I have recently discovered through porn that I quite like the idea of pegging. I have mentioned this to Mr L, who naturally was a little scared of the idea. I have been looking into it more on the LH website looking for things that might work. We enjoy anal with me as the reciever but have only really done little bits here and there with Mr L as the receiver and it is all down to that 'macho' viewpoint and how his friends will joke around him that men don't do stuff like that..... which we all know being on here is certainly not the case!
He is open to trying new things, and other than this we have enjoyed a pretty varied sex life. Does anyone have any suggestions/reccomendations AND words of advice please? I know a good lube is a must, but we have never ever pegged before so would love to hear from you experienced people please.
I think starting slowly is probably the best advice you will receive. We started with a small vibe but my oh prefers something which give mutual stimulation. Some people see Pegging as a role reversal or a dom/sub situation ( if it is for you then have an idea of how your scene is going to go, communicate with your partner and arrange a safe word ), for us it's not either of those things it's just another way to give each other physical pleasure. For us traditional strap ons don't appeal (yet). So we went for strapless strap ons, they take practice to get right but we love them, and my oh felt they were less intimidating. Relax, lots of lube, and be vocal about how much you're turned on, my oh found it reassuring that he wasn't the only one getting pleasure from the act, which helped him relax. Positions can be tricky, we have a big height and weight difference, so experiment and have fun!( I hope there was something useful in that ramble)
I would buy a small strapon, like 5 inches long, maybe 3-4 inch diameter. Get one as un-penis looking as possible then one night while he's in the bath or shower go and put it on and see what happens. In the mean time, make sure to give his ass loads of pleasure, kissing, licking, small toys and fingers. He'll come around to the idea, especially if you're already equipped with a non-phallic, non-scarey strapon.
Start with fingers and toys, he will need to be pretty well able to relax back there for a strap-on to be enjoyable. Much easier when your using hands and toys to be careful and gentle. When he can comfortably accommodate a toy that is a bit larger than the strap dildo then your ready to have a Bash!
Thanks for all of your replies everyone. After sending him a link to a LH strap on, he has retreated back to 'oh no I can't do it'. So I guess it's on the back burner to wait and see if he changes his mind or not at some point in the future.
I feel that you went in with "strapon" a lot too soon. He would have maybe found it a lot less intimidating, if you had got more into basic anal play first; with fingers and small toys. Doing this over a period of time, would have got him more relaxed with the idea of anal, pegging being something he may have started to think about on his own, some what latter.
You may have cooked your goose a bit now.
We have already used butt plugs on him, fingers, tongue ect.. But when he isn't horny he won't even consider it - mid way through sexy time he will be open to anything... like he's relaxed and loses his inhabitions in the moment. He does enjoy that type of play... but I think the strap on idea just takes it that one step further. I for sure have scared him today lol!
Try going back to what you have been doing, only more often, if you can; that's assuming he will even let you go there at all after this.
If it's just a now again thing, he won't have had chance to get past the, "not unless he's horny" phase.
Yeah, it's not an every day thing and tbh I probably wouldn't want it to be. I find men so funny - he'd happily play with my bum everyday! Thanks for your help as always, Alicia4Ever... What would I do without you! :-)
We are completely new to pegging. We got a beginners pegging stap on. Its not intimidating at all.It doesn't look like a penis so I think that helped with my husbands thoughts of having a penis up his bum.We both had a few drinks to help us relax and we both really enjoyed it. I surprisingly enjoyed it more than I thought I would and my husband loved the role reversal. We have since tried it again and it was really nice. I think im going to buy a double ended one so I get more benefit from it aswell. Its certainly not a regular thing for us, but its nice to know its in the draw if we want it. Most of all we just have fun. Good luck
Mrs L you could try grinding on his back while he has a butt plug in, stimulate his ass as tho you f**king him, wife does this me and it's a hell of a turn on. That way it can be a spur of the moment thing instead of prepping for full on anal
i am going to be doing this for the first time in a few weeks.... i want to get a bullet to pop into the strapon but am not sure what i need to go for? any advice?
As has already been said start slowly and lube up. It took a long time to get my husband ready got the first time. I started by buying a strap on which was rather life size. He was a bit scared of what would happen to his bum so I purchased a small butt plug to get started. Then a bigger one followed. At each anal practice session I ensured that I masturbated him to orgasm. After a lot of practice the night arrived when I finally took his cherry 🍒 😂. He loved it and I got a great feeling of being in control, he said that he really loved surrendering himself to me. We now still used the butt plugs as foreplay then get down to some good thrusting. He no longer worries about his bum as he can now take what ever I push in him.
So everyone, I have been a bit MIA recently on Lovehoney. We moved into an incredible new house, literally everything I could have ever dreamed of, but the downside is that we had SO much to do. My god it's been stressful. Anyway, IM BACK!
With an update of course.... We had been bickering a little due to the move, I mean who wouldn't! And I was like right we need LH to the rescue, lets get some excitement and about £300 later (oops) I have a huge order arriving today.... and guess what's inside.... A STRAP ON! He said oh why not lets give it a go... totally couldn't believe it!!!!
What one did you go for? My Mrs and I were joking about this the other night and are considering trying it...but we have never done anything like it as a couple,
Great to hear a success story, just remember to take it slow and let your partner take the lead in rhythm to start with. If your partner backs on to you and gets comfortable then you can take him by the hips and take control. Happy for yourself and your partner and congratulations on the move ☺️