Currently regular sex is difficult for us as my boyfriend really struggles to get an erection due to some medication he has been taking for over a year. We are going back to the doctors to figure it out but that is another story.
Most of my orgasms are from masturbation and I feel especially turned on at night where we would have had sex before. For the last few months I masturbating to orgasm when he has fallen asleep, it gets the job done but I started to feel a bit guilty and was thinking of telling him as I didn’t want him to catch me at it and him feel bad. Does anyone else have a wank when their partner has gone to bed?
A few times hun to be honest a crafty one works well talk to him he might appreciate you talking to him and he might get something out of it, it’s not something to be ashamed of.
@steph_mike absolutely. Myself and my OH suffer from the high-drive/low-drive problem…coupled with two young children and tiredness from work…she is never as up for it as I am all the time.
So yes…I quite regularly end up masturbating while she sleeps - I do also feel guilty…and ironically so does she as she knows whats going on most of the time. If i’m lucky she might help me out - but usually she’s falling asleep even if she is trying…so I can fully empathise.
I can also empathise having suffered with some erection problems in the past to.
Just a thought - is your BF in the frame of mind that he’d still be ok with “doing other stuff” other than “regular sex” to fulfil your needs? Most of the time myself and my OH are either having “standard PIV sex”, or alternatively a more “playful” time where we 80% of the time don’t even bother getting around to the “main act” as i’ve managed to get her off orally, or with toys…and I get as much of a kick out of doing that without any real penetration? It might itch that scratch? and hopefully he’s in a place that he’d enjoy that too and not feel like he’s unable to perform in the “standard” way.
I always have a wank when my wife is asleep. Either go downstairs and do it or start to play whilst next to her. Perhaps the thrill of getting caught is a bit of a turn on but I wouldn’t worry about telling your partner, they may love it.
I have done it a couple of times when my boyfriend is sleeping (usually if he is tired / hungover in the morning & I feel fine & frisky )
It is totally normal to feel guilty about it but honestly don’t beat yourself up about it! Life is so crazy atm and you have the right to both be on wavelengths - I’m sure you’ll both get back onto the same timezones soon
Have you thought about inviting him to watch? That way you won’t feel guilty and he may well enjoy watching you masturbate.
Judging by quite a few threads on here it seems that a lot of people enjoy watching their partners masturbate. It’s certainly one of my favourite spectator sports.
YES I do… it’s extra hot, I defo think it’s the ohh what if she wakes up thing, but 100% nothing to be guilty about it certainly adds a little something extra.
I love the orgasm that has to be suppressed feeling, so yes I love it And I suspect if you did mention it to your OH he would also.
Hi @steph_mike hope you are well
There is nothing at all wrong with it, if it releases the tension you will probably fine that doing this is saving your relationship
Take care and stay xx
Yes I do it helps me sleep but sometimes the wife wakes up if I’m being a bit vigorous.then she almost always takes over for a while or sometimes just pushes covers away and asks to watch which I find really a big turn on.sometimes she just encourages me on with dirty talk again a massive turn on.so don’t be ashamed at it.my wife is on medication also which drastically reduces her libido and she doesn’t get offended as she say you need to release and she rather have me wank at home and not go elsewhere to get a release
At least once a week. Sometimes I wait until she’s asleep, I prefer to do it whilst she’s awake. Sometimes when she’s not in the mood, I let her know, just say I need one and she says “don’t get it on the sheets”> I like it when she’s still awake.
It is nothing to feel guilty about, maybe talk to him so you can enjoy it while he watches or not. I often do this normally when I’m turned on and late to bed. Helps me sleep and relaxing.
I think nearly all of us do this and it’s completely normal.
I myself I’m really not a great sleeper, I’ll often wake in the middle of the night with all manner of filth running through my mind. “Midnight masturbation” has become a staple of my life and my husband is completely aware of it and fine with it - as long as I don’t wake him up
I’ve recently found out my Hubby and at first I found it really hard. Not so much that it was why he was asleep but th are y he was being so secretive about it.
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or just falling asleep, there’s nothing wrong with that.
Sometimes just easier to sort yourself out when they are tired and you’re horny. Don’t feel guilty about doing it.
