Hope it was enough...
Thanks era
Up to you, but I just wish I could help some more. :)
You've already been very helpful you know
There are limits to what I am willing to share on here, due to the public nature and copyright policy of this forum. That's a choice of mine. :)
I understand and respect that. I probably shouldn't share that much info either but I don't really care people knowing about my story or lovehoney using it.
I'll be waiting for when you want to open more :)
mamz wrote:
I'll be waiting for when you want to open more :)
Ok then, I'll just cancel that other thingy.
Don't? I want to talk about that with you that's what it ment. I'm waiting for you to come to me now
I guess we just don't understand each other right now because we aren't explicit enough
mamz wrote:
I guess we just don't understand each other right now because we aren't explicit enough
Yep, might be lost in translation between us speaking a "foreign" language. :)
I have not yet done anything, but I did notice it is bound to expire by the 27th. Have not received anything though on there... :/ Should have I?
Yes twice. Maybe chek elsewere? Another place that could be linked with the accunt perhaps? I hope we do understand each other this time
I checked in my account, and it is also supposed to send me an email when there's something up. Maybe they need to moderate first? No clue. If they do, they are pretty fast, so we should probably know by tomorrow.
Come here and do it as much as you want.
A thing I leraned when I got with my bf is that it is always possible. After I was with me ex (which was bad to me) I didn't believed that any men would be worth it and I thought they were all as bad. Only a few months after we broke up I knew I was wrong as I was getting to know my BF better. What I want to say is that of course there is hope.
Also, am I wrong to say that you seamed to like her pretty much but you are afraid of love and refrained from feeling love for anyone?
I want to give you some love. You are capable of love, here's a proof: you and me, we both love each other (without wanting to sound weird). I love you, and I know you love me too. It's not the same kind of love, of course, but it's still love and it's still valuable. There is nothing more to be implied to it so it's not even a dangerous kind of love like the one you are afraid of.
I think you may want to let go on that idea of love that you have. I am sure you could benefit from loving someone without anything else (no sex involved or anything). Sex is something that you can love without, but love is not. You can get really close to someone without having sex with them, and then, love start to take place. It was this way with my boryfriend too. That way, if you feel very close to someone and love them and know they love you back, but aren't having sex, I think you have a chance to really know the person. You can know that person well and you can know deep inside if you can trust her/him. When real love is implied, you can feel it (espacially when it's in a healty relationship).
when I first got with my bf, we weren't having sex. We did have sex normally for a while, but after that I realised that I wasn't happy with that and things started being more and more complicated. All this time, he was there with me. He does care and still wants to have sex, but his love for me is stil more important than that. He has told me a few times that he would be willing to stay with me if we were to never have sex again if that was what would make me happy (all he cares about is that I am happy). This experience's been really difficult, as you know, but it also has its benefits. It really helped me know that it is true love and that he is a good guy, with me for the good reasons, and that he would do anything for me. If it wasn't of the situation, I don't know if I would've realised it (you know I still have a few trust issue and close to no faith in the goodness of men).
This type of relationship also feels safe. It is not (as well as any relationship) because when you are really close to someone there is always a risk, but the biggest risk for you is not there. Don't seek for what may seem a normal relationship, seek for love. Love is everywhere. Try to feel your love for every person that's close to you (if there is any, I know life has been harsh on you), feel love for life, feel love for yourself. Fill up with that feeling of love and then, you'll maybe be able to feel romantic love for someone, without any harm.
his is not for everyone, and I know it may sound too philosophical, but I was feeling that sharing you my view on this could maybe help you a little.
alone4ever wrote:
Yes I do Love you Mamz. With you it was like going back in time and helping myself when I was young, and the fact that you are a woman made it more so, because of how I feel about being a man. SO it's like loving myself, if that doesn't sound weird.
