ive always been really nervous that im not good enough in the bedroom department for my wife and keep trying to find ways to improve, and at times i can get so para about it that i keep worrying that im not big enough to satisfy
so to all ladies out there, does size really matter or is it how its used?
As long as its average or above for me... I do like to be able to feel it!
Using minimum 5 and a half inches [UK average apparently] its then how you use it, your personality, confidence, arrogance [a little bits good] and the positions.
Saying that I would prefer 7-8 inches :D
I'm not sure of your size so Im sorry if I upset you!
xxxx
I agree with MC about average or above, I like to feel it. But not huge!
When I was younger I was going out with a guy who was huge and my first reaction when I saw it was 'hope you don't think you are putting that anywhere near me!' We did however have sex and he was always a pure gent. Always taking it gently and at my pace, let me take control ect so not to hurt me but honestly I never really enjoyed it, couldn't ever have a right good hard fuck because of his size. So bigger definetly isn't always better.
Yes SLM right with you there, I was with one guy in the past who was a F buddy and he was SO huge, like really big. I always had to go on top.. if we tried any other way it just hurt too much!
Saying that I did cum within about a minute of climbing aboard!
x
Yup I would say it's a bit of both too. Technique is everything as in most things as is knowledge of your OH's body and what she likes where she likes it and of course dislikes plus having the confidence to put all this knowledge into action! It's all well reading a manual on how to fly a plane, but you try flying one! Lol. Love is a big factor too of course. Have confidence in your cock! SG69
I think that it's what you do with it, I am lucky as my OH is just the right size for me but if he had a small penis it wouldn't bother me, i know he can make me come with his mouth or fingers. I've never had an orgsm through penetration alone so it wouldn't bother me at all! I think you should talk to your wife and find out how she feels and what she likes and you can tell her what you like too as magic hands said Manogamy seems like a good ice braker, i've got it to play on Valentines day. Good luck!
A bit of both. During my sexual escapades I have had both extremes - a dinky one and a HUUUUGE one! and neither were particularly good. Infact the huge one was awful cuz it hurt so much! - worst sex i've ever had!.
I think of myself as a hardcore fan of "Mr. Average" :-D but it helps enormously if he knows how to use it to best effect - that goes for the little ones aswell!
Yep, got to be a bit of both. Guess my guy is pretty average, but he uses it bloody well! He's definitley the right size for me, if ever want something huge I'll get a dildo out!
Size is not important, it's quality, and there is always foreplay!!! :-)
We are becoming more experimental, and the fun we have is always good, sometimes we try
things and end up falling about laughing. Sometimes sex can be so serious, yet it's good to have fun along the way :-)
mbtoo wrote:
Yep, got to be a bit of both. Guess my guy is pretty average, but he uses it bloody well! He's definitley the right size for me, if ever want something huge I'll get a dildo out!
would agree - I maybe a bit above average but its a case of doing whatever pleases your partner, and not getting too insecure if she does enjoy taking a big toy now and again - especially if she lets you use it on her x
girth and length.... Had a boyfriend once, stuck my hand down his trousers and my eyes popped open and then watered. He did not get near my knickers, I just knew it was FAR too big both ways for me.
So I would not like a big monster trying to ram me. I've had big enough for me and it hurt like hell and I kept on bleeding (and my virginity is something I lost too many years ago!) and I've had teeny small and you know what, he worked that boy good! He was so confident it helped plus he was very good with technique (hip action etc) and tongue and hand.
Really, that's what matters to me... as long as you know what to do with it and can use it well - then I'm not bothered about size (except the large end of the scale).
I'd agree with above. Some size can be nice (my OH is nearly 8" long and 6" circumference and I wouldn't want him any bigger as I'm small/tight so logistically it's tricky at times and can hurt when he enters me even if he's made me cum a few times!) but I'd say it really is what you do with it - or in particular what you do with everything else! Forget the expression 'foreplay' because for a lot of women licking/touching IS the main event and what's going to get them off and PIV isn't necessarily going to rock their boat in the same way it might for men. I know some women love penetrative sex and I'm finding I'm getting more from it of late as we've been touching my g-spot and things BUT you can't beat orgasms from oral and touching. If that's all up to scratch and you give her a few before there's any PIV then I'm sure she'll be a happy bunny :-)
For me, its not length but girth that makes all the difference. However, more important than that is the technique in using it! Any guy who can have sex with me in such a way that gets my clit into the action at the same time will have me coming no matter how big or small he is.
