Oral sex

[VJ1981]

I’m fairly new at giving oral sex to my wife and just have a few questions. I’m looking for tips on how to make it the best I can? I’m just curious what your choice would be if you had to choose between actual intercourse or just oral?

[Vannesatart]

Well, We Both Prefer Oral Nowadays.

My Wife has a Severe Spine Problem and Finds it can sometimes be painful during Intercourse, And i Suffer from ED sometimes.

She Is Clean Shaven down below, I am Not but I’m not overly Bushy, Her being Clean Shaven adds to the feeling for Her, And I Love the Taste Too !.

We can both Orgasm/Cum through Oral Sex and it can lead to Me getting an Erection and Cumming inside Her, After that there is More Fun with the Clean Up !.

[JustSomeFun]

I wouldn’t look at it as oral or intercourse generally, as you can very much have both interchangeably in one session.

But if you want to learn what’s best for your wife, you could offer up a session focusing on her and let her know that intercourse is off the table, and all she needs to do is receive.

You can then encourage her to guide you, or tell you what she likes, and explore this way. Assure her that there is no rush, or expectation.

Depending on how she normally orgasms or her comfort level of receiving, she may not be able to reach orgasm straight away, so introducing a clitoral vibrator or similar could be a good idea for a helping hand.

Hope that helps!

[Pogo69]

Do you orgasm from oral when you are soft? I too have ED but not very often. However one time when it happened my wife gave me oral with the intention to blow up my cock (lol). But what actually happened was I had the most intense orgasm from oral that I ever had and my cock was wasn’t even close to being hard. We have tried it again but I get hard all the time before cumming.

[LRLRL]

Hello, and welcome to the forum! I’m sure you’ll get lots of great replies but wanted to point out that if you use the search function you’ll also find years worth of responses and feedback on the topic! Because I know I’ve written quite a few bits about my approach of going down on my wife - my very favoritest thing - I just searched through my activity to find these past posts.

I’m biased, but I like my reply here and think it holds up alright:

Going down

I highly recommend reading “She Comes First” by Ian Kerner. Primarily devoted to women’s anatomy, arousal process, and cunnilingus technique. Otherwise, in no particular order, here are some quick tips: Listen to your partner’s feedback, verbal and otherwise, to what they like (this one actually is in order, and the most important part). My wife is not crazy about direct g-spot stimulation and no amount of reading that tells me to try it this way or that way will change her preferences. So li…

This is also a good thread with lots of tips and specific techniques to try, and because I remain biased I’ll just drop the direct link to my reply.

Advice Sought - giving oral

First off, caveat that everything is subject to preference, so if you try something and she’s like, no, that doesn’t mean you did anything wrong to try something new. These are just ideas… Start slow - long, slow laps from “bottom” of vulva to clit, along with slow laps around the edges/outside of the labia majora. Increase speed gradually until you’re proving steady and consistent licks to her clit. For more controlled experiences, try to draw that first lock out to a 10-count, repeat a few t…

As to the other half of your question, I would be sorely disappointed to go the rest of my life without ever going down on my wife again, but I think intercourse wins. Even when I’m going down on her she wants me inside as soon as she cums so that she can squeeze around me. If she had a to choose, I think she’d pick intercourse as well. If I were an easier cum from oral it might sway, but as I’m not I must be true to our mutual satisfaction.

[I_ll_try_anything]

I can’t improve on @LRLRL ‘s reply so I’ll just give an answer to your final question.

I’d choose oral. I’m getting to an age where finishing during regular sex is getting harder. Not impossible, I’ll quickly add .. but its just age and health ( Covid to be precise ). Eventually happens to us all ( Covid as well ) .

But I could spend hours giving oral. I love it. Quite probably my favourite thing to do for my OH and the most intimately close I feel to her orgasm. I have no urge to cum while I’m doing it all though if we 69 then I inevitably will and bury my face in her as I do. Thats my happy place.

Saying that, theres something to be said to kissing someone as they cum. Thats also beautifully intimate.

[Pogo69]

I think your happy place is very similar a lot of us. My face between my wife’s legs makes me so happy.

If I could only do one and only one sex act with my wife the rest of my life it would be giving her oral. While PIV is amazing, I can get similar to that myself, but there is nothing that simulates the joy I get from licking my wife.

[DaveT69]

Think of it as a buffet - you have a bit of this a bit of that, go back for more of this, take some more that. For me giving oral is what gets me going. I love going back and forth a little oral a little penetration, back to oral, back to penetration. It isn’t A or B - but ABABABABABAABABA

[Latestr8]

It’s not an either/or thing, but another way to please each other. And oral, as opposed to PIV sex means the one receiving the pleasure can concentrate on just that, so it can be so much better with no burden to do more than one thing at a time. It is a lovely way to honor your OH.

[Happyhubby1981]

An all you can eat buffet.

[Tenshadesandme]

Slow oral then slow, deep and connected intercourse with plenty of eye contact and kissing. Tantric sex all the way

[batjamboree]

Welcome to the forum @VJ1981

Personally I go for oral over penetration as it’s more pleasing as a woman to receive

[Scottishfunk]

There’s no right or wrong way, only what works. Ask your partner. And buy “she comes first” by Ian Kerner​

Just relax and explore, your partners body will let you know when it’s good.

[CandB_Toy_Story]

Welcome to the forum @VJ1981 nothing to add to the good replies above. I agree with @Scottishfunk

[VJ1981]

May I ask why you prefer oral over penetration?

[Brian_Lisa]

Definitely not an either or for us. We also don’t use oral just as foreplay and will switch during a session. My partner is capable of multiple orgasms but can get sensitive so changing from internal to external clitoral play and vice versa can keep her going or she’ll switch to pleasuring me. I love tasting her when she’s really wet and find it a massive turn on watching her lick her juices from me.

For tips there are many threads on oral but mine would be:

• everyone is different so listen for the feedback your partner gives, words, moans or movements
• Get yourselves in a comfortable position so you can take your time, pillows can help. Don’t race to get her off.
• Try combining stimulation, using hands or toys.
• Let her know how much you love it
• If she ever says don’t stop then make sure you keep doing exactly what you are doing

[batjamboree]

With oral it’s more stimulating to the clit compared to penetration

[Wood-Nymph]

I prefer penetration as i like to feel him thrusting into me and i can orgasm from penetration alone. Oral for me is ok but have not orgasmed from it yet. I think hubby prefers oral for him as he feels a lot more, down to my skills.

[DaveT69]

I love it. I love getting in there playing around. Switch out for some penetration, then get back in there and eat. Back and forth back and forth. So much fun.