimes but on other days she needs really firm pressure. As others have already said experiment and consider other ways to stimulate her not just her clit. She might enjoy a finger or toy combination with oral for a combined orgasm or enjoy other parts of her body being stimulated so use you hands.
Lastly her know how much you love giving her oral, how you love how she looks, smells, tastes.
Take it slow, listen and communicate and understand her body.
some Methods work for most such as a finger or two doing the “come here” motion while you gently lick and suck on the clit, but Iv known partners who hate internal play and only like clitoral stimulation and vice versa.
Just don’t feel like your bad at something, wether its the first, second, third or hundredth time, everyone learns new techniques etc.
Most people have covered everything, but I would say take it slow, make sure you communicate and read her body, you will be able to see when something doesn’t feel great, so move onto something else. Try gently licks, full tongue licks and gentle sucks. I love building everything up, so I tend to kiss her inner thighs, kiss above and around her labia and clit and tease with being less than a cm away and just letting her Dee my warm breathe before going back to kissing etc.. when she’s starting to wiggle I know it’s time to lick and suck her until she’s arching.
So an update, we have not been intimate for years until recently. For the last few years my wife has had medical issues which mean she can be in a lot of pain.
Having read this thread I decided to communicate and tell my wife how hurt I was when she was healthy she did not want to be intimate and that I was desperate for intimacy including sex but I understood how limited she now was.
She said she never really felt much when we had sex but that did not really upset her. She knows I liked her wearing lingerie and stockings when we were in bed, she said she would do this again but she did not like giving oral, so that sort of renders my question pointless. In reality it provides me with great advice.
We needed to find out what we could and could not do and try and make each other happy in bed.
Takes us to Saturday night where she said she planned a surprise for me. When I went to bed she was waiting wearing some beautiful lingerie from the high street and some fishnets.
She had put on lipstick and proceeded to cover my body in kisses (what a turn on) after more kisses she produces a flavoured condom and places on my erect friend and then gives me a small blow job (she had to stop due to pain). It was amazing she did not want oral in return. I finished off myself and we cuddled and agreed to try again this weekend.
So communication and compromise does work.
Thank you to all of you for replying and your advice it is much appreciated.
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