How often do you couples have sex? I want it more but the other half is less interested in it and never really puts effort in when we do
First thing, never ever compare your sex life to other people’s as there is no such thing as a normal amount. You need to find a compromise between yourself and your partner. Me and my partner goes to and down, sometimes it’s 7 days a week, once a week or sometimes once a month. As long as both are happy then the amount isn’t important.
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Good point, I think it just feels like there is only myself interested in it and if it was left to the wife we would never actually have any sex at all. I have tried talking to her but she thinks I am having a go at her
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Are you talking about it in the bedroom? Try and bring it up outside of the bedroom. Plus how old is your wife? There is a lot things to consider, is she stressed or depressed and she’s hiding it well and not telling you?
She is early 40s I’m late 30s she doesn’t seem depressed or stressed. Yeah tried talking a few times about it. Prob seems wrong and I wouldn’t but I can see why some people have affairs or for no strings fun
In my opinion people who have affairs don’t love their partner as much as they claim too as relationships are more on just sex but that’s just my opinion. But “she doesn’t seem stressed or depressed” have you asked her if she is?
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I have asked her yes and says she isn’t. I agree about the affairs and I wouldn’t do it myself. Maybe I’m being selfish and thinking of my own needs
Like I said, compromising, patience and communication is key here. Someone once here, can’t remember who said if it’s hard to verbally talk about it, taking time to write a letter and allowing other half to read it and talk about it when they want to. It’s less of a worry of any confrontations or arguments
We average once or twice a week, both equally horny and would be at it daily if we could. Only been a couple months and we don't live together and he has 2 kids thus why only 1-2 times a week.
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I've been with my boyfriend a few years now at at first we used to do it quite often but now its every few months maybe.
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Usually, if people enjoy something they want more of it. But 'desire' in its widest sense can be thrown out of kilter if we stressed, anxious, unhappy.
Lockdown is a strange time, and different people will experiemce different pressures and concerns, so do take that into account.
Then look at making sex even more enjoyable - you could buy her some romantic or raunchy (depending on her taste) bedroom wear, open some nice wine, get the massage oil out. If you are not sure you are hitting the right spots physically, ask her. If she deosn't know, experiement together with sensual touches, toys, lots of 'foreplay'. If you spend about 40 minutes aiming to turn her on before even thinking about penetrative sex, she might come round to the idea.
Apologies if you have already tried all of this. Quality rather than quantity.
Probably not as often as they say, would be my guess. As with most things it is quality rather than quantity. I would not try to benchmark something as personal as your love-life against what others are doing.
Never compare. It's different for everyone. My last relationship would often be daily and my current one we're often hard pressed to have the free time once a month.
Me and my partner sex life non existent. So I have started buying some toys to satisfy me. He never in the mood anymore
scottybob_golf wrote:
Good point, I think it just feels like there is only myself interested in it and if it was left to the wife we would never actually have any sex at all. I have tried talking to her but she thinks I am having a go at her
Myself and my partner have been through someghing like this. His libido is through the roof and for a good 3 years I was really struggling with it and we would rarely have sex...maybe twice a year..
It is difficult and takes it's toll on the relationship, but there are different ways to be intimate and a good relationship is more than just sex. It's just really important to talk and work through it slowly.
I have a much higher sex drive than my wife. It used to cause tensions and misunderstandings, but over the years we've found a balance. We normally have a quickie two or three times a week, then more intimate session maybe once a month. I masturbate a lot and watch porn, and I'm very open with her about this and about my fantasies, which I think has really helped us.
I have a high sex drive we have sex around 4-5 times a week. If we are not having sex then either she is playing with me or I play with myself. I know there is more to sex in a relationship but nothing worse than lying next to a lady feeling horny as hell as she shows no interest night after night ( I had this with an ex ). You feel unwanted and the eye does start to wonder you can’t help your feeling and may not want to look elsewhere but when you ain’t getting it at home and your frustration grows the eyes start to look elsewhere. Luckily my wife keeps me satisfied
lol ok stevie. No matter what flaws in a relationship, looking elsewhere is never justified or a excuse. Couples either have to learn to communicate or end a relationship if the two people are no longer compatible. If couples are only with each other just for the sexual side then a relationship will fail. There needs to be love there too.
EmmaC1989 wrote:
lol ok stevie. No matter what flaws in a relationship, looking elsewhere is never justified or a excuse. Couples either have to learn to communicate or end a relationship if the two people are no longer compatible. If couples are only with each other just for the sexual side then a relationship will fail. There needs to be love there too.
In your opinion... 🙂 Relationships are complicated, and we try not to pass judgement here. I don't know the ins and outs of anybody's particular situation, but it's helpful to keep this as a place where they can speak about their problems (past or present) honestly. 👍
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We have sex roughly twice a week.. but moreso than that, we hold hands, kids, touch, laugh every day because without that, what even is a relationship?
the only advice I have, communicate! Always talk, even when you don't want to! Its the most powerful relationship tool we have
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