Hey yāall, some may have noticed Iāve been MIA the last few months but now Iām ready to get stuck in again!
Firstly happy late Christmas and merry year of new I hope everyone has had a most blessed festive break with many delights under the tree or in your hoho stockings lol
So now for my waffle bit. As some might remember from a few of my posts/replies last year (feels weird saying that) I was least say tangled up in feelings for someone that I really liked and had hopes for building my first relationship with after spending nearly 2 years connecting online with themā¦ (Facebook status: itās awkward) long story short, I finally got to meet them a few times and it was lovely although on second visit they didnāt feel the āconnectionā and literally leading on from that things quickly unraveled into a toxic mess. In turn opened my eyes to how lucky I was and oddly I didnāt feel upset or anything actually with how it ended, a little relieved yes, totally emptied even more so. The one thing what did get to me and for reasons why I decided I needed āme timeā was I had this inner sadness bubble up again and it wasnāt anything to do with them but rather felt like a disconnected part of my soul was crying out to the surface from the empty inside meā¦
Which now leads me into my present day. Iām back on the dreaded dating stuff, reconnecting with friends and more guarded than ever over my mentality. This year Iām gonna make a promise to myself that Iām not gonna be put through it all again and if someone likes me then they are gonna be doing the leg work to prove worthy of my affections.
As they say, itās always better to be alone than in a toxic relationship. Not only for your mental health, but financially and at times physically (spent 16 years there, so I totally get it).
All I can say is that the right person is out there for you, itās just a matter of finding them. And in the meantime, āyou do youā as they say, enjoy life as best you can, rediscover yourself, get comfortable in your own skin, and youāll find that right person will pretty much fall into your arms. Best of luck, mate.
Iām glad youāre back. Iām sorry it didnāt work out the way you had hoped but it sounds like you learned stuff from it and hopefully are a stronger (and maybe longterm happier?) person for it.
Donāt look for someone willing to put in all the leg work though, find someone who wants to put in as much as you do. The two way thing seems to always end up with the best result. I hope you find the special person who will make you happy this year and enjoy the freedom of single life in the meantime.
Sorry to hear it didnāt pan out as intended, but you let yourself try! Only be trying out new things can we grow as people, and meet more like minded people too, so try not to let it put you off being open with others
I had to kiss a few toxic frogs before finding hubby - the only way is up!
Welcome back, nice to see you on here again.
Like the others said, better without someone toxic in your life. Hopefully a new year will open up better opportunities for you to meet someone whos right for you
Welcome back @AJSTAR Sorry to hear things didnāt work out with the person you were involved with, but good on you for recognising that things were toxic and backing away. It takes strength to do that.
I applaud this attitude As others have said, your advice on this forum is always kind hearted and you shouldnāt settle for anything less than what you deserve - someone who respects you, cares for you and appreciates you.
Thank you thatās really kind to say and yes I see now it was for the best as towards the end parts I felt like I was walking eggshells every time I messaged them and all my friends told me Iād put up with way more than any normal person would do so I kinda take comfort in that I gave it a fair try and now I know next time round I need to be a little more thoughtful to myself and my needs
Thank you yes Iām defo not rushing into anything new and am gonna focus on myself a little bit.
Oddly from talking to them for all that time and ended up only meeting them twice, I never saw it as a relationship even though I practically stayed away from all temptations like a nun to save myself for them but alas they didnāt think to show the same courtesy. It was all rather bizarre from a higher perspective.
I hope everyone has had a most blessed festive break with many delights under the tree or in your hoho stockings lol
before finding hubby - the only way is up!
As others have said, your advice on this forum is always kind hearted and you shouldnāt settle for anything less than what you deserve - someone who respects you, cares for you and appreciates you.
yes Iām defo not rushing into anything new and am gonna focus on myself a little bit.