I'm with Ecksvie - I like thicker - long usually hurt with an ex's 9" - felt I was being jabbed - not ravished IYKWIM.. OH's is just short of 7" & stretches me just enough...Mmmmm...
But it really is what you do with it that counts. OH was nervous on our honeymoon (12 years since his late wife had died) & he ended up unable to perform by the third day/night - but I helped him, he says, by being confident myself & taking him off blood pressure meds & feeding him a far healthier diet. His BP is normal now & his erections rock-hard - every time - lucky me!!!! :)
Size has never bothered me and in general I prefer it on the small side from a practical point of view but that's just me. Then there's the added benefits of it being easier to give great head and anal won't make your eyes water.
From my experience the endurance, staying-power and general sex charisma has never correlated with size. In fact I would go as far as to say that the men on the small side have better moves. (no such thing as over-comensating with skill in this game.) I've got my favorites but every woman has a different preference because everyone is a different fit. The part of a man that is simultaneously his most vulnerable and powerful spot carries it's own personality that the size is just one of many keys to it's charms.
I really feel sorry for chaps with how many absurd studies are published every year claiming the national 'average' or terror reports of the 'optimum' length and girth. You could have God's gift to penises but it's no bloody use if it's not attached to a top bloke who knows how to please a woman and knows that confidence is damn sexy. And if you think large lads have got it made you can bet they've had the worries I've heard from fretting they'll hurt someone, condom stress, general practicalities and feeling like 'donkey-boy' as one gentleman put it. And if not you can be sure they've got other body issues. There's pros and cons to every inch.
To anyone feeling inadequate I recommend googling gallery sites where anyone around the world is welcome to put up their own, um, *intimate* portrait. Channel Four have set up theirs on the Embarrassing bodies site. NSFW natch:
http://www.channel4embarrassingillnesses.com/galleries/penis-gallery/
Tigerlilies wrote:
Size has never bothered me and in general I prefer it on the small side from a practical point of view but that's just me. Then there's the added benefits of it being easier to give great head and anal won't make your eyes water.
Very true. I gave my OH's stats above, and although I do like it I wouldn't want it any bigger. He sometimes says he wishes it was bigger and I'm like "Where do you think it would fit?". As I said, sometimes it hurts me as it is and I agree about the jabbing that was mentioned in another post above. If it's too long then, particularly in doggy, it just bangs your cervix and hurts. That's probably why women grimace and shout in porn films! lol
And ditto about giving head. I've said elsewhere (on the blowjob good or bad? and deepthroating threads) that a larger one really does make it more of a "job" and it can be off-putting. Knowing it's going to be tricky, give you jaw ache and weirdly sometimes I get numb lips after a while too, can make you feel like you don't want to go down that road. It does me sometimes anyway. Just because it can be uncomfortable. Or in certain positions it strains my neck even because of the pressure put on keeping my mouth open wide for a sustained period. Equally with anal, this is something we tried and I was surprised that we managed to get half of him in as I didn't see that ever happening! Then we tried another time recently and he'd only got the head in and it was burning and very painful so we stopped. If he was on the petite size I'm sure it wouldn't be quite so much of an issue.
If it is a bit smaller then it's still going to reach in far enough to rub the g-spot (even if not the a-spot) and you can do positions to maximise it - say, like doggy with you going in a bit more vertically. I was once with a guy who had a very small willy, but he was brilliant at oral - it's like he could read my mind!
I'm sure if you're a sensitive and skilled lover then your wife won't care if it's 5" and not 7" or whatever! Just enjoy it and what you do together :-)
Mistress Cara wrote:
As long as its average or above for me... I do like to be able to feel it!
Using minimum 5 and a half inches [UK average apparently] its then how you use it, your personality, confidence, arrogance [a little bits good] and the positions.
Saying that I would prefer 7-8 inches :D
I'm not sure of your size so Im sorry if I upset you!
xxxx
thanks everyone for the help :) and MC do not worry you did not offend and no one else had done either :), it was actually reassuring what alot of people said because im over UK average :D
I'm sure it's fine! And you've got two kids so it clearly 'works' in that respect too ;-) Just enjoy it x
It has nothing to do with size - it's about suitability, no point being massive if your misses is tiny and vice versa!
Ax
But props to you gentleman who can pull off a Puppetry of the Penis move.
Just not in the bedroom, please.