When I was in my 40's I had a sort of friend, we had know each other for years. Then one day she let me know that she wanted us to be more. We dated a couple times, then she said she wanted to have sex, I told her that I didn't want to have sex until we were in love. She said ok but kept pushing me, every time we met she wanted to know if I was in love with her yet. she said that she was in love with me after only a few weeks. She said that sex was very important to her, and I just caved in; I was scared to loose her.
She was not very knowledgeable about sex, and I showed her things she had never even imagined. I created my own nymphomaniac, without even having PIV sex with her, as I couldn't manage it. Then it became all about her sex life, she wouldn't even give me a massage in return for me pleasuring her for several hours. We never left the house together, she cancelled all the dates I planned, to go drinking with her mates, or to just so I could finger her.
This is the only kind of love I have ever had back from anyone. And the worst part is that I know what real love should be, I have given it to those people. Even so called friends and family use me.
I'm scared it will be the same again, if I try; thats why I tried miss FWB at least she found a way to give me back everything I gave to her, in terms of sex. so even if it was only sex it was mutual; and dare I say, even loving.
It's hard to keep hope alive, but my young other self, (you) has a good love, and I am happy. I have tears now so it's hard to see what i'm tping
- > That makes perfect sens to me.
-> I can relate to that too. I know how it feels and how it's hard to hold on to your conviction when the other keeps pressuring you. I now understand that someone acting like that is not a great loss. Someone who starts in a relationship by pressuring you will never be a good partner to start something serious and healthy, so you better let her go at that moment.
-> I am not sure you can even call this love. Being used and abused by people isn't love. You don't diserve that kind of love, you diserve the right kind. I know that when you have only known that, it's easier to accept it because even if you know it could be better, you don't believe in it (since it never happened to you). But if you keep your convictions your gonna be able to keep your standards high untill you meet the right person. When this happens, you'll find that waiting was worth it. Plus, the more you experience bad relationship, the more hurt you become and the more difficult it's gonna be to overcome this.
Just keep in mind that I was like that too before I met the right guy. We are not that different you and me so I am sure you'll experience the same and then you'll relate to everything I just told you. And if I could do it, you can do it too. Please, take care of yourself and don't rush into any relationship that you know with your deepest feelings is bad (because yes, you know it). Be happy for yourself (and not your yonger self), cause you'll know better one day.
Why is it bad to want an orgasm? I know that wanting one prevents me from having one but How am I supposed to be ok with the fact that I can't orgasm at all?
I feel like I am slowlly starting to see sex as an act of love and I start to feel it too but I still can't orgasm even though it's really good. Why should I be ok with that if my partner doesn,t have that problem and can easily orgasm? if it was equal and we both didn't, I wouldn't mind not having one, but knowing that I am not able to achieve it makes me feel like it's not worth it.
I don't think it is bad to want an orgasm. It is a big part of the sex and personally I don't feel satisfied if I don't have an orgasm. I also think it is not fair that men can come so easily while some women have to struggle a lot to be able to have an orgasm.
I can only orgasm by clitoral stimulation and it just makes me so jealous knowing that some women can come from vaginal or anal stimulation. It does not feel fair.
I feel the same. I'm jealous of men also but try not to think about it because it affects me too much and only makes things worse
I feel so hopeless that I start thinking "well there is nothing I can do, it'll never change. At least we love each other so let's focus on that". It's like giving up. The thing is I see a difference after that. I feel more love between each other, I feel more turned on and his touch feels better. I start to feel close to him and to feel like I am the one stopping myself from enjoying sex. This then makes me feel like it's possible for me to feel pleasure, but I still don't orgasm. This gets me so frustrated and so hopeless. Even when I feel better while having sex and feel more pleasure this aspect is still missing. I just can't resign myself to never have orgasms with my partner. It's even more frustrating thinking about the fact that I could before and that now that I sometimes feel better and less pressured when we have sex I am not able en orgasm. What's wrong with me? I just don't know how I could get out of this situation.